AWWWWW!! Thanks for the vote of confidence. Not sure if she is lucky, but I sure as hell am. I am able to do what I want, when I want, as long as the kids are taken care of and the bills are paid. Pretty sweet deal, if you ask me.
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AWWWWW!! Thanks for the vote of confidence. Not sure if she is lucky, but I sure as hell am. I am able to do what I want, when I want, as long as the kids are taken care of and the bills are paid. Pretty sweet deal, if you ask me.
When I spent to much on e-cigs. I always gave my wife the "would you rather I smoke real cigarettes" It worked for a few weeks till she checked the credit card statement 
I'll need to make do with what I have now I guess... Well at least for a few months anyway
I'll need to make do with what I have now I guess... Well at least for a few months anyway
She's become somewhat resentful to them because my attention will always seem to drift to my pv.
.Also she is a minimalist when it comes to this so far. She once said " why do we need anything more?!" She is about not fixing something that isn't broken.
She's become somewhat resentful to them because my attention will always seem to drift to my pv.
.Also she is a minimalist when it comes to this so far. She once said " why do we need anything more?!" She is about not fixing something that isn't broken.
Hey - That's what I do! I order something new for the husband too, so he doesn't lecture me. New toys for everyone!
I'm one of the lucky ones. I've been talking about iHybrids to my wife (I really want one of the LE's), this morning she told me to buy one of the new F3CTAs with it.
Here's a tip. Mutual respect and understanding. See your relationship through your mate's eyes. If he/she feels neglected, you're going to get hints. If you're ignorant to the hints, you or something you care about will be attacked (not violently, hopefully, but verbally, mostly, hopefully).
I don't think this issue, OP, has much to do with your new hobby/habit, but rather your mate's feeling of lack of attention. It could have something to do with the financial situation, as finances is the top reason for couples to have discord.
Communication is key, here. Ask questions (avoid "why"). She'll tell you what you need to hear to gain a better understanding of her concerns if you ask the right questions. This kills two birds with one stone. It allows her to take the stage AND you're giving her attention that she feels she's lacking.
You're the guy in this relationship. You are wrong. When you accept this truth you will find peace. Embrace your ignorance. Say, "Yes, Dear."
I don't think this issue, OP, has much to do with your new hobby/habit, but rather your mate's feeling of lack of attention. It could have something to do with the financial situation, as finances is the top reason for couples to have discord.
Communication is key, here. Ask questions (avoid "why"). She'll tell you what you need to hear to gain a better understanding of her concerns if you ask the right questions. This kills two birds with one stone. It allows her to take the stage AND you're giving her attention that she feels she's lacking.
You're the guy in this relationship. You are wrong. When you accept this truth you will find peace. Embrace your ignorance. Say, "Yes, Dear."
Remember, the proper technical term for a wife or girlfriend is SWMBO (She Who Must Be Obeyed).
Everytime a package beats me home, i get a lecture from BOTH my landlord and my girlfriend who also vapes. (thanks to M E !)
at first i got away with, "i am only buying the essentials so that we have everything that we need baby!" .. and i was...at first!
... its going to be easy to throw the box from the mail away, but impossible to hide it all from my girlfriend :/
this is why i cant have nice things... because when i enjoy something too much, i cannot possibly give my GF enough attention
at least this is how she is seeing it.
any suggestions or personal experience with this?
I Love my GF, i also Love Vaping...
Remember what it says on the Back of your Man Card…
“It is Better to Ask for Forgiveness than to Beg for Permission.”
Okay, so this is basically a re-post from the "My Wife cut me off!" thread. But the sentiment rings true here as well.
So it seems this is the situation for many of you. Spouse Z complains, "this 'vaping thing' was supposed to save money (so I can buy two new pairs of shoes)". Then you say, "Honey-cakes...well...errr...uhhh...you see honey...I...I..". Sadly my friend, the debate is already lost at that point.
Someone did not set healthy boundaries to this endeavor from the start! But don't despair, its not too late to remedy that TODAY!
Walk right up to your spouse, look her in the eye and say firmly, "I have decided that my health is the most important issue right now. To remain comfortable with my vaping, I cannot save any money for the time being. I am still learning about my juices of choice, and there are some new mods on the market, and I really need a Protank." When she starts her badgering/nagging response with "BUT YOU said that you were gonna SAVE money, blah-blah-blah." You simply hold your hand up in a lordly fashion, and declare, "My health is of paramount importance, under no circumstances can I cut spending at this time. My spending must be at my smoking level expense at a minimum for the time being" Here is the sockdolager. At this moment while she is busy catching flies with her mouth hung open, walk away and return to some task as if the debate is over, for it is.
Now you can add in some other stuff if you want, or change the items involved in your 'needs', but that should stop spouse Z in their tracks. You must be careful not to leave out the important finality of the phrases "under no circumstances" or "health most important/paramount importance". Boundaries are important. They don't defend themselves! From this point forward, you simply need to maintain your boundary from future incursions.
NOTE: The spouse Z can very well be a "he" as well as the "she" from my example. I just used "she" to represent my perspective.
So it seems this is the situation for many of you. Spouse Z complains, "this 'vaping thing' was supposed to save money (so I can buy two new pairs of shoes)". Then you say, "Honey-cakes...well...errr...uhhh...you see honey...I...I..". Sadly my friend, the debate is already lost at that point.
Someone did not set healthy boundaries to this endeavor from the start! But don't despair, its not too late to remedy that TODAY!
Walk right up to your spouse, look her in the eye and say firmly, "I have decided that my health is the most important issue right now. To remain comfortable with my vaping, I cannot save any money for the time being. I am still learning about my juices of choice, and there are some new mods on the market, and I really need a Protank." When she starts her badgering/nagging response with "BUT YOU said that you were gonna SAVE money, blah-blah-blah." You simply hold your hand up in a lordly fashion, and declare, "My health is of paramount importance, under no circumstances can I cut spending at this time. My spending must be at my smoking level expense at a minimum for the time being" Here is the sockdolager. At this moment while she is busy catching flies with her mouth hung open, walk away and return to some task as if the debate is over, for it is.
Now you can add in some other stuff if you want, or change the items involved in your 'needs', but that should stop spouse Z in their tracks. You must be careful not to leave out the important finality of the phrases "under no circumstances" or "health most important/paramount importance". Boundaries are important. They don't defend themselves! From this point forward, you simply need to maintain your boundary from future incursions.
NOTE: The spouse Z can very well be a "he" as well as the "she" from my example. I just used "she" to represent my perspective.
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You just gotta make sure that she has a package delivered around the same time as yours, lol. My wife hasn't said anything but I bet if she saw all the packages that come here she might, regardless of what the cost is it LOOKS like a lot of stuff. I do make sure that if she mentions she wants something that I get it for her.
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Sent from my DROID RAZR HD using Tapatalk 2
Guess I'm lucky. My husband never really says "no" to me when I want to buy something. He's a sweetheart. When I first started vaping I did tell him a little lie when I got a vGo ...said I won it in a contest here! I wasn't even a member here, yet, but he didn't know that. He probably wouldn't have said anything about it, though. It was just my guilty conscience.
Things have changed since those days. Back then he was still working, and was the bread winner. Since then he got really sick and is now on Disability...as am I (have been for over 10 years). So anyway...our income is limited. I do all the bill paying and handle the bank account. Did the taxes when we had to do them. I've always been the one handling the money in our relationship. For 22 years now. Since he knows I tend to the bills first, and am thrifty (definitely not a clothes horse, don't care about shoes, and what's a salon? Okay..I am a bit of a sucker for jewelry though....) and budget minded he doesn't worry about what I get. We both vape, but he's very happily roosted with the eGo T Mod and while I've bought him various vaping toys to entice him to other pastures...he really isn't interested. That leaves it "open season" for me! If our bills and obligations are met, the pantry is full, our meds are taken care of, and the car is in good shape...I can buy whatever I want!
Trouble is: I AM thrifty, and something of a penny pincher and bargain hunter. Guess he knows that. We subscribe to the motto: "Choose your battles". Mostly we choose not to do battle at all.
Things have changed since those days. Back then he was still working, and was the bread winner. Since then he got really sick and is now on Disability...as am I (have been for over 10 years). So anyway...our income is limited. I do all the bill paying and handle the bank account. Did the taxes when we had to do them. I've always been the one handling the money in our relationship. For 22 years now. Since he knows I tend to the bills first, and am thrifty (definitely not a clothes horse, don't care about shoes, and what's a salon? Okay..I am a bit of a sucker for jewelry though....) and budget minded he doesn't worry about what I get. We both vape, but he's very happily roosted with the eGo T Mod and while I've bought him various vaping toys to entice him to other pastures...he really isn't interested. That leaves it "open season" for me! If our bills and obligations are met, the pantry is full, our meds are taken care of, and the car is in good shape...I can buy whatever I want!
Trouble is: I AM thrifty, and something of a penny pincher and bargain hunter. Guess he knows that. We subscribe to the motto: "Choose your battles". Mostly we choose not to do battle at all.
Sounds like you need a second job or get a better paying job or ask to work more hours IMHO 
and the women in my life love my vape gear 
btw I am a landlord.
and the women in my life love my vape gear btw I am a landlord.- Status
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