These are not even going to sound like believable stories, but I promise they are. These are literally from this last week.
I had to let the same employee go yesterday.
She (this is key) was touching customers in inappropriate ways while helping them. Think self pleasure but on someone else. I had to ask her kindly to stop doing that. Especially while the customers GF was sitting and watching.
Same employee was not feeling well on wednesday of last week and told my other employees it was because she had a contraceptive device (one that men use. you can piece this together for yourself) stuck inside of her. She was planning on taking care of the issue on friday. Please note the timeline. Happened on monday, she was planning on taking care of it on friday!!! We send her to emergency care to take care of it that day.
This is my life. I hope this makes you feel a little better. I am SURE you do not have these issues.