"Is that your new crutch"

[SouthernBliss]

Preface: I just need to get this off my chest because it has really upset me.

I might have only been irritated if someone else had said this to me about vaping, but when my mother said it I was really ...... off. I suppose I should have known that her being supportive of it was bound to be temporary (that is sort of how she rolls), none the less I had been really pleased about how she has been up until today. The reason it pisses me off more than hearing it from someone else is that she smoked till she was in her late 60's (I'm quitting quite a bit younger than she did) and I am confident only quit because the doctor told her it would kill her in the next year or two if she did not. I'll give her props for quitting "cold turkey" but the reality is her "crutch" has been the welbutrin she still takes over 10 years later (in addition to her paxil which she has been on since it came out). I also told her the first week that I had no intention of giving up nicotine and explained exactly why. So my continuing to vape after quitting smoking should be no big surprise. When I asked her why she was taking a negative tact about it now she really couldn't come up with a good answer. I don't know maybe she is feeling spiteful because she did have to quit cold turkey and I had an easier time of it all. I honestly don't see it as a crutch. I'm making a choice not smoke and still get the nicotine that I have used to self medicate since I was 18. If I quit vaping there is no question in the world I would go back to smoking that day. In fact one of the reasons I know I will not be giving up nicotine is the negative personality changes that my mother went through and retained once she quit smoking.

 

[Orobas]

Well I hate to say it, but maybe a smile and a "yes it is!" would have been the best way to stop the conversation short.

People don't know what to do when you agree with them.

 

[zapped]

Next time tell her 'No, it isnt a crutch.I see it as a better and more advanced alternative to smoking" She may be giving you grief because she's a little jealous she didnt have or wasnt aware of that option when she quit.

 

[E Dub]

Its definitely my new crutch!

 

[Talyon]

I was hurt by same words by my GF in the first week of my Vapeing. Just the other day she says u sure your not drinking that stuff? It's just the way she rolls I accept that but I can be very sensistive, my answer both times was nope and continued to watch TV in silence.

No matter what anyone says Vape proud and never feel quilty. Most people say this stuff out of jealousy for many many reasons.

But it can really hurt depending on who it come from no matter what their reason for saying it is.

 

[supermarket]

Sounds like you are just being too sensitive, OP. I only say that because I am too! Especially with loved ones, family and relatives, or people I am close too. Their opinions and words weigh more heavily on me than they should!

Don't take offense by what she said. Most people criticize the things others do because of their own hang-ups. It honestly sounds like you just need to vent (thus creating this thread), but you already know within that you are doing nothing wrong , so keep up the good work

Hey, if our mothers and fathers didn't hassle us, what else would they be good for once we reach adulthood?

 

[quatro]

I like my new crutch better than my old crutch.

 

[SissySpike]

I agree with Orobas. Id just say yes it is and let Mom be right I dont argue with my wife Mother or cops you will never win;-)

 

[bnrkwest]

That is what I was thinking, she may really have vape envy! bnrk

Next time tell her 'No, it isnt a crutch.I see it as a better and more advanced alternative to smoking" She may be giving you grief because she's a little jealous she didnt have or wasnt aware of that option when she quit.

 

[AgentAnia]

No one has (yet!) but if someone (family or not) asked me if vaping was my new crutch, I'd answer "No, it's my new best friend!"

On the subject of non-supportive friends and family, it happens for a variety of reasons. One of my best friends tries to be supportive, but I can tell she's a bit resentful (she quit with the patch; took her several tries) that I've been able to get off cigarettes but can still have my nic. "Are you going to cut down?" "Nope!" "I don't see why you use all those different flavors." "Cause it's fun!!!"

I simply refuse to take their bait. I'm vaping for me, not for their approval. I try not to be adversarial and always give them a cheerful answer, even if it's one they really don't want to hear, lol! (Well, except for the smoke nazis who approach me on the street. With them, I don't feel I have to be cheerful, bwaaaaahaaaaa) But with your mom, well, she's your mom, after all. Be nice, but don't let her (or anyone) discourage you from vaping! Vape proud!

 

[SouthernBliss]

Ok well I guess you all are right. Maybe I should have just accepted the criticism better. At least I know to be ready for the attacks now.

 

[AgentAnia]

Ok well I guess you all are right. Maybe I should have just accepted the criticism better. At least I know to be ready for the attacks now.

I just remembered reading on another thread several months ago on this same theme, an unsupportive mother. The poster said she would just let her mother have her rant, and then reply "And I love you too, mom." Maybe that's the way to go... Just a thought.

 

[DC2]

Most people in this world are somewhat anti-nicotine because of decades of brainwashing.
But you'd never hear any of them say anything about someone drinking coffee.

It's not really hypocrisy if they don't know their understanding of nicotine is incorrect.
But it will continue as long as their understanding of nicotine is incorrect.

 

[Worzel]

When people ask me what I am "smoking" in a negative tone, I give a huge smile and tell them "my habit replacement therapy!"

 

[SpiritBear]

I have nothing profound to add to what others have said here; however, I had a similar issue with some family and friends a couple of weeks ago what was really disheartening and the support on here made a big difference, really helped me get on top of it and understand that regardless of their words, they mean well.

 

[supermarket]

I agree with Orobas. Id just say yes it is and let Mom be right I dont argue with my wife Mother or cops you will never win;-)

Truest thing another man has EVER spoken. Wise words, brother....wise words!

 

[zoiDman]

Ok well I guess you all are right. Maybe I should have just accepted the criticism better. At least I know to be ready for the attacks now.

I think it is Understandable to get a Little ...... Off when someone says some thing like they did.

For Me. vaping is a "Crutch". A Crutch I needed to get off Smoking. Because Nothing I tried Worked for any Considerable Length of Time.

So I Don't get too Upset when a Few People have referred to Vaping in this way.

 

[mare ze dotes]

When people ask me what I am "smoking" in a negative tone, I give a huge smile and tell them "my habit replacement therapy!"

That is good. I will remember that.

There is no doubt that i would go right back to Cigarettes if i did not have my little pink eGo. The thing is that I have some that run and 12mg and some that run at 24mg right now. I would be so easy for me to cut back to a solid 18mg. Heck, my late night vape is about 9mg. I find that weaning out the nic is not as hard as the fiddleaboutness, hand to mouth habit is to give up.

 

[BostLabs]

Well that depends on who is saying that.

Sometimes I've heard that said as a conversation opener. I reply "yup!" and see where it goes from there.

If they start into a 'its bad for you rant' and it isn't family, they no longer exist to me at the moment.

Family? Well I know what their crutch is and I'll ask them if they really want to talk about what isn't good for anyone. I haven't had to use that one yet.

 

[Iffy]

Well, I'm down to vaping several 'crutches' vs. smoking several thousand of 'em! I get around a lot better now as a result...