The ground began to shake We realized the cave we set out to reach was in the side of a volcano. Too scared to transform the princess and I climbed into the Terminator's arms and he took off running away from the lava pouring towards us.
"I'm not very smart in this dream," I noted to myself. Then I realized the large barrels of PG I had been toting around were liquid. "They're similar to water, surely..." I thought. The princess began obediently hurling them with me toward the active volcano.
I looked at the princess "I have to have Strawberry Milk, and maybe a blackberry, raspberry, sweet lemon mix. The rest is up to you but please don't choose all meat flavors. I'm sorry but that's just gross"
OK, only one the very best - Bacon and Cheese, and some Apples and Cheese, and Cheese with Cheese! When we were all stocked up with extra VG we were off.
Focus now and we'll be .....
able to fly. We transformed and flew high above Venice (don't ask where we put our stuff, it's a dream after all). We did loop de loops and flipped over and back. We kept gazing at each other with our eagle eyes and finally flew straight up in the air. As the summer sun began to rise we plummeted towards the ground together and finally.....
we landed we were on the beaches of Ireland just outside of Dublin and it was such a beautiful day. There was a light rain and people were everywhere just having fun. It was a festival and the celebrations were planned to continue for a week.
I realized I was very drunk.. Given that's the best time to make big decisions, I turned to the princess and said, "Lets buy our own castle together honey? Also, I want you to know that you are beautiful JUST the way you are, but if you wouldn't say no to some electrolysis, I'm happy to go halvsies. Just saying?"
Found a clinic that would see us today. I held her slightly hairy hand for hopefully the last time. As we entered the clinic the receptionist gasped then averted her eyes and handed us forms. "Just fill those out" We took the forms and....
Filled them out. I agreed to shave my mustache too, because mustaches look good on VERY FEW people. The princess indicated to the technician she wanted her mustache done FIRST.
Sensual if I wasn't kissing a dog. I went in the back with the princess and realized she was a lot tougher than I thought. The process looked painful and left her skin red and irritated. Because of the sheer amount of hair that had to be removed they decided to do her face, hands and breasts and wax the rest of her body.
I left to shave thinking excitedly of holding a hair free princess. I could hear screams occasionally but tried not to think what could cause my princess to scream like that. Finally......
She emerged, and she was a pure white as Snow White, and by that, I mean most of her skin had never seen the sun before, so she waited in recovery mode while they waxed my stach.
"Man, I'm CERTAIN this hurts worse than childbirth," I thought. When I came out and said to the princes, "Life is so much HARDER as a man," I realized the princess still had her extra cool canines and---
Those beautiful golden eyes. I reached for her hairless hand and apologized when she winced and pulled slightly away. "Sorry, I'll be more sensitive." I leaned towards her and my lips lightly brushed hers......
And since even the hairiest dog doesn't have hair on their LIPS, (I think) well, we shared a beautiful magical kiss.
Then the esthetician presented her bill for services rendered, and I sobered RIGHT UP, let me tell you.
"Let's make a run for it," I whispered to the terminator, who had required zero hair services because bodybuilders ALREADY wax regularly, from pictures I have seen, BURNED into my brain and not in a good way, so we all----
raced for the door where we got stuck as all three of us tried to exit at once. Pulling the Terminator back and pushing the princess forward we all made it outside just as the dense esthetician finally realized we were skipping out on the bill.
We ran down the street with her jogging after us (not my fault she was out of shape and couldn't keep up). I looked back and saw she had given up and we slowed to a walk laughing as we went....
As we slowed down I couldn't help but wonder why we just cheated them out of the fee for making the princess so beautiful. After all she is a princess and has uncountable wealth.
I began to think we better go back and pay them, so I brought it up her and she agreed we should pay the bill after all this is something we will have to have done again and we don't want to burn our bridges while we're still on them.
We went back to the shop just as the police showed up and without hesitation the esthetician from the shop started yelling THERE - THERE THEY ARE. We quickly said We were there to pay the bill and tried to apologize. But the out of shape woman wouldn't hear a thing we said.
The Police started to handcuff us and with just look we all YELLED at the same time FOCUS.....
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