First, let me start by saying that vaping saved my life, helped me quit coffin nails when nothing else could.
Second, let me add that I love vaping. I love the flavor...the calorie free dessert as I lounge in bed with a good book at night or spill my guts on my blog or write an amazing Slam poem that might get me in good in the competition.
But I am also so over this. Charging batteries, battery chargers taking up space in the power strips, bottles of juice, juice i invested money in but hate, dripping while driving, dripping while lounging, changing out evod coils, failed tanks, leaky tanks, used coils on the living room table, devices that were expensive but sit unused (A K100, iHybrid, several evod batteries of various sizes and colors), running out of coils, running out of juice, trips to the local b&m, waiting on vapemail, buyers remorse for that new atty that i didn't need but had to have, well-earned money spent on gear that does exactly what that other piece of gear did, sneaking hits off my vape at work, counting minutes until my next vape break, feeling panic if i forget my device or battery or juice or coils at home, spilled juice in my purse or my backpack or on the seat of my new car, actually weighing the option of buying more juice or lunch, realizing that I could afford that much-needed physician -prescribed meditation class for $300.00 that will lower my blood pressure and help me manage my bipolar and anxiety and PTSD with less meds if I didn't just spend that same amount on a new atty, juice, and evod coils "because I had the money and it was instant retail therapy."
I've lowered my nicotine levels to 4 mg, can't justify spending money on zero nicotine that truly just makes me frustrated chasing a throat hit with coil-burning wattage (or voltage...I never could get that straight after a year of vaping).
I'm posting my gear on Craigslist today at close to nothing just to try to recoup some of the $2000.00 or more that I have spent on gear in the past few months, not to mention the hundreds of dollars in glam juice and disposable coils.
I am posting this mostly for me...I had to see it all in writing. And I am posting it in case someone else is approaching the same fork in the road. It happens. We just don't hear about it under the drone of media buzz over banning or restricting or criminalizing e-digs, none of which, by the way, do I agree with or support in any way, shape or form.
I have just come to realize that vaping, FOR ME (not saying in general) was the harmless affair that got me out of the abusive and nearly fatal marriage I had with cigarettes. (Kind of like the real life friendship that delivered me from RL domestic abuse so I can not feel like a schmuck using such a comparison).
Yes, I will keep my evod C, one evod tank and a bottle of juice "just in case" I reach a point of rebellion/withdrawal/panic/nostalgia.... But today, when I go to work, I am leaving my gear and juice in my big black box o' vape stuff and taking lots of water in a sports bottle that has a nipple just for the oral fixation. I don't know how successful I will be, but am hoping for the best.
I'm just so over this.
Please, no flames...I struggle with so many other things that society doesn't get and hope that some of you here will understand. I just needed to voice this.
Thanks for listening.
