So this past weekend, I went up to see my mom with my kids. We had lunch out on her porch. She has about 35 acres in southern Mississippi. It was nice.
My mom knows I vape. I've been doing it almost two years now. She says to me after lunch "you know, those things aren't good for you either, I heard they are just as bad, maybe worse". So being pretty well informed on vaping I was about to launch into my defense. I said to her "where didd you hear this?". She says "on the news". Then I started to speak again but she cut me off "I don't want to hear any of your THEORIES". And waves me off.
My mother is an otherwise very sweet, caring, thoughtful person. She'd do anything for me or my kids, etc. Salt of the earth.
This really ticked me off. To the point that the rest of the visit was ruined.
Here's why:
In the last 6 months, I've run two half-marathons. I run 20 miles a week. I bike another 30-50 and lift weights 2-3 times a week. I think I'm in pretty good shape for being 41. I eat healthy foods for the most part.
My mom, for lack of a better term is probably medically obese. Now, I could, if I wanted to...berate her every time I saw her about the fact that she's 50 lbs overweight and that she and not me is the one who's abusing her health.
I don't hate fat people and the point of my post isn't to hassle or gang up on anyone who's fat. We all make our choices in life. If my mom enjoys ice cream or meatballs or bacon, I really don't care. You can't live life without enjoying what you enjoy. If she doesn't want to exercise, well that's her choice as a grown adult. I'm not going to come over and bother her about it.
What is the point of this post vape nerd? I can hear you all asking.
I guess the only point is, am I wrong in feeling this way?
Or maybe the point is, what should I say to her next time this comes up?
I'm ruminating on it and I know that isn't good. I love my mother. She's wonderful. I wish I could stop being angry about it.
I'm the FIRST person I know to admit when I am wrong. I want to make that statement first, so you understand things in context.
However, my mind is like a sponge, and I believe knowledge should be cherished. With that said, pretty much any hobby, hobbit, or anything I take up or do, I allow myself to soak it all in.....to sit in the center of it, and to truly understand whatever it is I choose to allow into my life.
Vaping is no exception. Like must of us here, I like to know as much as I can. With that in mind, I have to ask what you are asking in specific? Do you want more knowledge to be better prepared to confront your mother next time she mentions it?
I don't think that will help. I also don't think you are lacking in knowledge. It sounds like you need to make a choice. Are you going to just let her speak her peace, and do your best to not focus on the incident?
If it bothered you so much that you came on here to post about it, you probably should take another approach, although I don't think "educating" her will help much. Some people, especially eldery people, watch the news constantly, and consider it a viable source of information. Us younger ones, in our late 20s and younger, understand the News is nothing more than propaganda pieces, often times (most times) written with a bias, and PROMOTED with a bias agenda.
If your mother doesn't see that, she probably won't listen to anything you have to say. I wouldn't mention her weight or health problems, because really it isn't the issue.
The issue is your mother believing what she hears on the news. If that is the case, there isn't much you can do, besides speak your OWN peace.....in a positive and brief manner.
Let her know that vaping is more or less safe......and that her OPINION that vaping is possibly MORE harmful than smoking cigs.....is a THEORY.....just like she claimed she DIDNT want to hear from you.
I've gotten to the point that I'm afraid to say hardly anything to my 25 year old lest I "once again" offend him ... I guess it just depends on how much you want to "win" this one ...
