Ugh. Husband Would Rather I Smoke Analogs.. :(

[Mrs C]

I can think of 2 reasons for his behavior right away.

1 He's actually worried that he will made fun of in the way he's referring to it. Let him know there are actual e pipes. Nothing sissy at all about a nice pipe.

2 Deep down he has reservations about his ability to make the switch or he isn't ready yet. By sabotaging you, it takes that pressure off him. It just could be that you need to just say "I'll do my thing and you do yours", and leave it be. Show him with your success that it can be done.

 

[Sugar_and_Spice]

awww, I feel for you. I would sit him down and tell him that you are doing this for your health, and has nothing to do with him. You would like his support, but even if he is unwilling, you are doing this for you. A healthier you means you will be around longer. If he is still unwilling to back off, then you may have unwittingly uncovered a much deeper problem in your relationship. I hope that is not the case, but sometimes it does happen. Most people are relucant to change and it scares them. Help him to see that his unwillingness to help you is damaging to your relationship. I do hope his need to control you or your actions doesn't turn into something worse. Be educated about the ecigs by going to the CASAA link that has already been given to you by earlier posters or just click on my signature.
Good luck and let us know how it goes.

 

[Fyerwall]

So I have been vaping for less than a week and off analogs for almost 72 hours. It's been an interesting ride to say the least. Finding the right juice has been a challenge. I'm not that happy with the setup I have but it's working ok for now. I've had some pretty bad side effects from either withdrawals or overconsuming nicotine. I haven't quite figured out if the uneasiness and jitters I am feeling is a nicotine craving or a symptom of me over vaping. I'm working on it, but I DO know that I can't stand the smell of analogs anymore and I NEVER want to smoke them again.

My husband on the other hand keeps throwing news articles he finds on the internet at me that say E-cigs are dangerous, unregulated, and JUST as addictive as cigarettes, PLUS, he says I look ridiculous sucking on a huge chrome (Dildo) as he calls it, and then he says he would rather I just smoke regular smokes.

So, help me convince him that this is indeed BETTER than smoking analogs. I have told him everything I know (Which admittedly isn't much) and directed him to lots of sites but he is still on my back and his nasty comments are really getting to me.

Even some of my friends are on my side and want to try e-cigs. He still says it's dumb looking and it doesn't matter to him he just thinks what he thinks an that's that.

Has anyone encountered a spouse who was anti-vaping and if so how did you handle it??

Thanks!!

It takes a while for some people to accept change. And there will be a period where someone will fight tooth and nail to prevent change before realizing change isn't all that bad.

Best thing to do is stand your ground, but try not to start an all out fight. Just be firm in your position and let him know that you are sticking with it regardless of what he likes/doesn't like. Just avoid tit-for-tat arguments on the subject; they lead nowhere.

One thing that might help is to not dramatically change your routines with him. If you both went outside at the same time for a smoke, still go out and have one with him - you puff away on your vape while he has his cig. It might just be that along with being a closet smoker as you say, he might feel that your vaping is going to exclude him from moments with you. Don't make him feel left out. I had to do the same with my girlfriend for a while. I made the mistake of stopping going out with her for a smoke and it kinda hurt her, making her feel alone and excluded. So I started going back out on the porch with her and she slowly became more accepting of my ecig. Eventually she became willing to give it an honest try. Today she is trying to convince her mother and brother to give them a shot. It takes time, just don't make them feel alienated.

If you have any vape shops in your area, convince him to go to one with you. Most of them have an incredibly knowledgeable staff who will be willing to answer any questions he might have as well as be able to correct any misinformation he may have read. (plus if hes a gadget type of guy, the shiny mods might pique his interest and help you in the long run )

And make sure to point him to sites like casaa.org so he can get some facts.

 

[nmackan]

My friend I congratulate you about your decision and insistence despite your husband. First of all dont feel lonely or unique everyone confronts same difficulties. Now than if you still crave for cigarettes you have down nicotine on the other hand if you are dizy, have cold sweat, headache you are up nicotine decide yoursef.
Now for the safety of the e-cigs (I tell this 3rd time but it was/is effective)

Somebody told me that e-cigs are more dangerous than actual cigarettes. "So I heard" I tod him vaping a huge vape on his face "But why are you still vaping than?" he asked I told him "I do not answer silly questions but I will tell you"
"Is there glycerin in your cigarette?" He did not know "Yes there is" I answered "it will keep your tobacco damp"
Franky I dont know if there is glycol in your cigarette but it is used largely in industry sweatener of most cakes or confectionary
Now we come to the nicotine. There is nicotine in your cigarette too.
There are 497 more chemicals in your cigarettes without even burning. By vaping I get 497 less than cigarettes.
Now the pathetic part you burn them while I was heating mine. you know when I inhale I get glycerin, gycol and nicotine do you know what you get after burning yours? oh 4000 chemicals, 400 deadly, 50 carcinogen. So as in my religious quote My religion to me, your religion to you. My vape to me your smoke to you

Most of the people hearing this lecture ask me where he/she can get them

Still my wife was excited in the beginning and used them for about a fortnight but after her aunt warned her that they are more dangerous (in my country it is worse because the son of PM importing chantix) so she turned back to analogs. Even though she sees the pozitive difference of my health she still smokes.
Read more about e-cigs. You wil see there are still better liquids and devices to enjoy.

 

[Jay-dub]

This is weird. I thought guys liked gadgets and would like the fact that they get to add two things together - nicotine delivery and an excuse to tinker. My wife still smokes analogues and it's getting pretty gross. The smell and taste. Bleh. Maybe he's worried about being gross if he can't follow you into vaping. I'm sure you've gotten plenty of advice here but ultimately it's your health, your body and your decision. Tell him that if you don't get his support he's gotta sleep sometime.

 

[danc13]

Just like your husband i was always for some reason hating on vaporizers and ecigs as i was a smoker and enjoyed just sticking to that. I would mess with my friends who had ecigs all the time telling them ecigs were unsafe because of the fact they are unregulated by the government and did not even understand how they worked or what e juice was. I look back on those days and just shake my head at how i use to act towards vaporizers and their users. After trying many methods of quitting tobacco i decided to try e cigs and found it was the only thing that actually kept me from smoking and started to grow a liking for it. I too got much criticism for my switch but have come to realize that i need to do what evers best for me. I feel theres alot of negativity spread out there about ecigarettes because of the fact that they are in fact unregulated but that dosent mean their in all that bad. Look at the tobacco industry for example, regulation from the government and production being dominated by few big tobacco companies has only made cigarettes more addictive and dangerous and i feel the same will happen if and when the government steps in and takes control of this industry followed by waves of articles about how great for you and health ecigarettes are. Do what you think is best for you, not what others do because from what iv seen the people talking down on vaporizing are most of the time in lack of knowledge of the subject and rather misinformed.

 

[wv2win]

...................
If you have any vape shops in your area, convince him to go to one with you. Most of them have an incredibly knowledgeable staff who will be willing to answer any questions he might have as well as be able to correct any misinformation he may have read. (plus if hes a gadget type of guy, the shiny mods might pique his interest and help you in the long run )

And make sure to point him to sites like casaa.org so he can get some facts.

I'm not against B & M's, but most I have been too are not nearly as knowledgeable as your average active member on ECF. In fact, some are actually quite ignorant about how vaping works, what works, what doesn't, etc. It's still worth checking them out, however.

 

[Mark Anthony]

Hi Cat and welcome to our forum, where you will find all of the info and support that you need. There are tons of posts on here about all of the dangerous ingredients found in cigarettes. When your husband goes into one of his speeches on why he doesn't want you to vape, ask him to read them. I hope for your sake he will and begin to understand, but I don't know.... sometimes you can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink. Whatever you do, don't go back to the analogs... it's your life and your health that matters... so as far as I see it, it is his problem, not yours. It's been 3 days since you've smoked and your senses will start returning, your lung capacity will increase and you will feel so much better. How do I know? Because most of us have walked down the same path that you are going down now, and there is light at the end of that tunnel. Good luck to you... and remember... you have a good support system here when you need it.

 

[cags]

I don't know why people who get married or even engaged often think that makes them the other person's mommy or daddy
my husband whined about my smoking (I always wondered why on earth did he marry a smoker). when I started vaping he started making little noises about it. I just looked at him one day and said "well, you will never be happy will you" he shut up after that
I would just do my best to ignore him - I use blank stares a lot lol - and do what you need to do (I've given up trying to convince or educate people)

 

[bigrf85]

the only comments my wife gave me is that my bigger mods (mvp2 and zmax) just look rediculous. but i would think a long strong talk with your spouse would go a long way and to do research together to full get him and yourself fully educated and definitely read into the financial supporters of the research before taking negative findings to heart. and i would definitely let him fully know that the negative comments are not needed or approved of by yourself. see if you cant get to a common ground through education and communication.

hope this helps

 

[Bubblegum]

- You smell better than he does!!

- There's 4000+ chemicals in analogs

There's 3-4 in e-cigs!

Sent from my GT-I9500 using Tapatalk

 

[rhean]

I think the problem is that he was a "closet" smoker, meaning he would always come outside with me when I smoked and take a few puffs. Now that I'm not doing that anymore he is smoking alone. He tried my e-cig and said it tasted awful. I even offered to let him try some of my other juices in different tanks and he said no. He wasn't interested.

I handed him my last three packs of analogs two days ago and said, Have fun. I'm done with them.

I'm sure in time he will come around but I don't need this crap while I'm trying myself to quit. I've never had anyone act this way about me trying to quit.

He said that if I really wanted to quit smoking I would just quit everything and it's all in my mind, then he said his friend had great luck with Chantix. (A drug that is known to cause people to off themselves, no thanks.)

I just don't get it. I'm going to muscle through it. He's not raining on my smoke free parade. LOL

I can't imagine any spouse trying to discourage a healthier lifestyle, not to mention CHEAPER lifestyle.

Is your husband an all or nothing kind of person? Is he normally controlling? His recommending Chantix is weird. He's obviously the type to get online and read things, and what's online for Chantix is bloodcurdling--suicide ideation, occasionally permanent personality change, violence, depression, insomnia, nightmares, etc...yikes.

Keep vaping. It's healthier than smoking, but your sticking to your guns could also be healthy for your relationship.

 

[T0rtitude]

Don't give him the satisfaction of having an audience. If he starts making comments, just walk away. It's not your job to educate him and a lot of people don't want to be educated. He clearly has it in his head that vaping is bad for whatever reason that he's not admitting to you, so he is going to seek out information that supports his ulterior motive.

My husband still smokes. I tried to get him to vape but he's just not into it. He loves that I don't smoke anymore. Although I hate how much he stinks. Tobacco smoke really does permeate everything, even skin and hair. No matter how much you shower, it remains. I will sometimes go on the porch and vape while he smokes just to spend time with him but lately I'm more hesitant to do it because I hate having my clothes stink.

Once your husband stops shooting you down though, maybe you could go out to vape while he smokes. In time he will come around, but in the meantime absolutely do not tolerate his negative comments. You are doing something wonderful for yourself that's going to benefit you for the rest of your life. He does not have the right to sabotage that.

 

[Madtypist]

just do whats good for you....thats what im doing, and am so much better off for it....

 

[Faylool]

F that's the way he is its best to learn how to really just ignore him. Easier said than done but if he thinks he can push buttons by being on the "wrong page" he won't stop. He might even respect you for not letting his opinion change your choices, which are indisputably very very good. Don't sweat it

 

[Faylool]

Or...GROH

"Get rid of husband"

Joke. I'm on a roll from other posts

 

[504_Brunhileld]

From what I deduct, neither is really that awesome for you but one has to pick the lesser of evils. 4k+ chemicals or pg/vg and flavoring and nicotine. No brainer but less is better. this is a case where e>a or p>$7.00 /20 N!/n-1 in cost of habit. Simple statistic show that the ecigs are cheaper and lesser evil. Can't tell people what to do but, I can state cheaper is an answer we all love alot more.

 

[504_Brunhileld]

I like that one re roll, botch on husband XP. Yea I am bit of a gamer, loves my table top dice games. Sorry if that offended. was only trying to cheer up.

 

[RosaJ]

I have not read the whole thread, I'm sure there's plenty of good advice as always. My gut feeling after I read your original post is that the problem is not your not smoking, but his personality and a sense of inferiority because you have been able to quit cigarettes. Maybe you didn't notice it before, but now he's directing it towards you.

If on the other hand you've been having withdrawals from cigarettes and he's aware of it, he may be trying to "take care of it" and he's tired of hearing the complaints. So going back to cigarettes is worth your feeling happy.

Please don't be offended, I do not mean it to be. I don't know either of you, it's just my first impression and also "shooting from the hip."

 

[Dakota Jim]

I agree with just about everybody on him trying to sabotage your switching from cigs to vaping

I went through a similar problem with my mother when I quit drinking right up until she died from drinking (My sisters and I did all get to visit her 2 weeks before it happened and she actually seemed ok for the 3 days we were at her house)

Hold strong to your decision - whichever decision you make