I always ask to speak to the Manager and explain vaping to him/ her because I understand I am on Private Property. Recently, for the first time, I was told they would not allow vaping in their establishments and I was ok with that BUT the Manager was classy enuff to explain his reasoning. He stated if someone were to have a severe allergic reaction to the vapor he could be liable. I thanked him sincerely, stated I understood and accepted his explanation. Much to our surprise(wife and I) the Manager sent us a bottle of Pinot Noir, compliments of the restaurant. A class act and we will be going back regardless of their vaping policy.
As for the waitress running across the room screaming...completely unacceptable behavior and the waitress should have IMMEDIATELY reported to and asked the Manager to intervene and resolve the issue.
Now that's a manager that knows how to recover a situation. Odds are you would have put that restaurant in your "maybe" category for returning to, but for the low cost of a bottle of wine, he has a returning customer. Such simple things.
As a member of the food service industry I apologize on behalf of the back of the house. Sounds like the front of the front the house employees need some training in respect and tact. If I had been treated as you were I would have not only demanded a refund, but also the manager. The behavior of staff is appalling, and unless they were retrained or fired I wouldn't step foot in there again.
I work on the hotel side of the hospitality industry, but am in school for it as well. One of my favorite professors on campus has a restaurant background, and I've learned so much neat stuff from him that I wouldn't normally learn. I'm tempted to forward this story to him, just so I can see how aghast he would be about it. You just don't treat guests like that. (I abhor the term customer really).
I'm curious to see what the response from the GM will be.