aha, thanks wfa! lol
unfertilized = not pregnant
unfertilized = not pregnant
A guy comes home and tells his wife he wants to buy the new SSGGTS plus the new VV Module for it and the iAtty2.
The wife replies... "Honey, we can hold off on that. I need the extra money for that new breast cream to make them bigger for you. Just think of it as a present from me to you "
The husband replies... "No honey, I want the new GGs and if I don't get them right away there is no telling when I'll be able to get them again."
The wife says... "But the cream is on sale and if I don't get it right away it'll cost double."
The husband stops and thinks for a minute and replies... "What do you need that breast enlargement cream for anyway. You know it's just snake oil anyway! All you need to make your breasts bigger is toilet paper."
The wife looks at him with a confused look on her face... "Do you mean stuff by bras with TP, they need more than than dear. I'm not a teenager anymore you know!"
The husband replies... "No dear, that is not at all what I meant. I mean you just have to rub your breasts with it!! You've been wiping your ... with it for years and look how big it got!!"
This member of the GG family has not been heard from in weeks
Little Johnny sees his Daddy's car passing the playground and going into the woods.
Curious, he follows the car and sees Daddy and Aunt Jane kissing.
Johnny finds this so exciting and can barely contain himself as he runs home and starts to tell his mother excitedly.
"MOMMY, MOMMY, I WAS AT THE PLAYGROUND AND DADDY AND...."
Mommy tells him to slow down, but that she wants to hear the story.
So Johnny tells her. "I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went to look and Daddy was giving Aunt Jane a big kiss, then he helped her take off her shirt, then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt Jane laid down on the seat, then Daddy...."
At this point, Mommy cut him off and said, "Johnny, this is such an interesting story, suppose you save the rest of it for supper time. I want to see the look on Daddy's face when you tell it tonight."
At the dinner table, Mommy asks Johnny to tell his story.
He describes the car into the woods, the undressing, laying down on the seat, and, "Then Daddy and Aunt Jane did that same thing Mommy and Uncle Jeff used to do when Daddy was in the Army."
--
Five Important Qualities
1. It's important to have a woman, who helps at home and has a job.
2. It's important to have a woman, who can make you laugh.
3. It's important to have a woman, who you can trust and who doesn't lie to you.
4. It's important to have a woman, who is good in bed and who likes to be with you.
5. It's very, very important that these four women do not know each other.
hahahahahahahahaha very good rick!!!!
ps....... are you married?
Five Important Qualities
1. It's important to have a woman, who helps at home and has a job.
2. It's important to have a woman, who can make you laugh.
3. It's important to have a woman, who you can trust and who doesn't lie to you.
4. It's important to have a woman, who is good in bed and who likes to be with you.
5. It's very, very important that these four women do not know each other.
Five Important Qualities
1. It's important to have a woman, who helps at home and has a job.
2. It's important to have a woman, who can make you laugh.
3. It's important to have a woman, who you can trust and who doesn't lie to you.
4. It's important to have a woman, who is good in bed and who likes to be with you.
5. It's very, very important that these four women do not know each other.
Ha! Married? That's the funniest Joke in this thread (No )
The elderly Italian man went to his parish priest and asked if the priest would hear his confession.
"Of course, my son," said the priest.
"Well, Father, at the beginning of World War Two, a beautiful woman knocked on my door and asked me to hide her from the Germans; I hid her in my attic, and they never found her."
"That's a wonderful thing, my son, and nothing that you need to confess," said the priest.
"It's worse, Father; I was weak, and told her that she had to pay for rent of the attic with her sexual favors," continued the old man.
"Well, it was a very difficult time, and you took a large risk - you would have suffered terribly at their hands if the Germans had found you hiding her; I know that God, in his wisdom and mercy, will balance the good and the evil, and judge you kindly," said the priest.
"Thanks, Father," said the old man. "That's a load off of my mind. Can I ask another question?"
"Of course, my son," said the priest.
The old man asked, "Do I need to tell her that the war is over?"