Hi all,,,, i feel a bit wound up after reading this thread
there have been a multitude of good answers and wise takes on smoking vs vaping vs air
but i'm now disheartened - i've got severe Ocd ,,, and well my thoughts on health are irrational or way out of the normal range.
and i've just started vaping yesterday (vaping not vamping {omg

))
but i now just don't know what to do
i don't think i
can quit smoking
. i did once get to day 11 cold turkey - but i went for a drink; and wham - back to 20-30 cigarettes a day..
so the harm reduction route seems to be the best option
- but for some reason i find even that daunting and scary,
(i'm one of those - i don't want to live on this planet types at times..)
i really want to be healthy; very healthy
- i eat organic food; without exception
i do all i can
but then smoke 1 1/2 packets of cigs a day
I'm just wandering; because i just shelled out £275 on a setup and lots of e-juice
and don't know if i should return them (if i'm not going to be comfortable using them
)
i mean i'm using organic e-juice even - but my last vaping period ended when i found out diacectyl is an organic compound
.
and at the time that was too much for my mind to handle
. so;
i threw away £120 worth of equipment and started smoking again..
(even with the knowledge diacectyl is in cigarette smoke
{idiot})
i just don't know what to do with myself
i spend a
large part of my day 'preoccupied' by the dangers of smoking
and it really distresses me
but i don't want to start freaking out about vaping now
.
i ideally want off .
i love the experience of vaping and seeing as it
is very much healthier
i think its an incredible step in the right direction - and will save a lot of people.
but i don't know if i can do it with peace of mind; but then i
can't go on smoking cigarettes either..
sorry i know i haven't added anything
. just my feelings / musings really..
once again i'm getting in a state over this
i don't know where to go with this one..
one day i hope my life will be simple
Regards
j