feeling guilty

[Ryan Kelly]

so i got into vaping because my girlfriend hated that i smoked and begged me to at least try to quit using an e cig so we went to a loacla B&M months and months ago and i got a starter kit. I've come a long way since then. about a week ago she came down to visit me (she lives in MA). she never smoked or anything aside from an occasional hookah session but ever since i got into vaping and started getting mods and stuff she just really enjoys it herself. she constantly asks me to use my stuff when were together and uses a lot of my juice so i decided to give her a little setup of her own. i gave her my ego twist battery (1200 mah) with a kanger aerotank mini. then we went to the vape shop and got extra coils and a bunch of juice. i got her really stocked up because she doesn't really know what to ask for if she were to go to a B&M near her. ever since she got her little setup that thing has been in her mouth 24/7 (turn your dirty minds off people hahaha). every time i look over there is a cloud of vapor in front of her face. at first i was delighted that me and my girlfriend share a common interest. but now that she is back home and tells me that she vapes all the time i am starting to feel bad about my decision to set her up with a vape. she never smoked a cigarette in her life and unlike me is truly a model citizen. never does anything bad. i know that vaping isn't as addictive as smokes but she vapes 6mg nic juices so I'm worried its going to have effects on her. I've talked to her about getting 0 nic juice but she says she likes the throat hit from the nicotine. i don't know. i know vaping is relatively safe i just feel bad. like i got a smudge on a 1,000,000 dollar painting. any opinions?

 

[Amraann]

Yes, I have an opinion.......

She is an adult and therefore responsible for her own choices. It is not like you got her started smoking real cigs. If she enjoys vaping 6mg I do not see the problem.
You did not make her do anything.
I have read many of your posts and you seem like a very considerate nice guy. Do not over think this or feel guilty for what another adult chooses to do.

 

[PrimeKB]

Yes, I have an opinion.......

She is an adult and therefore responsible for her own choices. It is not like you got her started smoking real cigs. If she enjoys vaping 6mg I do not see the problem.
You did not make her do anything.
I have read many of your posts and you seem like a very considerate nice guy. Do not over think this or feel guilty for what another adult chooses to do.

I agree with this. In the end it is her decision. Just tell her how you feel about her vaping the 6mg and if she still wants to continue doing it, let her. You have no reason to feel bad or guilty. I like to think of myself as a considerable guy but I've unfortunately gotten people started on real cigarettes back when I use to smoke, but I don't let it bother me. It was their choice to make. I've never been the pressuring type.

 

[GolemGolem]

I had the same thing happen with my wife, though she doesn't vape constantly, and yeah 6mg for her too.
I feel a little guilty too, not guilty like if she started smoking, but still.
She's stubborn, once she made up her mind to get a kit there really wasn't much I could do about it except to make sure it was an ok kit and she kept the nic as low as possible.

 

[keepsmiling]

We are all responsible for our own actions.

 

[jdrewry]

Like anything in life, tell her not to overdo it; moderation is a good thing, especially if she's vaping as much as you say she is.

 

[GinnyTx]

So I'm not a "model" citizen because I smoked?

as I tell my young adult kiddos (ages 20 & 25) Y'all are grown [Moderated] adults and therefore responsible for your decisions (and those consequences especially when they don't listen to my advice *lol*)


Playing the shame and blame game is counterproductive to any relationship, it'll build guilt on your part and potentially resentment on hers (as she'll no doubt pick up on that) ok she's addicted to nicotine there's worse things...y'all kiddos vape on and be joyous in each other, that's what matters ...really.

 

[Nick N]

Shoot, I started vaping 0mg to support my Wife who still smokes for the most part (I roll her "pipe tobacco" cigarettes everyday). I don't pressure her to put them down, it is her choice. I haven't smoked for 12 years and don't plan to.

I find it relaxing and very social. As an added benefit I have lost my sweet tooth and have noticed a change for the better at the waistline.

I have better equipment and have been more consistent with it than she has. I have embraced it as a hobby, similar to car audio and Android software modifications from my past (OK I still flash Android ROMs).

I wouldn't worry about it too much. Maybe she just enjoys the flavors and enjoys blowing clouds. A lot of us do.

 

[Tangaroav]

We are responsible for the exemple we give to our kids/grand kids, loved ones and sometimes our subordinates. But it is not constructive to dwell on it too much.

 

[faile]

Two things:

1- Nicotine outside of cigarettes (burning tobacco, etc) is about as harmful as caffiene. Would you feel bad if you'd gotten her started drinking coffee?

2- What Amraann said:

Yes, I have an opinion.......

She is an adult and therefore responsible for her own choices. *snip* Do not over think this or feel guilty for what another adult chooses to do.

 

[HauntedMyst]

Ok, I'll be the dissenting opinion and say that you, Ryan Kelly, are a horrible person. Getting that sweet young girl hooked...nay, addicted to vaping? How long before she is on the streets selling herself for her next 15ml bottle of juice, ALL BECAUSE OF YOU RYAN KELLY! ALL BECAUSE OF YOU!!! May whatever god you believe in have mercy on your soul.

 

[WharfRat1976]

In a codependent enabling relationship, ahem, no one is responsible for anything[emoji16]

 

[bluecat]

The woman who was friends with my wife and how I met my wife vapes because of me. She ohh that smells good can I try? I said, sure but told it contained nicotine. In a week she had her own stuff and 0 nic. I mix her DIY 200 ml at a time. She is an adult and can make her own decision in life. I do not feel guilty or responsible. Besides what right do I have of telling any one (except my kids) what they can and cannot do?

Think of it this way. If she asks you for a beer or a glass of wine are you going to tell her no because she may become an alcoholic?

 

[Tinkiegrrl]

Just as adults do when they make the decision to start smoking, some will make the decision to start vaping. I'm in no position to knock them with 16 years of smoking a pack and a half a day under my belt. Your girlfriend is an adult OP, and capable of making her own decisions. You have nothing to be guilty about. She wanted to try it, she liked it, she continues to do it. Unless she follows your every command (eew) you were merely the vehicle through which she satisfied her own curiosity.

 

[DC2]

I think it would be very interesting to see if she actually gets addicted.
But I'd be willing to be that she isn't going to.