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[The Ocelot]

chit chat

I dunno. Why are there "Yo Mama" jokes? I was born blonde and I have a blonde cousin. Her name is Bambi (for real) and we both laugh at the jokes.

 

[rosesense]

chit chat
But LH, you are a 'greenhead' so?? jk lol

 

[The Ocelot]

chit chat - Dear LH, I fixed the joke just for you

 

[lettucehead]

chit chat - Dear LH, I fixed the joke just for you

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

That is AWESOME!



Though it should have been a BLONDE brain surgeon.

 

[The Ocelot]

2)
What color is Napoleon white horse, black or brown?





It doesn't matter, it's dead.

 

[lettucehead]

9/28

Early Morning Joke
1)

The top toothbrush salesman at the company was asked by his boss how he managed to sell so many brushes.
He replied "It's easy" and he pulled out his card table, setting his display of brushes on top.
He told his boss, I lay the brushes out like this, and then I put out some potato chips and dip to draw in the customers.
He laid out his chips and dip.
His boss said, "That's a very innovative approach" and took one of the chips, dipped it, and stuck it in his mouth.
"Yuck, this tastes terrible!" his boss yelled.
The salesman replied "IT IS! Want to buy a toothbrush?"

 

[gogoplata]

9/28

1. A three year old walked over to a pregnant lady while waiting with his mother in the doctors office.

He inquisitively ask the lady, "Why is your stomach so big?"
She replied, "I'm having a baby."

With big eyes, he asked, "Is the baby in your stomach?"
She said, "He sure is."

Then the little boy, with a puzzled look, asked, "Is it a good baby?"
She said, "Oh, yes. It's a real good baby."

With an even more surprised and shocked look, he asked...
"Then why did you eat him?"

 

[paulbald2]

#1)Q. What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?

A. A nervous wreck

 

[paulbald2]

chit chat: I was hoping someone would have posted a few more joke's before this was over.Then I could have gotten a few more in.Good Luck everyone!!

 

[The Ocelot]

3) (It's still 9/27 where I am)

Did you know that you can't lick your elbow?

Why did you just try?

 

[glassmanoak]

1

Yo Momma’s so fat, she need help to open her eyelids.


.......... missed the time

 

[glassmanoak]

2
Yo Momma so dumb, she went to the police to complain a parked car hit her


Man. I blew the time of day AND double posted

 

[paulbald2]

#2) Q. Why do chicken coops have two door's?

A. Because if it had four door's it would be a chicken sedan.

 

[gogoplata]

2. A man and a woman go to the carnival every year. Every time the man says,"Anna can we ride them airplanes that goes up for a couple of minutes then comes back down?"

The woman always replied by saying,"We don`t need to spend any extra money on them airplanes,its to expensive.Ten dollars is ten dollars.

Tom, the pilot, said," Larry, every year I hear you say you want to ride my airplanes, and every year Anna says it`s too expensive. I`ll make you a deal, if I do all of my flips and tricks with you in there with me, and you don`t say one word, I`ll give you the ride for free.

Anna and Larry discussed it and decided they would take the deal.They got up in the air and Tom did all of his tricks and flips.

Tom said,"Larry I just knew you`d say something on that first flip,but you didn`t!

Larry replied," i was going to say something when Anna fell out, but ten dollars is ten dollars.

 

[paulbald2]

#3) You always give 100% at work;Monday 12%,Tuesday 23%,Wednesday 40%,Thursday 20%,Friday 5%.

 

[The Ocelot]

4) (Still 9/27 on the West Coast)

INVESTING FOR YOUR RETIREMENT:

If you had purchased $1000.00 of Nortel stock one year ago,
It would NOW be worth $49.00

With Enron, you would have had $16.50
left of the original $1,000.00.!

With WorldCom, you would have had less than $5.00 left

BUT

If you had purchased $1,000.00
worth of Beer one year ago,
drank all the beer,
then turned in the cans for the aluminum recycling REFUND,
you would have had
$214.00.

============================

Based on the above information,
current investment advice is to
drink heavily and recycle.

===================

It’s called the
401-Keg Plan

 

[RayN]

LOL I like it

 

[paulbald2]

#4):Q.What's the difference between a oral and a rectal thermometer?

A. The taste!

 

[The Ocelot]

5)

Things that make you go “hmmm….”

How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

(@ paulbald2 EEEEWWWWW!)

 

[paulbald2]

#5): How many ear's did Davy Crockett have?

Three,his left ear his right ear and his wild front ear.