Stood my ground

[TheEmperorOfIceCream]

This one's for the e-smokers based in London, UK - or those of you who may be visiting anytime soon. Out for a few beers tonight in the Paxtons Head, Knightsbridge, and puffing away on my brand new (like, first cartridge) njoy. I got called by the barmaid to pack it in because she 'could smell it'. She was across the bar, maybe fifteen feet from where I was sitting so I knew it was balls. Blew her a kiss and a smoke ring. It was a corporate shindig so we were getting table service and the next time she came around I showed her my njoy card. I also had the njoy brochure with me, which has a neat cutaway illo of the penstyle and I showed her that also. She was totally cool about me chugging away after that.

So let me start the ball rolling on the UK list of 'OK-to-vape' places (until we get our chit together and hand out stickies like Katink told us).

Smokey Joe, is it OK to post links to places that let us e-smoke? If not, feel free to delete the link below.

Also, I scored with the barmaid - not the manager. Even so, worth noting.

Emp

http://www.beerintheevening.com/pubs/s/ ... ghtsbridge

 

[dnakr]

by TheEmperorOfIceCream

This one's for the e-smokers based in London, UK

I may be from the United States and may never get to the UK to visit but just had to say, great job.

Rachel

 

[leaford]

Also, I scored with the barmaid - not the manager. Even so, worth noting.

Heh. He-heh. He said, "score." He. Heh-heh!

Sorry, I channelled Beavis and Buthead for a minute.

 

[dc2k08]

....and the next time she came around I showed her my Njoy card. I also had the Njoy brochure with me, which has a neat cutaway illo of the penstyle and I showed her that also. She was totally cool about me chugging away after that.

hi emp, nice story...i was wondering if you could scan in a copy of that card or let me know what it says cause i have been looking for a nice concise way to explain e-cigs to bar tenders etc. your post is proof that this njoy card does a good job..all i got with a generic penstyle with an hilariously translated instruction manual from chinese to english.

thanks
dc

 

[Klaue]

i was wondering if you could scan in a copy of that card or let me know what it says cause i have been looking for a nice concise way to explain e-cigs to bar tenders etc.

See here: njoy-review-t83.html
last picture of the first post

 

[jamie]

Went into a place yesterday and while passing the bar, casually told the bartender, "Oh, just wanted to let you know I've got a nicotine inhaler... so if you think I'm smoking, I'm not." She said, "Okay, thanks." And all was well.

I'm sure that won't always do the job, however using a known word (inhaler) and being polite and relaxed about it signals to them that it isn't a big deal, nothing to concern themselves with. Along with appreciating the polite person who acknowledged their job.

I got called by the barmaid to pack it in because she 'could smell it'.

That "can smell it," crap.... I hope she had the grace to be embarrassed caught out on her blatant lie, but probably not. Did she wave her hands in front of her face and pretend to cough too? :roll: Sounds like you were kinder than I would have been in that particular circumstance. Good for you.

 

[TheEmperorOfIceCream]

I'm being (sorta) polite about it because I'm not going to let this go. I only realised how crippling the social exclusion was since I started e-smoking. Basically we've all been sneered at, spat on, condescended to and treated like pariah dogs. Friends of mine (hah!) have given me a hard time about smoking in their bloody gardens. I never said anything in my defence because I was clearly a selfish git trying to murder them and their children.

Haven't things changed, though? I was puffing away in the same couple's company the other day and I could see them trying to come up with a way to give me a hard time about it.

Killjoys will not easily tolerate our ongoing consumption of nicotine. After all the trouble they went to sticking it to us about secondhand smoke, pollution, "the children" etc, it's downright galling to have to watch us enjoying a leisurely, relaxing smoke after dinner. And this time the science is on our side!

I carry the NJOY brochure around with me, I've memorised all the stats and I'll yak down a bar full of iceholes every time.

I've decided to light up in public places, including bars, without asking permission or explaining myself. We're not doing anything wrong and if people jump to conclusions I'm happy to put them straight - at excruciating length.

What I'm aiming at is to upset the invincible surety of these nimrods. I expect most of them will walk right into it just like the barmaid, who had no problem shouting at me across a crowded bar - impregnable moral high ground, see?

Well, it's not that impregnable any more. Let's hope onlookers will think twice in future before ranting at complete strangers.

Who knows, it might even work...

Emp

BTW, thanks Klaue for posting the picture link for dc2k08 as I don't have a scanner at the mo

 

[TheEmperorOfIceCream]

I had a good one at my local station yesterday. I was down at the end of the platform, a hundred yards away from anybody, out in the open air, puffing away as usual. For our broader readership, the ban in the UK is based on enclosed or part-enclosed spaces but the rail companies decided to extend the ban to their entire premises, including open platforms, bridges and car parks. This is contrary to the spirit of the law, but their by-laws allow it. Saves a few quid on the cleaning and generally spiffies up the environment.

Anyway, some nimrod called me out on the tannoy, just like Winston Smith when he was slacking on his PT in 1984.

"Will the customer on platform 3 please stop smoking IMMEDIATELY"

We get a lot of mindless drivel over the tannoy so I didn't get it the first time. I got the feedback howl on the repeat, though:

"customeronplatform3stopsmokingNOW!!"

So I clue in he's talkin' ta me, and go all Travis Bickle.

Well, okay, I didn't buy loads of guns, shave my head, kick in the control booth door and fill him full of lead, but I did start pointing at my chest, looking around and saying "well, there's nobody else here. Who the feck do you think you're talkin' to?"

All the while, of course, I'm still puffing away. Next minute, this guy appears in the distance, sprinting towards me. Well, waddling - he was carrying quite a load. We don't work these Network Southeast wallahs hard enough, if you ask me.

He eventually made it to where I was standing.

"Gaaaah - no- uuurrrrrrrggghhh - smoking - companypremises - whuurrrkk - £80 fine - hraawwwkkk."

I'd say that was a forty-a-day cough, right there. Thankfully it was a new battery and a fresh cart. So I took a big chug and blew a fat smoke ring at him. Being outside, it didn't hold together long, but long enough for my favourite line in these circumstances:

"I don't smoke, mate."

That took what little breath he was getting away. But he recovered enough to say:

"Put it out! Smoking is not allowed on railway property!"
He was getting a bit Basil Fawlty by this time and hopping from foot to foot. I think he was about ready to try and snatch it from me. Bad idea, given the cost of these things.

I didn't want to get into that so I took a puff and 'put it out' on my cheek. He went bug-eyed (I love doing that).

I was all ready for the rest of the argument (worked out what to do in this situation weeks ago) but unfortunately my train arrived at that point. Shame. Should have let it go and carried on with the row. I could see the guy weighing up whether to drag me off the train (I was still puffing away) but he came to the conclusion that it was someone else's problem from there on in.

I'm pretty sure the guy was a smoker. Pity he was also a small-minded jobsworth gagging to (attempt to) exercise his sliver of authority - I could've put him on to a good thing.

Emp

 

[luffy]

Oh that's bloody superb!
Well done emp for standing your ground.Wonder if anyone got it on camera?!

 

[Kit]

Just heard that Emp has been cast to play him self in new movie deal,
which see's him fighting for the right to e-smoke and to stand his ground when confronted by killjoys, and blow smoke rings in there face's which causes all kinds of problems for are hero...!
The movie is set for release next year and is rumored that it will be a box office smash !
The Emperor Of The Ice Cream Stars in....................

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .NO ONE CAN STOP HIM ! (18)

 

[TheEmperorOfIceCream]

I ain't doing it, Kit. They won't let my public e-smoke in the cinemas...

 

[Spider]

Haha good one Kit!

Nice work Emp! I love the stories, wish I'd been there.

This is the thing though, does it matter whether you have a realistic looking cigarette style e-cig or not when everyone assumes you're smoking a real cigarette anyway. After all, the barmaid was so certain it was a real cig she could even smell it.

People are gonna look at e-cigs and see tobacco cigarettes anyway unless we put flashing lights all of the bloody things!

Silly really.

 

[Kit]

I think your battles with the killjoys is brilliant storytelling emp very funny

 

[TropicalBob]

Wonderful story .. and art.

But can you imagine this chap telling his friends about the encounter at the (no smoking) pub. "The guy was like The Terminator, people, the kind of guy who put cigarettes out on his face! So here I was, without backup, trying to enforce this law ..."

 

[MacFan]

I had a good one at my local station yesterday. I was down at the end of the platform, a hundred yards away from anybody, out in the open air, puffing away as usual. For our broader readership, the ban in the UK is based on enclosed or part-enclosed spaces but the rail companies decided to extend the ban to their entire premises, including open platforms, bridges and car parks. This is contrary to the spirit of the law, but their by-laws allow it. Saves a few quid on the cleaning and generally spiffies up the environment.

Anyway, some nimrod called me out on the tannoy, just like Winston Smith when he was slacking on his PT in 1984.

"Will the customer on platform 3 please stop smoking IMMEDIATELY"

We get a lot of mindless drivel over the tannoy so I didn't get it the first time. I got the feedback howl on the repeat, though:

"customeronplatform3stopsmokingNOW!!"

So I clue in he's talkin' ta me, and go all Travis Bickle.

Well, okay, I didn't buy loads of guns, shave my head, kick in the control booth door and fill him full of lead, but I did start pointing at my chest, looking around and saying "well, there's nobody else here. Who the feck do you think you're talkin' to?"

All the while, of course, I'm still puffing away. Next minute, this guy appears in the distance, sprinting towards me. Well, waddling - he was carrying quite a load. We don't work these Network Southeast wallahs hard enough, if you ask me.

He eventually made it to where I was standing.

"Gaaaah - no- uuurrrrrrrggghhh - smoking - companypremises - whuurrrkk - £80 fine - hraawwwkkk."

I'd say that was a forty-a-day cough, right there. Thankfully it was a new battery and a fresh cart. So I took a big chug and blew a fat smoke ring at him. Being outside, it didn't hold together long, but long enough for my favourite line in these circumstances:

"I don't smoke, mate."

That took what little breath he was getting away. But he recovered enough to say:

"Put it out! Smoking is not allowed on railway property!"
He was getting a bit Basil Fawlty by this time and hopping from foot to foot. I think he was about ready to try and snatch it from me. Bad idea, given the cost of these things.

I didn't want to get into that so I took a puff and 'put it out' on my cheek. He went bug-eyed (I love doing that).

I was all ready for the rest of the argument (worked out what to do in this situation weeks ago) but unfortunately my train arrived at that point. Shame. Should have let it go and carried on with the row. I could see the guy weighing up whether to drag me off the train (I was still puffing away) but he came to the conclusion that it was someone else's problem from there on in.

I'm pretty sure the guy was a smoker. Pity he was also a small-minded jobsworth gagging to (attempt to) exercise his sliver of authority - I could've put him on to a good thing.

Emp

Emp, you should have put it out on HIS cheek

 

[luffy]

Wonderful story .. and art.

But can you imagine this chap telling his friends about the encounter at the (no smoking) pub. "The guy was like The Terminator, people, the kind of guy who put cigarettes out on his face! So here I was, without backup, trying to enforce this law ..."

I love this place...very funny TB

 

[Kit]

I love this place...very funny TB

funniest thread of today thats for sure

 

[Evil Santa]

Fantastically Brilliant.

I keep using my e-cig in movie theaters, and while i do cover the red light to not distract other patrons.. I am waiting for the time when a person behind me taps me on the shoulder and says, "Hey Bud, No smoking in here."

Ah.. It shall be marvelous!

 

[Spider]

I think we all wait for those moments - Emp seems to get enough of them for everyone! But then he is very blatant about it

 

[Kit]

I think we all wait for those moments - Emp seems to get enough of them for everyone! But then he is very blatant about it

Emp loves the attraction he like nothing better than to say to the offended kill joy i dont smoke and blow a big fat ring in there face, smoke ring that is lol