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What do you want?

Discussion in 'ECF Vaping Singles' started by NCC, Oct 12, 2010.

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  1. NCC

    NCC Vaping Master Verified Member ECF Veteran

    Jan 14, 2010
    Fla Panhandle, USA
    I'm making an assumption here, that most members of this group are beyond their twenties.
    I'd like to assume y'all are mostly beyond your thirties, but I don't know if that would hold water.

    I'm 56. And, I've been unattached for a good long time. I find the prospect of dating to be a wee bit scary. Lord knows how such a thing could even be initiated.

    Tell me, please, how it happens? Seriously. I see attractive women my age range almost every day. I MUST assume they're happily married and that's fine. So, how's a guy supposed to progress from, "gee, she's attractive", to "wow, I'm so glad to get to know you".?

    I don't do the church thing. I wouldn't be happy with a lady I met under such misleading conditions. The grocery story thing is weird!

    I was never good at this, even when I was young,

    How do Old farts get together?
  2. Redd

    Redd Super Member ECF Veteran

    Dec 1, 2009
    Central WI
    You know, I have been out of the dating pool for so long I really don't know either. I've tried some of those online dating sites and it seems like they are full of the walking wounded, or players out to score a quick piece of....candy.

    I'm still focused on what I DON'T want in someone. Chalk that up to a bunch of bad choices. The only consistent thing in each of those bad relationships was ME. So that is where I need to focus the changes. What about ME makes me chose so poorly?

    Maybe...just maybe I was destined to be that eccentric Divorcee who never remarries and ends up the crazy cat lady in her later years.
  3. DemonCowboy

    DemonCowboy Ultra Member ECF Veteran

    Jun 18, 2010
    Florida, US
    well i'm not sure anyone would be interested in the advice of some1 who hasn't made it through their 30's but perhaps this would be an idea that hadn't been considered as i'm not the type to play games or use lines, and i've never understood the dating thing as it seems to me to b ppl lying to impress each other then when things get more serious, the truth comes out and it all goes to pot. so my approach is to make friends and be friends for awhile and if something happens, great, if not , then probably wasn't meant to be.

    but the way i get to know someone.

    Do what interests you normally, just try to find ways to express those interests around people, if you like art, go to art galleries and expos etc, if you like cars, then car shows, this day and age there are members of both sexes everywhere. When out and about doing what you're interested in, someone catches your eye, then you both automatically have something to talk about (whatever outing this interest is) and even "hi" works for that, so you start talking w/ no lines, no expectations, no b/s so you can find out whether that person is a new friend or if eventually something more can come of it.

    it just makes sense to me and it works for honest intentions.

    right now i'm not practicing such method because i'm "walking wounded" currently as redd so aptly coined and not going the length to start conversations, but see no harm in talking to some1 who does say it might help me find the motivation i need to get everything sorted out. When i am actively interested though it's the only method i even know.
  4. Zelphie

    Zelphie Ultra Member ECF Veteran

    Apr 29, 2010
    S.E. Michigan
    Im a bit late to post and I can contribute onlt by saying I have NO idea! Ive never has a social life, and almost never dated. Im weird in a shut in socially retarted ,sorta way.
  5. i think getting involved with charity work and hobbie groups can be a great way to meet people :blush:
  6. btngchck

    btngchck Ultra Member Verified Member ECF Veteran

    Jul 29, 2010
    Gibraltar, MI
    Ok NCC.......let's make a deal. If you find the answer to this let me know and if I find it I'll let you know...... Dating is like a job interview nowadays.......

    Redd....... I didn't think anybody here knew me that well......

    Yeah, I've done the online dating thing as well and besides the quick piece it still feels like a job interview....uggg
  7. Redd

    Redd Super Member ECF Veteran

    Dec 1, 2009
    Central WI
    Know YOU? I wasn't talking about anyone but myself, but I'm happy that someone else can relate.

    I guess what I want, (if I could wave a magic wand or blow out the candle and get my wish....) would just to be able to find the man who I can say I enjoy spending time with, makes me laugh in all the best ways, and who's kisses taste so good and touch is warm and tender and never feels like ....oh nevermind...I think cat lady sounds more realistic.
  8. NCC

    NCC Vaping Master Verified Member ECF Veteran

    Jan 14, 2010
    Fla Panhandle, USA
    Looking for a post in this thread by cat lady. :confused:
  9. btngchck

    btngchck Ultra Member Verified Member ECF Veteran

    Jul 29, 2010
    Gibraltar, MI
  10. NurseCin

    NurseCin Super Member ECF Veteran

    Oct 25, 2010
    Southwest Florida
    What about a crazy dog lady? lol
    I just moved to a new state and I dont know anyone....yeah, it's tough!
  11. Redd

    Redd Super Member ECF Veteran

    Dec 1, 2009
    Central WI
    So lets revive this thread!!!!!

    Today, I received a phone call from a customer that we did some work for a month or so ago. The kid is a disabled young man of about 25-27 years old, but the emotional level of maybe 14-16. He brought some friends with him the day of the install, and one of them was a man in mid 50's with pure white hair, pony tail down his back, lovely smile, and obviously liked motor cycles. (so do I BTW but that is another story)

    So the kid calls today to say he's so very happy with his new equipment and it's working wonderfully for him. Next he says that the friend he brought with him would like to know if I wanted to go for a cycle ride this weekend.

    HUH what?

    Just seems very odd to me.
  12. Zelphie

    Zelphie Ultra Member ECF Veteran

    Apr 29, 2010
    S.E. Michigan
    WOW Red, I cant believe this thread died so fast. Im sure weve had enough of being single, let alone come here and find......noone yet again lol.

    Hmm, maybe the gentleman was shy, but you can never rule out that something may not be right. Do you have a way of contacting him, maybe chat for a bit first? Gotta get on the bike one way or another ;)
  13. Redd

    Redd Super Member ECF Veteran

    Dec 1, 2009
    Central WI
    He wasn't all that shy the day he came with my young customer. Just seems like something we did in grade school you know?

    "Hey xxx tell XXX I like him/her for me ok?"
  14. VpnDrgn

    VpnDrgn Ultra Member ECF Veteran

    Jul 21, 2010
    Gulfport, MS.
    Maybe "white ponytail" had expressed an interest in you in a later conversation with "young customer",
    and "young customer" decided to play match maker.
  15. Zelphie

    Zelphie Ultra Member ECF Veteran

    Apr 29, 2010
    S.E. Michigan
    @ Red, ya that is very grade schoolish lol! Hmm, whats up with that!?
  16. nosmok

    nosmok Super Member Verified Member ECF Veteran

    May 31, 2010
    So did everyone (or anyone) find the answer to the original OP?..IF so...can you share?
  17. MiXoLoGiSt

    MiXoLoGiSt Ultra Member Verified Member ECF Veteran

    Aug 9, 2011
    LOL yeah he should have asked you himself.
  18. Katdarling

    Katdarling Blinged mods and poli-TIX ready! Verified Member ECF Veteran

    Supporting member
    Jan 25, 2011
  19. tumbafox

    tumbafox Senior Member Verified Member ECF Veteran

    Feb 20, 2010
    bellerose NY
    i'm 54 burned 3 times. would rather have a doll at this point. at this age, we can only hope for companionship. sex might be a plus but the older you get the grosser it gets. just keep vaping and doing the other thing.
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