GotVapes.com's Original: MEGA Contest, FUN & Features Thread 1 of 2
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A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:
You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!
So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs.
She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.
'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'
So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.
'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous and Help With Housework.
'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'
Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.
PLEASE NOTE:
To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.
The first floor has wives that love s*x.
The second floor has wives that love s*x, have money and like beer. (kid you not!! When I read this line, Mike said "DONE!")
The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.
You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!
So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs.
She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.
'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'
So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.
'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous and Help With Housework.
'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'
Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.
PLEASE NOTE:
To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.
The first floor has wives that love s*x.
The second floor has wives that love s*x, have money and like beer. (kid you not!! When I read this line, Mike said "DONE!")
The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.
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Thats awesome Sharon..I agree with Mike..Second floor is good enough for me
funny! Which floor has the retirees with good medical insurance, don't give a crap about sex anymore and are willing to hire a maid?? Are they in the bargain basement???
I am lucky when it comes to neatness, my husband picks up after himself and will make the bed etc. Now when it comes to cleaning or laundry - his chair is his friend
Lol! I do all of that for myself and my kiddos.. But they are 6&10. So they get a pass..
Ok so now back to the regularly scheduled programming.
I have a severe sweet tooth. I need a sweet juice. I mean almost sickening sweet. Any recommendations?
I have a severe sweet tooth. I need a sweet juice. I mean almost sickening sweet. Any recommendations?
I think I've had this same rant on this same thread
I could join you today, but I have to clean the dishes off the counter and get them to the dishwasher or we're eating off placemats tonight.
There goes one *points* on the back of a dragon his lil fae friend flying beside them...
I think I've had this same rant on this same thread
I could join you today, but I have to clean the dishes off the counter and get them to the dishwasher or we're eating off placemats tonight.
LOL that made me giggle. So sad of my misery to love your company. I feel better now. Clothes are in the washer. I'm at least looking at the counter now.
Does anyone else wait to do the housework like 1 hr before the hubby comes home, so it doesn't look like you sat on your .... all day? Or is it just me?
Hubs will be home in 1 hour 10 minutes. Nuff said?
I saw that one, had roses in his hand too
had three store.
in the middle of an old Jewish man and his wife's shoe store.
the right-hand hire a new store owner..looking for a team of people who think in 3 days and make a advertising signs.. Finally, figure out a lot of money over : here the most beautiful shoes in the world.
the old man wakes up in the morning and see the new name plate. his wife says: - trouble, honey.
the old man does not say anything, just humming.
2 days after. the left-hand hire a new store owner..looking for a team of people. pay lot of money, same people. Finally, figure out a lot of money over : cheapest shoes in the world.
the wife was say: big trouble we.
the old Jewis does not say anything, just humming.
Next morning:
the old man puts up one hand painted Molino, over the door: entrance
in the middle of an old Jewish man and his wife's shoe store.
the right-hand hire a new store owner..looking for a team of people who think in 3 days and make a advertising signs.. Finally, figure out a lot of money over : here the most beautiful shoes in the world.
the old man wakes up in the morning and see the new name plate. his wife says: - trouble, honey.
the old man does not say anything, just humming.
2 days after. the left-hand hire a new store owner..looking for a team of people. pay lot of money, same people. Finally, figure out a lot of money over : cheapest shoes in the world.
the wife was say: big trouble we.
the old Jewis does not say anything, just humming.
Next morning:
the old man puts up one hand painted Molino, over the door: entrance
Good afternoon my friends....
Every day you are alive is a special occasion. Every minute, every breath, is a gift.
Mary Manin Morrissey
Every day you are alive is a special occasion. Every minute, every breath, is a gift.
Mary Manin Morrissey
ok gang, I'm gonna skeedaddle. (((((Y'all)))))))) hopefully will be back later tonite.
Hiya ed and eagle and cya
Hiya ed and eagle and cya
*giggle*
I'm gonna add caramel apple is good for a sweet tooth too...
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