Hello peeps! I've been off of ECF for around a week because I felt like a hypocrite posting in my regular thread while I was puffing away on a cigarette XD
My story - I left the USA a few years ago, joined ECF for a recipe to make my own nicotine from patches I'd taken with me. 24mg menthol nicotine and one of the cigalikes I'd packed helped me quit. Then I came back to the USA, started smoking again, came back to ECF and started buying a new breed of PVs and juice than had NOT been around in 2008-2009. In December of 2012 I quit smoking cold turkey and was feeling magnificent
vaping, breathing, walking up stairs, no chest congestion when I inhaled, you name it and it was better. I dropped my nicotine content pretty quick because the nicotine is really rough on my throat where VG and PG both give me no problems. Anyway, I moved, stressed out with some issues at my apartment complex, have a roomie that is a smoker and this last week, my 'couple' of cigs a day went to 2.5 packs =] Whoo! Big crash when I fell out of the vape wagon! I just had to take note each time I lit up to see EXACTLY how many I was sucking down =] Anyway, I logged back on and told my buddies on my regular thread and one said, join this thread... don't just drop ECF and your buddies out of shame
So, I am HERE! I fell off of the wagon! Throat is killing me! When I breath out as much air as I can it sounds like a bubbling brook and then I need to cough! The D A M N E D tar they put in cigs and the other carp is H E L L on a pair of lungs! But I light up when I go to work, light up when I am coming home from work, and I sit at the table and smoke with the roomie! ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I typically work nights and will be on days for a month, so I've got some plans to re-evaluate some stress issues I have =] I just mixed up a magnificent menthol tobacco, turkish tobacco, super concentrated menthol, and some chai tea 36mg juice. I have chain vaped 15ml in the last couple of hours and only had 1 cigarrete - tasted like isht as usual, but the juice is calling me back whether I am smoking or not... I have even found myself smoking AND vaping at the same time because the juice tastes so much better than the 'ashy taste' of the cheapo cigs I force myself to smoke =] Ever had 1 month of cigs? NASTY!!! And if I want to smoke a cig, then that's what I get
Anyway, I am here and hope we can get through this together... I am not interested in people popping on here with cold turkey success stories, I want to know who else fell off the wagon and knows what I feel like - disgusted, ashamed, and ...... off for not being able to handle the stress without the calming effects of smoking a cigarette. And those nasty bastids DO CALM ME!
So, I have a month on days and am reading some books on dealing with life's issues, staying calm, and chanting 'Nam Myoho Renge Kyo' =] Oddly enough, I am Catholic, but not overly religious and chanting that Nam Myoho Renge Kyo slowly just eases the tension out of my shoulders somehow =] I dunno why, but it's pretty nice
Greetings and good you find you,
Mellisa aka Lisa N Central TX - you can call me Lisa =]