What's with the nonsmokers being so happy I quit smoking and then asking

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bluebelle

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Seems I get the best of both worlds as far as the refusing to understand crowd. The non analog smoking scion of a cold turkey quitter.

Although the non-smoking steady knew and claimed he was more than okay with it when he met me 3 1/2 years ago that I smoked and enjoyed it,had no plans to quit, after about 6 months of seeing each other the "Those things are going to kill you" and the "That smell clings to everything, especially your hair" etc. comments and observations began.

I dare say he was right in both of the above observations. I have had a very tough time trying to switch to vaping but have been trying extremely hard for both myself (first and foremost) and secondarily for him.

When I failed the last time, I felt so very awful and his less than helpful disappointment did not help. The look on his face when I told him was much like I told him he lost someone near and dear.

This present attempt I told him once again that the comments and questions such as "When are you going to quit vaping?" and "You know my Dad smoked and he just up quit cold turkey one day because my son when he was little asked him to." are to say the least counter productive. I am sorry I am not as strong or wonderful as his Dad and all those cold turkey quitter are. Once again I informed him I am a nicotine addict and I may never be able to give it up.

I have been making a modest and for me given this is my third attempt, and after 35 + years of smoking 2 PAD, what I considered marvelous progress this time around. I am vaping what is considered a high nicotine level and I vape a lot, but I am holding my own, or so I thought.

This past New Year's Eve arrives and after a couple of drinks I get the "When are you going to give that thing up? Its like its attached to your arm or something, just drives me crazy." Well, you can imagine the response he got and I imagine the hurt I still feel after trying so hard as well.

Yes I needed to vent, so thank you for reading. :)
 

GiddyLydia

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Well, now you've at least separated your issues from HIS issues. You are a non-smoker who chooses to continue using a mild stimulant , nicotine. Your partner is a control freak. Yours is a choice, and certainly a positive one versus smoking cigarettes. His is a distasteful personality trait. Looks like it's time to give up one or the other. Which one is less pleasant?
 

bluebelle

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I really can't find it in my heart or soul to become an anti-smoking zealot. Spent too many years indulging myself to ever become so hypocritical. I know the deadly allure of smoking all too well for that.

Didn't mean to make the steady sound like such a terrible guy. He really has no clue what it is to be addicted to anything and I admit seems to have made a choice not to try to empathize or understand. Oh well, of the two of us my personality has always been more easy going. Not that I have been too happy with that realization but it is what it is.


Perhaps it is because nicotine seems like such a benign addiction to an outsider as opposed to other drug or alcohol addiction, it is harder to understand. After all, when one smokes one does not end up in rehab, jail, on skid row, engaged in illegal activities, charged with DWI, etc. Nicotine's effects and its hold on a person are far more insidious and to the outsider really unseen and unknown because while it is highly addictive it does not appear to radically alter a person's personality or behavoir like those other addictions do. They just assume you are indulging yourself and should be able to give it up rather easily.

My solution to this problem is two fold. I plan on continuing my vaping struggle/progress, but will not discuss anything vaping related with him again. After that lovely outburst, he has been very silent on vaping. The first few days I was very self conscious about vaping around him, but I decided I should not be uncomfortable and/or going through withdrawal so I am now back to vaping as much as I need and want in his presence. Vaping is here to stay and it is his problem not mine.

Also I plan on buying myself a really nice and pretty new battery and forge ahead with getting back into DIY a bit. After all, as I said before, vaping is here to stay. :)
 

cmknight

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Last person did that to me I replied "Its a personal powered pack with a replaceable rechargeable battery that hold 1.2mg of liquid. It give off a vapor that I inhale into my lungs. It contain flavorings, Propylene Glycol, liquid sweetener, Vegetable Glycerin and 18mg of C10 H14 N2." Knowing they ask what the last part is "Nicotine" Then ask them do they have any more unintelligent question?..........lol

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patkin

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They will continue being rude until someone has the guts to answer with: "the day you stop being rude which probably isn't going to happen." The self-righteous are so entrenched in their own, singular, mindset that they won't get it unless you shock them and, hopefully, embarrass them. In other words, knock them off their high horses.
 
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astounded

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Feb 21, 2013
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Why haven't I given up vaping?

"Because I don't want to hurt you
... But it's still on the list"

(I would credit that quote if I knew the source)
My current plan is to follow that up with asking them "but before I hurt you, just in case I can't control myself, have you prepared for the worst-case scenario by accepting Xenu as your lord and savior?"
- sorry forgot to quote but that is a good one!
 

adopogi

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My wife also expects me to totally quit vaping as the next step to finally stop the 'act of smoking' altogether. Eventually she'd rather have me vape than fall off the wagon.

She WILL hit me in the head with the Precise ELA I'm planning to get once I reach 1 yr of no analogs. Worth it. Stick me in the eye if I get a Poldiac? Worth it.
 

Rickg

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I'm glad I haven't had someone ask me this yet, but I'm sure the question is coming. My answer will be NEVER! Nicotine and vaping are pleasurable experiences that I enjoy. Also, there has been some research that shows nicotine might help prevent Alzheimer's disease, might boost brain function, could help with depression, and might be good for fine motor control. There is also a good degree of anecdotal evidence that it increases creativity.
 

Evi|grin

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I have only had one person ask, "do you think you can quit vaping as easily?"

All i can say is, "ATM i really don't know but ive set some goals i believe i can attain within 6 more months. I already achieved the first 3 goals with a little effort. At this point im enjoying being free from smoking and i wont allow anything to jeopardize that even if it means vaping for the rest of my life"

My next goal is to be at 6mg (comfortably) and then i will reevaluate my situation. Then i might quit or i might not. At this time it is not something i need to worry about.
 
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