Anti-smoking Humor

[sherid]

Q. How many professional tobacco control advocates does it take to change a light bulb?
A. One to say "There is no safe way to change a light bulb."
and another twenty thousand to ask for more research.


Q. How many tobacco harm reduction advocates does it take to change a light bulb?
A. One so long as it's an FDA approved ebulb™

 

[jim420]

Q. How many professional tobacco control advocates does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. You don't need light. It's harmful and we have not researched if it causes skin cancer.

 

[ShadowDemon420]

LOL thats a good one jim funny stuff there..

 

[Amy]

Ah, thanks...I needed this. I've been very bothered lately about the anti-smoking movement, etc. I'm not in a very funny mood atm, but here's my lame attempt to contribute.

Q: Why did the anti-smoker cross the street?

A: Because there was someone smoking on the other side!

The rest of the story: He demanded that the cigarette be put out, because in 50 years he might have less than .00001 % chance of dying from one of those "smoking related illnesses" from this incident of getting into the smokers face to tell him to put out the cigarette. Afterwards, he decided to return to the other side. In route, an anti-smoker driving an SUV came flying down the road like a bat out of hell and ran him over.

The smoker was so nervous from witnessing all of this, he lit another cigarette to get some relief, which leads us to the next question - why did the SUV driving anti-smoker get out of the car? If you thought it was to go perform CPR on the anti-smoker that lay breathless in the road, you thought wrong...

 

[ShadowDemon420]

Thats a good one Amy funny stuff least were trying to get our minds off the serious crap going on in never hurts to get a laugh..

 

[chief druid]

you mean theres serious stuff going on ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

 

[ShadowDemon420]

Yeah! The SWINE FLUE! =P you know it =P

 

[chief druid]

i heard that swine flu has merged with bird flu to become flying pig flu.....

 

[LaceyUnderall]

Yeah! The SWINE FLUE! =P you know it =P

OMG - considering the thread http://www.e-cigarette-forum.com/forum/e-cigarette-news/18183-video-reports-tobacco-legislation.html you and I are both in right now...

maybe the Pig Urine in tobacco cigs is the real culprit for "swine flu"!?! (totally a joke)

 

[ShadowDemon420]

LOL Yes thats it lacy you nailed it! and you know I am not being racsist or anything but you know when the day comes to see a black man as president pigs would fly.. Well Swin Flue =P I am not trying to be raceist just saying the one joke I know =P

 

[Kendra]

^^^^

 

[Steampunk]

Does Kendra not have the best avs? Great job on your current one K!!

 

[MacZapIt]

Wooops - laughing and vaping at the same time.....Is that gonna be illegal too?

 

[Kendra]

Does Kendra not have the best avs? Great job on your current one K!!

Thank you!!

 

[jim420]

Does Kendra not have the best avs? Great job on your current one K!!

Not a bad tushie, either.

 

[chief druid]

what do you call a dog who makes a bolt for the door



a blacksmith

 

[Elendil]

Does Kendra not have the best avs? Great job on your current one K!!

She has too much time on her hands. She should get a job.

 

[Kendra]

She has too much time on her hands. She should get a job.

Um, you mean I should actually work my job, lol.

 

[TheKingOfKool]

Two old ladies were outside their nursing home, having a smoke when it started to rain. One of the ladies pulled out a condom, cut off the end, put it over her cigarette and continued smoking.

Lady 1: What's that?
Lady 2: A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet.
Lady 1: Where did you get it?
Lady 2: You can get them at any drugstore.

The next day ... Lady 1 hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms. The guy looks at her kind of strangely (she is, after all, over 80 years of age), but politely asks what brand she prefers.

Lady 1: It doesn't matter as long as it fits a Camel.

 

[TheKingOfKool]

A guy is standing on the corner of the street smoking one cigarette after another. A lady walking by notices him and says
“Hey, don’t you know that those things can kill you? I mean, didn’t you see the giant warning on the box?!”
“That’s OK” says the guy, puffing casually “I’m a computer programmer”
“So? What’s that got to do with anything?”
“We don’t care about warnings. We only care about errors.”