There are usually 2 sides to every story. I think we are just getting one side. She is an adult. May sound mean but if I had to beg someone for a cigarette I would be out the door. But then that is just me.
Help! Fiance want to smoke!
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My wife is pretty stubborn about vaping being the same as smoking. Her standing is that there are no concrete studies that prove vaping is safer. The only peer reviewed research I have read is testing done on the disposables like njoy and Blu. Other papers deal with user perception which is only subjective. With stubborn people it takes some hard evidence to convince them and some just want to believe what they want. Look at the people that thought immunizations were linked to autism, some still believe it even after the research was found to be false.
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I say get rid of her. Don't let this girl come between you and your vapor! Really, why would you want to get married anyway? Find you a nice girl who vapes and put an end to this controversy. You can have a fun girl who won't hassle you and will support your decision to vape. It sounds like this other girl is trying to guilt you into quitting with "I am gonna smoke if you don't stop vaping" routine.
Just my opinion. Not sure how good an idea it is to take relationship advice from a lion....
Just my opinion. Not sure how good an idea it is to take relationship advice from a lion....
Ah, but Edd, HE is telling her NO she Can't smoke..... That's not cool either!
You are BOTH adults who have the right to make Your Own decision. You have no more right to tell her she can't smoke than she has the right to tell you that you can't vape. Seems to me she is just pointing out (mimicking in a way) YOUR own behavior toward her.
Granted, smoking is the worse of the two, she has the Right to choose for herself. Seems like you MADE her quit. That's not how a good relationship works. It will not work without respect on either side. Respect goes hand in hand with supporting each other not matter what our personal choices are. Period.
You are BOTH adults who have the right to make Your Own decision. You have no more right to tell her she can't smoke than she has the right to tell you that you can't vape. Seems to me she is just pointing out (mimicking in a way) YOUR own behavior toward her.
Granted, smoking is the worse of the two, she has the Right to choose for herself. Seems like you MADE her quit. That's not how a good relationship works. It will not work without respect on either side. Respect goes hand in hand with supporting each other not matter what our personal choices are. Period.
This is what is commonly known as an ultimatum! You both smoked at one point. She quit cold turkey or other than vaping. You quit by vaping. It sounds to me like she thinks you got off too easily and didn't suffer enough like she did and she thinks it's unfair. Do you not allow her to smoke if she wanted to? If you don't, that is not very fair of you (don't know if this is so).
No one can make another person do, or not do, what they don't want to do. In other words, you can't make decisions for others (if they're an adult). Why would she even bring up the subject of starting to smoke again unless you quit vaping? It sounds like she's trying to make a point that has nothing to do with smoking nor vaping. Just my opinion...
I hope you both find some way of communicating with each other without giving ultimatums, LOL.
No one can make another person do, or not do, what they don't want to do. In other words, you can't make decisions for others (if they're an adult). Why would she even bring up the subject of starting to smoke again unless you quit vaping? It sounds like she's trying to make a point that has nothing to do with smoking nor vaping. Just my opinion...
I hope you both find some way of communicating with each other without giving ultimatums, LOL.
My wife says a lot of things . .some of them are probably about my vaping. I wouldn't know, I stopped listening years ago.
Aaah, An ex-smoker, taking her angst out on those around her, and taking it to the point of obsession, and threatening to take up smoking again. Hmmm, what's familiar about this story?
She needs to vape more than you do right now.
Give her some time, then find out why she doesn't want to use vaping as a method to stay off the cigarettes and why she's got such a downer on it. She is obviously undergoing WTA withdrawal but something has happened to make vaping as evil as smoking in her mind.
I should've been more specific on not letting her have a cigarette. Almost 2 years ago, we decided to stop. She told me to not let her have another cigarette in her life ever. So I stood strong to that while we were quitting. We then went to hookah for nicotine, and then I picked up vaping and dropped hookah. We still have our hookah, she knows how to set it up, pack a bowl, and use it, and we have talked about taking it out and using it again, or hanging out with some friends at a hookah lounge, which, after the incident today, we will probably do tonight. Yall are all right that she is an adult and that I should let her make her own choices, but both of us have lost family to smoking, and majority of my family that smoked has switched to PV's. So, I guess i'm being stubborn and not letting her smoke partially due to my selfishness of health, smell and taste. So, should I just tell her yes, go buy a pack and be done with it?
Went through something similar with my GF, she was lightly interested when I began and I made sure to buy her a setup as well, she took it to work, she's a manager and some of her co workers loved the idea. Now her co workers are progressing marvelously, she ain't keen and has stated to me that I take things way over the top, not an untruth.
She has said she can't get into it but understands how amazing it's been for me and her friends to use it constantly and that she gets it, and that for her if she gets the condo painted that would be her motivation to go full time Vapeing.
This led me to a few thoughts, 1. That she is a but jealous that Vapeing worked so well for me and all her 6 friends. 2. That if given an ultimatum which I don't believe would happen, but if given id be willing to give up my 10 year relationship with her, I've been around the block and I'm to old for ultimatums, however one never came so all is good. 3. If GF needs a more logical approach as in a goal I'm good with it.
I do my thing and Vape, I don't and never have tried to force Vapeing on her and I don't get in the way of her smoking at all.
I try not to talk of Vapeing but Vape at will this is ok.
OP I hope u work out your situation, just stay calm and rational talk with her not too her! If she decides to smoke so be it, it's not on you it's just her way to justify smoking so let her and u Vape On.
Best of luck.
She has said she can't get into it but understands how amazing it's been for me and her friends to use it constantly and that she gets it, and that for her if she gets the condo painted that would be her motivation to go full time Vapeing.
This led me to a few thoughts, 1. That she is a but jealous that Vapeing worked so well for me and all her 6 friends. 2. That if given an ultimatum which I don't believe would happen, but if given id be willing to give up my 10 year relationship with her, I've been around the block and I'm to old for ultimatums, however one never came so all is good. 3. If GF needs a more logical approach as in a goal I'm good with it.
I do my thing and Vape, I don't and never have tried to force Vapeing on her and I don't get in the way of her smoking at all.
I try not to talk of Vapeing but Vape at will this is ok.
OP I hope u work out your situation, just stay calm and rational talk with her not too her! If she decides to smoke so be it, it's not on you it's just her way to justify smoking so let her and u Vape On.
Best of luck.
As long as she is gonna let you tell her one way or the other continue telling her no, in my opinion, if you love her.
I am getting the idea that we have two people that might not be too compatable with each other. Might need to sit back and think a little about if you two want to spend a lifetime with each other dictating what each other can do. Just saying. Hope it works out and you can be happy. Because marriage is not easy otherwise.
So, while I was driving her home from work I told her that i have been thinking about what she said, and as a grown adult, I can't stop her if she wants to smoke. I told her I don't agree with it, but she has to be able to male her own decisions. Turns out she's had a pack hidden for a few months now that she hasn't touched. Happy with the outcome, no. But, I can only hope she'll see how much better vaping would be for her. Thanks for all the help and input guys/gals. Sometimes you just need another perspective and someone else to tell tou you're wrong in order for you to see it yourself.
Well that all sucks. My wife doesn't smoke fortunately, and was always at me to give up smoking (never did a scrap of good though). Now that I'm vaping she's unsure, but I think she can see the benefits, just short of actually being supportive about it.
Maybe your fiance will see the light eventually and ask for help to start vaping again. Don't push, just wait it out.
Maybe your fiance will see the light eventually and ask for help to start vaping again. Don't push, just wait it out.
Like we all know, no one can makes us stop. The only person that can is ourselves. Mr. Robin has never smoked but I've always known that he would've liked for me to quit, only to keep me around longer. 
He actually suggested ecigs to get me through times of traveling. So I started researching and here I am.
Lead by example not by force. It's good that you talked it through without ultimatums. Communication and respect are KEY in a successful relationship.. I have hope for you two! 
He actually suggested ecigs to get me through times of traveling. So I started researching and here I am. Lead by example not by force. It's good that you talked it through without ultimatums. Communication and respect are KEY in a successful relationship.
. I have hope for you two! 
Perhaps if you stopped treating your fiancee like a child she would be less inclined to punch your buttons with threats of smoking. It might be a good idea to come to an agreement with your fiancee that you will both stop using the issue of smoking as heavy weaponry in your relationship.
You guys sound like you hit the wall after a year of marriage, not engaged lol. I think a lot of relationships go through that lovespite period where you want to do, or say things just to push the other person to annoyance, and its hard to see them happy doing things that you arent necessarily into yourself.
Explain to her that smoking messes with your sense of taste and pleasure, that's exactly what keeps one addicted. As a smoker I never felt a strong need to quit because of those reasons. After I picked up vaping I really didn't like taking a puff after staying off the analogs for a while.
She needs better juice or a better kit.
She needs better juice or a better kit.
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