I'm sorry. I actually giggled when I read that. I know I should be more sympathetic instead of giggling.
Seriously though, does anybody actually know anyone the patch has worked for? I never tried it myself, but only because I've known too many people who have tried it.
Remember that Disney movie "Dumbo"? The elephant thought he couldn't fly (even though he could!) so the mouse gave him a "magic feather" to make him fly.... IMO, that's like the patch. If you CAN quit cold turkey on your own, the patch gives you the confidence to do so... But for the rest of us its just $50 (or more) down the toilet.