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Sambuca

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Jul 23, 2013
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I wish I could share my heart with you. I'm sorry but what you're mother said is just cruel.

not to worry, catbird! mental illness runs in my family, we're all bi-polar with pretty dark depression. most of the women i know are men haters. my mom expects me to be some kind of saintly human being because of that. (it's OK, cuz i'm kind of known as that around here. most folks refer to me as a priest or a rabbi.) my mom is not responsible for the way she reacts about me. my dad screwed her over and she sees a lot of him in me. i'm not just getting the hate, it's really her wanting me to be better than him and the rest. i know i can never meet her expectations, so i set my own standards pretty high. you get use to women being cruel to you, especially if you can understand why. it took me a long time to understand my mom (my little brother, who only got a portion of the abuse, committed suicide).

i'm lucky in that i got to spend 15 years of my life helping folks, first at a union, and the last 8 years as a Hopelink driver. the Hopelink job payed crap, but i thought that helping folks was a good way to make a living. long story short, i learned so much and met so many people i was known as one of the best. thanks to my 3rd wife, we got the company to start considering the "safety' of their clients instead of just "covering their a$$es" all the time. a large portion of the women they transport, suffer from PTSD. no one had bothered to figure out why it was that these women acted "irrationally" at times. actually, no one cared, they just didn't want complaints. screw that, my work at the union had me pretty comfortable with the ADA. these women have rights, dammit! i wasable to get the VP of the company to try to get the CSRs to try to understand this and make accommodations that took this, and other forms of depression into consideration when trying to resolve issues.

it was always heartbreaking when people would thank me, out of the blue. i'd asked what for, and the answer used to slay me, "for treating us like human beings". :cry:

that was supposed to be our job, for crying out loud! i had a standard comeback, "well, other than service animals, that's the only species we transport". i got to teach people their rights and i would help them prep for meetings when some "facilities" were not treating them properly and were going to punish them for something stupid.

my boss was an ......, though. he'd pay us for 8-10 hours and make us work 13-14. we had a lot of screaming matches. i remember one time, he had just gotten over being pi$$ed at me. he said, "(Sam), you have to stop doing the right thing". i couldn't believe not only that he said it, but that he thought it was a rational thing to say! :facepalm:

heart disease runs in my family as well as mental illness. i never, ever thought i be alive this long. every day is just one more opportunity to try to do something good. half a heart is better than less, and you can still do a lot with it! ;)
 

Sambuca

Ultra Member
ECF Veteran
Jul 23, 2013
2,947
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Albuquerque
Happy New Years!!!Ordering more in 2 days..I was shocked when I heard my not yet Vaping friends mention mt baker ;) trying to convince them to proceed w the SVD they wanted to order.. Anyways CHEERS!!
(Newbie...started Vaping nov 18)

Sent from my HTC One using Tapatalk

you know there's a sale today, right?

coupon code: CELEVAPE2014

morning Ralph!
 
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catbird

Full Member
Aug 5, 2012
43
166
CA
not to worry, catbird! mental illness runs in my family, we're all bi-polar with pretty dark depression. most of the women i know are men haters. my mom expects me to be some kind of saintly human being because of that. (it's OK, cuz i'm kind of known as that around here. most folks refer to me as a priest or a rabbi.) my mom is not responsible for the way she reacts about me. my dad screwed her over and she sees a lot of him in me. i'm not just getting the hate, it's really her wanting me to be better than him and the rest. i know i can never meet her expectations, so i set my own standards pretty high. you get use to women being cruel to you, especially if you can understand why. it took me a long time to understand my mom (my little brother, who only got a portion of the abuse, committed suicide).

i'm lucky in that i got to spend 15 years of my life helping folks, first at a union, and the last 8 years as a Hopelink driver. the Hopelink job payed crap, but i thought that helping folks was a good way to make a living. long story short, i learned so much and met so many people i was known as one of the best. thanks to my 3rd wife, we got the company to start considering the "safety' of their clients instead of just "covering their a$$es" all the time. a large portion of the women they transport, suffer from PTSD. no one had bothered to figure out why it was that these women acted "irrationally" at times. actually, no one cared, they just didn't want complaints. screw that, my work at the union had me pretty comfortable with the ADA. these women have rights, dammit! i wasable to get the VP of the company to try to get the CSRs to try to understand this and make accommodations that took this, and other forms of depression into consideration when trying to resolve issues.

it was always heartbreaking when people would thank me, out of the blue. i'd asked what for, and the answer used to slay me, "for treating us like human beings". :cry:

that was supposed to be our job, for crying out loud! i had a standard comeback, "well, other than service animals, that's the only species we transport". i got to teach people their rights and i would help them prep for meetings when some "facilities" were not treating them properly and were going to punish them for something stupid.

my boss was an ......, though. he'd pay us for 8-10 hours and make us work 13-14. we had a lot of screaming matches. i remember one time, he had just gotten over being pi$$ed at me. he said, "(Sam), you have to stop doing the right thing". i couldn't believe not only that he said it, but that he thought it was a rational thing to say! :facepalm:

heart disease runs in my family as well as mental illness. i never, ever thought i be alive this long. every day is just one more opportunity to try to do something good. half a heart is better than less, and you can still do a lot with it! ;)
Sorry you are going through this. I have nothing to do with my immediate family. But I have a cool aunt and cousin on the other side of the country.
 
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