Feeling a Little Discouraged :(

[sapphyre]

I know I should not feel this way, but sometimes the things people say can just get to me. A couple of weeks ago, I was talking with one of my husband's coworkers about how he'd quit smoking and how proud I am of him. They said "He hasn't really quit, he's just substituted with another kind of smoking." And tonight even he said he felt like he was cheating, replacing smoking with vaping.

Now I don't necessarily share this viewpoint.

The fact is, because vaping involves no combustable material, and it is not smoke coming from the atomizer, I KNOW this isn't smoking. I also know how much better I feel, and the health benefits I am already feeling. But when someone looks you in the eye and says, "You have not really quit. You've just traded for another kind of addiction," I can't help but to feel a little guilt. I am trying very hard to overcome this.

How do you ever explain to someone that does not understand vaping what it REALLY is? I know you can't MAKE someone believe or even listen to what you have to say, but it feels very unfair to have a smoker smugly point out that you 'haven't really quit'.

Sorry for whining... Just had to get it off my chest.

 

[banjo]

Thanks for posting this. I gave up a long time ago caring about, or being affected by, anything that other people say about me and/or my choices about how I live - and I never, without being asked, give others my advice or opinions. Life is way to short to care a wit about opinions from others that I haven't solicited.

 

[Chameloid]

IMHO, there are some things that you do for yourself (and in your case, your hubby is doing it for himself) and who cares what anyone else thinks? This is why for cases like this (like what I'm doing in terms of replacing the cigs with vaping), I just casually and quietly went on and started doing it without telling anyone. If they see me with my PV and ask, I'll tell them what it is and move on. So far, after almost 5 months, almost everyone has been curious and some have been researching and/or have ordered kits.

Sadly in this world, there are folks out there who are (IMHO) so insecure that the only way to get out of their own funk of insecurity, they must somehow (whether aggressively or passive aggressively) denigrate someone else and I'm not about to become a target of their nonsense. When you call them on it, they slither away shocked and actively look for their next victim.

Don't worry about whining - just keep giving hubby all the support and encouragement in the world!

 

[sapphyre]

Many thanks banjo and Chameloid... I guess perhaps I was just letting myself feel a little down about it all. I think the funniest thing said to date was when I held out my 510 as an offering to a long time acquaintance and smoker... "No thanks, I prefer my nicotine." I just about died laughing.

Maybe if I remind myself and my husband what smoking REALLY is, we'll both be able to feel better about it when ignorance rears its ugly head.

 

[andygee]

I agree with chameloid. Some people just need to be told to pound sand, you know? There's a World Health Organization report somewhere that lists smoking as the hardest thing in the world to give up; print that out and carry it around with you!

I reserve the right to sit around and plug myself in and suck on these things like a mental patient should I so desire.

 

[debb]

yep.....i decided when i vape ..and someone doesn't like it....OH WELL.....i am going to vape..and ignore people that have something to say...vaping has saved me....so they can go pound sand....

 

[Liv2Ski]

Sapphyre - I have found you can not fight stupid with logic. Stupid always wins. Who cares what they think. You have done your research and they have not. Vape on

 

[757girl]

I have told people to K.M.A (figure this out lol) when they STILL want to grill you about what you choose to do. Just keep your head up and read some of the success stories people have posted. Stick to this forum..the support system is here whenever you need to vent.

 

[Jim211]

Don't care about what others think sapphyre. I know my health is better since i started vaping and I'm sure you know it too, and thats all that really matters.

 

[sapphyre]

I am VERY grateful for such a strong base of support! Thank you all very very much!

 

[debb]

yep...ecf is a great support system....i was so surprised when i joined....such great people here...

 

[WillieB69]

I've had the "you haven't really quit" thing thrown in my face a few times. You know what? So what? They're entitled to their opinion and I am just as entitled to disagree with them. I tried, gum, lozenges, patches and drugs. They all sucked. Then I found vaping and I couldn't be happier. Ultimately, I traded an addiction that was slowly killing me and those around me for something that I truly enjoy and keeps me from climbing into the bell tower with a sniper's rifle. If they can't deal with that, screw 'em.

 

[Vchick]

I've said it recently in a commentary to a Ann Arbor newspaper article........

When a non-smoker is willing to take Chantix and experience what I have and continue to experience 2 years later with respect to the changes that occur in the brain, then I'll respect their opinion, or discuss their views.

Then there are the others, who don't have the sense of reason or a open mind......to those I say, SEEEEE YA!

 

[WomanOfHeart]

Two rather snarky things come to mind; You can't have a battle of the wits with an unarmed person, and you just can't fix stupid.

We had a friend come over the other night who made a similar remark ("You didn't really quit smoking, you just found a different way to get your nicotine.") While I can understand where his statement is partially true, it misses the point and just comes off as ignorant. I countered by saying "So, if we were using using the gum or the patch, how would that be any different?"

 

[coralie]

I get this response sometimes too, almost always from current or former smokers. Non smokers who know me are just happy for me that I've quit and they know it took me a long time to do, even with vaping. I know I shouldn't let the negative response affect me, but it does. I think sometimes smokers that I know feel pressure from me to quit although I don't give it, smokers are harangued from every angle to quit and just seeing me vaping makes them feel the same pressure. Strangers usually don't seem affected, they say nothing to me. Even if they did, their opinion wouldn't matter much to me. Hang in there. Come here often for support. Vaping is better, you've done the research, your husband feels the difference. Quitting smoking can be really hard no matter what path one takes to master it. Try to shrug it off and when you can't, know that you are always welcome to come vent and be supported here.

 

[BuzzKill]

its gets really funny when they are smoking a cig and tell you that !! , I just give them my favorite finger and move on !

 

[debb]

its gets really funny when they are smoking a cig and tell you that !! , I just give them my favorite finger and move on !

 

[Sainted_S]

LOL,,,liked that response buzzkill.

Truthfully I still consider myself a smoker, just not nasty tobacco and when I get the comment, "You haven't really quit, if you couldn't do that electric cigarette thing you'd be out there buying a pack." I agree with the wholeheartedly (though I am beginning to question myself whether I would or not) and say "Oh yeah, most definitely I would buy a pack, but as long as I have these I never will go back to those. They smell horrid, I had no idea how badly I smelled when I was smoking them, and I can buy a new kit every month with enough juice for the month and not even come close to what I spent on cigarettes. I'm glad you like spending your money, I don't"

I mean it depends on the tone, but if they are mocking, I mock them right back.

 

[martha1014]

I was recently in the hospital and used my ecig constantly. No one ever mentioned any smell and only one nurse asked me what is was. I told her it was an electronic cigarette and she said she had heard of them. First off you are not allowed to smoke in a hospital and if I was smoking a cigarette everybody would know. This is completely different from smoking a cigarette.

 

[hairball]

Mom and Dad smoked for as long as I can remember. Both quit using patches. I told Dad about my electronic cigarette adventures and how well it was doing for me. He told me that I just need to quit. I laughed and said, "Just like you and Mom did? Just throw them in the trash? I believe you two quit using patches which is great that they worked for you!" I was being smug about it. He didn't give me an answer but handed the phone to Mom. LOL...I figured he would do that. I told Mom about it. I got a different response. Instead of throw them away, it was "Great that you finally are trying something." Mom and Dad still light up in casinos. The next time I visit and we go gambling, I plan on taking some plain low nic tobacco juice, loading up an ecig, and when Dad goes to light a cig, cramming the ecig in his face and telling him to give it a try. I can't wait to see his reaction. I'm going to tell him not to bash something that works for someone else. It's not considered smoking since nothing is being combusted. Don't get me wrong, Dad's a loveable clown but maybe I can get his stance to change about what other people do.

Don't let what someone else tells you, get you down. You've come along way. Be proud of that. If a smoker said this to you, it may be jealousy that you are doing better than they are and that they are too scared to try it. I was like that at first, when I tried quitting the hard way. I told people that when I started again, that I loved to smoke. I missed it. Bottom line, no I didn't. I hated myself because I couldn't put the darn things down. Vaping is a life saver for us. Don't let what people say discourage you. Happy Vaping!