Relapse and Redemption

[carto-mizer]

I was a "Roll Your Own" analog smoker for many decades. I've been off the analogs and strictly vaping for almost 6 months, 2nd time around. Broke down last night and bought a package of Bali Shag. I smoked three total. The odd thing was that even smoking the analogs did not satiate the desire. I smoked the three one after another. It was almost like smoking them made the desire to smoke even stronger without a moment's relief. It seems that when you take the physical element out of the addiction equation (nicotine), the issues of addiction remain very complex and emotionally rooted. I think we heap other issues onto that desire, in a similar fashion to the way any frustration can lead back to smoking - like when someone cuts you off on the highway and you say "damn it, enough's enough, I'm smoking!"

 

[kyaku]

It's OK! I've done that a couple of times. Then reflected on why I lit up a cig when it doesn't do a thing for me anymore. And it went so fast! Seemed like I only spent a minute smoking that cig before it was gone and I was NOT satisfied.
Now every time one of those little cravings come, I just think back to the last time I smoked and I remember ... my PV is better.

 

[beckah54]

Did the tobacco still taste good to you carto-mizer? The reason I don't smoke tobacco anymore is because it tastes nasty. Maybe the flavoring in the ecig causes regular cigarettes to taste bad, I don't know. I used to love the taste of the first cigarette of the day

 

[Thank You]

As long as you realize what you've done is 'wrong' and still look to 'correct' it.. You're ok in my book.

At the end of the day no ones perfect and no one here should be quick to judge.

 

[carto-mizer]

Did the tobacco still taste good to you carto-mizer? The reason I don't smoke tobacco anymore is because it tastes nasty. Maybe the flavoring in the ecig causes regular cigarettes to taste bad, I don't know. I used to love the taste of the first cigarette of the day

I thought it would be delicious, but it just tasted familiar.

Kyaku - That was it precisely - smoking did nothing to satiate the desire to smoke.

 

[wdave]

I was a "Roll Your Own" analog smoker for many decades. I've been off the analogs and strictly vaping for almost 6 months, 2nd time around. Broke down last night and bought a package of Bali Shag. I smoked three total. The odd thing was that even smoking the analogs did not satiate the desire. I smoked the three one after another. It was almost like smoking them made the desire to smoke even stronger without a moment's relief. It seems that when you take the physical element out of the addiction equation (nicotine), the issues of addiction remain very complex and emotionally rooted. I think we heap other issues onto that desire, in a similar fashion to the way any frustration can lead back to smoking - like when someone cuts you off on the highway and you say "damn it, enough's enough, I'm smoking!"

Don't take abstinence so seriously. Focus on how much better you breathe.
HTH,
Dave

 

[Sandrita]

Hmm whenever I end up having a cigarette which is rarely and probably about 6 months now. I really do NOT enjoy it and end up throwing half away it reminds me of having my first cigarettes when i was 15! I must of been stupid if I kept it doing again and again though!!!!