Seeing all this talk about men that cower in the face of their wives makes me sad. Somewhere along the line, I think Men have lost their edge... The instinct to be a provider has been replaced by a desperate need for approval.
BEING an actual provider should be satisfaction enough, but for many men this has been supplanted by the need for acknowledgement that they have provided. This is the path to wimpdom.
These men crave the "atta boy" and approval of not just women... they want EVERYBODY to tell them they are doing a good job. They live by the social currency of aknowledgement and validation.
But a real man... he's got a completely different agenda. His primal instincts drive his decisions... they are driven by the satisfaction that comes from being able to take care of business. These men don't NEED the "atta boy"and they are not motivated by it... The "good" men that women can't seem to find, understand that KNOWING you've done a good job is enough. Nobody has to say it... nobody has to applaud their efforts. They don't have to walk around saying "LOOK AT ME... I'M A GOOD CATCH"...
These guys don't ask for permission nor do they beg for forgiveness. They are confident and cocksure... That's not to say they wouldn't seek advise or consult... They wouldn't say "honey can they buy this... I hope it's OK"... they say, "I'd like to buy this so I'm going to, which do you think looks better, the black or the red?"
Bottom line... it's all about being who you are and following your instincts... Nobody is going to read this and change as a result of seeing it... too many factors are at play and you're either wired this way or your not. Ladies, you can't change a man to become this either, nor should you try. People are who they are... and if ya want a take charge-man then you have to start by finding one... they can't be created by a relationship dynamic. The fact of the matter is that they are hard to find because they, with rare exceptions, are ALL in healthy relationships that will remain healthy because they are such good providers.