Can Anyone Help a Confused Newbie?

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Evirgin said:
I'm terribly sorry you all feel so aggrieved that I'm asking questions that have been asked hundreds of times before.

I'm speaking for myself when I say I'm not "aggrieved" that you are asking questions. I'm "aggrieved" that you quoted me, misunderstood me and attacked on a public forum.

Evirgin said:
I suppose if there was an upside, you might be pleased that you have a new "comrade".

Speaking for myself on this one too, the verdict is still out on that one. I'll see what future posts bring. But for right now, the first impression is not good.
 

Evirgin

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Jun 6, 2008
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For the sake of clarity:

There seems to have been some kind of misunderstanding regarding me saying that my questions hadn't been answered.

I didn't mean that they weren't answered by the helpful posters in this thread - they were. Thank you to those who were helpful. I meant they weren't answered during my extensive review of the forums before I posted this thread. As I think I said at the time, I just became more confused. I thought it would help to outline my specific situation and ask for advice relating to that.

I didn't particularly appreciate being told to search the forums when I'd already spent a lot of time doing just that, BEFORE I started this thread. Perhaps I didn't make it clear enough that I'd already done that.

But I stand by my comments about considering it to be rude to refer to me as "she" as though you were in a closed room and I had already left. As my mother always told me - "she's the cat's mother". No idea what that means, but the bottom line is that, where I come, from it's rude to refer to someone in the third person when they are part of present company.

No one in particular has offended me - please don't get upset.

Jane
 

Evirgin

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Jun 6, 2008
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Mr.Darcy said:
we arent aggrieved that you are asking questions.we are aggrieved (well i am)that when we tried to help you,you verbally attacked us like its our fault that there isnt any definitive answer to your question,only opinions.thats not our fault,thats the reality of the current situation regarding e-smoking.

No - I don't think so Mr D'Arcy - I didn't attack you or anyone. I complained about bad etiquette. When I got a lecture on researaching the forums, I tried to explain that I'd already done so.

As I already said - a lot gets lost in text and there has obviously been some misunderstandings.
 

Evirgin

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Jun 6, 2008
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karenwest1961 said:
Evirgin said:
I'm terribly sorry you all feel so aggrieved that I'm asking questions that have been asked hundreds of times before.

I'm speaking for myself when I say I'm not "aggrieved" that you are asking questions. I'm "aggrieved" that you quoted me, misunderstood me and attacked on a public forum.

Evirgin said:
I suppose if there was an upside, you might be pleased that you have a new "comrade".

Speaking for myself on this one too, the verdict is still out on that one. I'll see what future posts bring. But for right now, the first impression is not good.

Ditto.

Re-read what I wrote - there was no attacking.

Anyway, this is just getting stupid and childish now.
 
I just saw where I accidently typed "she." And yes, it was honestly an accident. I had typed too fast and not thinking because I was talking to another poster. Once again, my apologies. Once again, there are assumptions being made on your part about who is intentionally being "rude." I have never been considered a rude person...up til now. And I'll wear that badge of honor when I say:

I am moving on from this thread and I wish you much luck finding what you are looking for.
 

NerdyCinderella

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May 14, 2008
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Evirgin said:
No - I don't think so Mr D'Arcy - I didn't attack you or anyone. I complained about bad etiquette. When I got a lecture on researaching the forums, I tried to explain that I'd already done so.
As I already said - a lot gets lost in text and there has obviously been some misunderstandings.
What is she talking about?
 

sanneke

Moved On
May 28, 2008
816
3
USA
NerdyCinderella said:
Evirgin said:
No - I don't think so Mr D'Arcy - I didn't attack you or anyone. I complained about bad etiquette. When I got a lecture on researaching the forums, I tried to explain that I'd already done so.
As I already said - a lot gets lost in text and there has obviously been some misunderstandings.
What is she talking about?




She's THE princes on the pea.

jeez................enough already.
She has her own thread, people are trying to help her and advice her.
Yet it's not good enough for her.

Whatever.......... :roll:
 

Mr.Darcy

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May 16, 2008
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i dont understand what we are supposed to have done to provoke this.you are quibbling about petty semantics,when you should be appreciating our willingness to debate this topic (yet again)for your benefit..i said "she" because i was addressing Karen(who was also trying to help you),about her advice to you-i wasnt addressing you directly because i was talking to Karen about what she had suggested,not to you,hence the perfectly acceptable and correct grammatical use of the third person.Karen has actual experience with e-smoking...it was your situation we were discussing-"she" is not an insulting or degrading term.if there were more than one person asking questions on this topic,then a name would be necessary for clarification.whats the big deal,why make an issue of it?its a public forum,not a dinner party at your house,and i dont know you personally at all or even have a relationship with you on this forum...and theres not much point debating pros and cons directly with someone who hasnt had any experience whatsoever in this area.whatever forums you have been on in the past are irrelevant,this one operates in an informal way-im sure you have read it enough to know that by now.also,threads go off topic regularly.if you want every other poster to conform to your ideas of the rules of etiquette,then im afraid you are gonna be disappointed.whatever your mother taught you doesnt apply to the rest of us,and not everyone comes from where you do.allowances are made here for individual expression,syntactically ill formed or otherwise,as long as people are courteous-which im afraid you havnt been.and when was anyone facetious or disdainful towards you?every single person who posted on this thread has been helpful and polite.i have clearly given you the opinion which you asked for from the users of this forum earlier in the post(and i said hello to you),and answered any questions which you raised from my posts quickly and politely,as have others-several times,and i dont expect abuse from you for my efforts-and clearly others feel the same way.what more do you need to know?we are all in the same boat-buy one of the ecigs we have recommended and see how it goes-we gave you a good supplier already..or else do your own thing according to your research(which we have all had to do).if you choose to be insulting and ungrateful about it,then thats up to you.believe it or not,this forum has already discussed these issues many times,and we dont have to do it again for our own sake,we were just trying to help you.i think the only intentional rudeness on this entire thread was posted by you.
 

Evirgin

Full Member
Jun 6, 2008
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It would appear that this "comedy of errors" has now brought the bullies out of the woodwork aswell.

Always interesting. I can only assume that people don't read things properly to jump to the conclusions that they do. The bullies probably don't really read any of it - they just notice that one person is getting hassled and then take that as their cue to jump right on in, and give the person a good verbal kicking as well.

Overall, the only reasonable explanation that is even faintly plausible is that people are reading things into what I've typed that just aren't there. At no risk of repeating myself, because I am repeating myself - I read these forums extensively before posting. I therefore didn't particularly like it when I was told to go and read the forums - as I had already done that, and had already said that I'd done it. It's a bit like your teacher irritably telling you to do your homework after you've already handed it in.

On the point of my etiquette standards, perhaps an analogy will help. You're at a party in a group of people that you don't know very well (if at all). You make some conversation. They then carry on with the subject of your conversation but refer to you in the third person, and don't make eye contact with you, as though you weren't there. Feels good? Not good?

I believe manners exist to assist with social cohesion. The above scenario demonstrates basic psychology - no one likes to feel left out or marginalised - no matter what their background is.

Darcy - wow - I've just seen your post. "Abusing" you ... "insulting and ungrateful"...

No - I don't think I have been or done any of those things. I would say, in fact, that some users on this forum (not you) have used their established position to be caustic and rude - e.g. the comment about the princess and the pea, the "what is she talking about" comment and yet another one inferring that I should have read the forum.

Maybe I am not understanding the situation - in which case - would you mind letting me know where I've abused or insulted you? Those are very strong words, and I don't think I've done any of those things. Made a point - yes. Stood my ground - yes. Insulted and abused anyone - I don't think so.

I think I've expressed my gratitude at least 3 times, but just in case it wasn't clear, let me say it again. To everyone who has been helpful and given advice - thank you - I really appreciate it. You've helped me to find a supplier and make a decision about what to buy in the first instance.

when was anyone facetious or disdainful towards you?
I could say, but that would just be more fuel on the fire. I may have misinterpreted this person's somewhat acerbic style of writing, although I noticed him/her being equally disdainful to another poster, so I'm guessing it's not just me.

You know, it's getting a bit out of hand and a bit like the Wicca Man. However, the islanders actually had a logical (to them) reason for persecuting the outsider because they thought his sacrifice would placate the gods and return their harvests to them.

But getting out of your prams and working yourselves up into a frenzy over a few comments that I've made is just a total overreaction.

I guess you can't reason with the unreasonable.

Jane
 

Klaue

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May 22, 2008
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I'm wondering what type of forums the people here were to before. I'm in several forums, Moderator even in some of them, and one of them is sometimes not very "nice". I know the type of poster our dear Evirgin is.. I firstly sorted her in as a troll (her signature would've been a nice ironic touch to it) but now I think she fits more into the category of flamebaiter. A flamebaiter, if you don't know that, is a person who posts to provoke flamewars because they get something out of it. In most cases, I would happily jump to it (I don't know for what strange reason, but I somehow like it) but not here, because this forum and, as I assume, quite some posters here are not used to that (no offense) and could misunderstand it.
So, the peacefullest way to handle a poster like her is to just ignore her, not posting anymore. As the Netiquette states: "Don't get involved in flame wars. Neither post nor respond to incendiary material." At least as long as she doesn't appologise for all of this. Being offended about being reverenced in the third person is just a sign that she probably wasn't in that many forums as she said because this is a common behavior in every forum I ever saw. Basically, such a thing screams "flamebait" or "trolling" like about nothing else. It is as if she would be offended by the TV because the news speaker diddn't know her name - just pointless. In turn, she attacked everyone here - and never appologised for it. She keeps saying that she was misunderstood and that everyone got her wrong but apparently she herself did nothing wrong, not at all.
In short: I would advise everyone here to ignore her as long as she doesn't appologise and as long as she is offended by common forum behavior.

@Evirgrin: Stop it. Do not touch the keyboard of yours. If you are, in contrast to what I think, not a flamebaiter, then stop right there. Read everything you wrote yet again. Read it carefully. If you don't understand why the analogy to "princess on the pea" is accurate, read again. Read as long as it takes until you'll understand. If you don't, ask yourself how it can be that everyone except you sees nothing offending about referring to someone in the third person and noone except you thinks anyone was rude to you. Do you really think everyone but you is wrong? If you answer yes to this, I have to say that public forums are not really a place for you, no matter on how man you were. Feel free to attack me, I won't care, because as I said, I'm used to posters like you. I may answer to any attack, but just because I see it as a weird sort of entertainment, not because I care what you think of me :) But for the sake of this forum, I'll probably will just ignore it.
 

Oliver

ECF Founder, formerly SmokeyJoe
Admin
Verified Member
Whooooops!

First argument on this forum, I think I shall lock the topic now. Let's all forget this happened please!

Jane, please post your remaining unanswered questions in a new post - I will update the newbies answers thread accordingly.

Thanks all,

SJ
 
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