Chit Chattin away!

[Darkwitless]

BMontgomery - the whole bedtime process may take a while to break her of bad habits. You and Beth will have to be stronger will than she is.

She's figured out what works to stall bedtime. Stand your ground. There will be tears. Hopefully hers and not yours. Trust me, when it comes to bed time around here, I was ruthless. Include her in the discussion of how bedtime will work. If she's part of the discussion you can throw it back on her when she whines - but Livi, you agreed we'd only have 2 stories. (Offer 1 when doing the "plan" and see if she negotiates for another.)
We did story time in their beds. It got them where they needed to be. (in bed) and set the scene for quiet time.

Make a poster - (This is what we did)
bath (DH normally was in charge of baths)
pj's on (check)
brush teeth (check)
drink (check)
story (we had a 2 story limit - because we were putting 3 kids to bed at one point)
prayers (yep - they were simple - God Bless Mommy & Daddy, Grandma's & Grandpa's, Brothers, Friends & all God's creatures. And help me grow up happy, healthy strong and wise. Amen ) Seriously, that was their bedtime prayer word for word. It covered all the bases - so when they tried to extend it (and yes, she will and add the puppy next door and the baby bunnies under the deck...etc - covers the bases)

After prayers we were done. If they got out of bed, no Dora or dessert or snack or whatever the next day. whatever would traumatize them the most. It's the one time punishment wasn't immediate in our house hold. Normally if you broke a rule or did something wrong, punishment followed immediately because they had to be able to tie what they did wrong with the consequence.

It took a week or so for it to sink in that we meant it (with #1) We'd just keep walking him back to bed. Say goodnight and leave. I even threatened to put a baby gate on his door (we did with his youngest brother - the monkey was quiet! and sneaky!)

Bedtime was sacred. DH & I needed our time to wind down and talk etc.

 

[markfm]

We're wired to be productive, just tough to do the list while also reserving weekends for together time. DW and the four footed kids aren't invited to be in the area while I've got the power tools out, I like having all 10 fingers

 

[Darkwitless]

DS#1 is finally signed for college and dorm. Now to get orientation set up.

So glad he finally made a decision. It's his cheapest option (WOOT!) and is a good program. Just weird to really think that in August he'll be gone and probably won't live here full time ever again. Though as DH says - the goal is for him to never live here again! lol

 

[oldsoldier]

power tool time can double as alone time That way you can squeeze something personal into the productive time. I learned long ago that "helping daddy" just turns a simple job into something "else" until the kids a e actually mature enough to understand what helps and what doesn't.

Have fun with the dog house!

 

[Darkwitless]

Mark - LOL - It depends on the project - but DH has been trying to teach the boys how to do some stuff (and keep their fingers) I'm the one who has to leave the area because of my nervous pacing. He said I remind him of a wild animal who's babies have fallen down the mine shaft.

The next on the list is re-staining and sealing the deck. I did it last a couple of years ago and it desperately needs it again. A couple of the boards need to be replaced too. I wish we could replace all of them with the newer fake stuff, but that's not in the budget for a Loooong time (see previous post!) lol

 

[oldsoldier]

dw, the synthetic decking material is really good stuff and I agree that it is a bit pricey. In the end though the lack of maint over the years makes it worth the expense (IMHO). People don't realize what an investment in labor a deck is over the years. Until they neglect it for long enough and have to pay it out in cash and sweat all at once. (Guilty as charged here on this one!)

 

[markfm]

I do everything with real wood, find it satisfying. The deck is a quickie, Thompson's cedar tone water seal, wifie can do that one. Unfortunately the the porch decking is coming up for a redo, and that's solid stain -- stripping, priming, then staining, blech. I'd replace the porch decking with new wood, but we have the spa on it, a big monster, PITA to disconnect the electricity, shovel it around. If I do decide to do that one, it'll be composite.

 

[oldsoldier]

oh i agreeabout working with real wood. unfortunately my deck disaster was an inherited one stained wood that had been neglected for some time before I took over the property and neglected it further. If I build another deck it would be cedar or quite possibly teak -- but then again that's even more pricey than composite.

There really is nothing quite like working with wood. I find it even more satisfying than fabricating from metal. There is just something about the whole process that makes it more "organic" and enjoyable.

 

[daisyd]

Good Morning!!

Mine always had a sippy cup of water on the night stand.

This is what we still do with our two older ones. Removing the excuses as valid is the best way. Don't give in mommy. Every time you give in it will take that much longer next time.

 

[daisyd]

Well B - give a snack half hour before bed and a drink right before tucking her in- you have to think a few steps ahead by removing her stalling tactics. Is there a tv in her room? Maybe having her favorite show on or DVD for half hour (playing softly) with it made clear that if she doesn't settle down for sleep -OFF it goes - and be prepared to do it! (and the subsequent tantrum that follows) - she'll learn quick.

If she starts once the show is over - time to learn about consequences - no show next night / 3 year olds can be reasoned with more .... Action/reaction

What makes 3 year olds so tough is that while they can be reasoned with they also can be defiant / she's pushing the envelope - she needs to know where the lines are.

I have a friend who's 3 year old granddaughter didn't care if she was punished - the kid was smart as a whip too / so since Riley was indifferent to punishment my friend punished her favorite stuffed animal instead! It worked! (sat that toy in the corner!-Riley was beside herself!)

Wish I had thought of that! Ds is like that. I took away ALL of his toys once at that age. He played with a piece of string...happily. Now, he'd rather get sent to the principal than sit in class. He's perfectly content to sit in the corner in the office and do nothing.

 

[Darkwitless]

Daisy - you might need to point that out to the Principal! lol I'm sure if s/he, you and the teacher put your heads together you can come up with a different plan.

DS#1's teacher put a desk right in the front all by itself. No friends to talk to etc.

We had threatened him with one of us attending school him all day if he didn't straighten out and fly right. Told him that we'd tell his classmates we were there because he couldn't behave and needed a babysitter. Oddly enough, he only had a couple more minor issues. That and sitting in a chair facing the wall while we all were watching TV (which he'd been grounded from) seem to work.

Different things work for different kids. And if (by any chance) your kiddlet is adhd, sometimes what worked today won't work tomorrow! UGH - Not my kid, but a dear friend's. She had to change things all the time, because her daughter would decide she liked the "punishment".

We had a Principal at our 1st school who gave candy when you came to the office. No matter why you were sent, you got to pick a piece. (face palm) She was a complete marshmallow. Thankfully it was only pre-school - 3rd grade.

Heck, I'm still afraid to go to the Principal's office.

 

[quittin4mykids]

Found out my middle boy got 4th place in the Intermediate B division at the state archery tourney in March and my oldest got 5th in the Intermediate C Division. This was their first ever competition-

 

[BiancaMontgomery]

Holy yay! We've been trying to grow grass in our grassless backyard and guess what! It's sprouting!

Wow, I need to get out more.

Off to water the sprouts!

 

[BiancaMontgomery]

Q, that's awesome!! Yay Q's kids!!

NOW off to water!

 

[Darkwitless]

Congrats Q!!

How cool!

 

[BiancaMontgomery]

Bed time tonight....SO MUCH BETTER, She's been peacefully sleeping since 7:30! I had to take her upstairs kicking and screaming, I remained calm (on the outside ). She refused to brush her teeth. OK, fine. I saved my energy for wrestling her into her pull-up. Pull-up on: check! Refused PJ's. OK, fine. I only said one thing: "Do you want one book or two?" She stopped whining/crying and said: "Five books." I said again: "Do you want one book or two?" She said: "Two." I let her pick both books, read them to her and rocked her for about 10 minutes. She was out! When I put her in her bed, she woke up "I don't want to lay down!" I said: "I'm going to lay here with you." She said "Oh, ok." and was right back out!!! *throws streamers*

 

[quittin4mykids]

mine told me "Mom its time to do to bed- I's tired" after he brought me the benadryl cause he was sneezing.

when I ignored him, he crawled up in his daddy's lap and said "DAAAADDDD pwease wets doe to bed- my back needs to be strait"...

When we both told him "IN a few minutes" he crawled up in my recliner with me, fell asleep in about 3 minutes and is now sleeping on the couch- SOOOOOO I am running to bed to try to get my pillow before the dog and hubby are both fighting over it, for the few hours that he will sleep on the couch before he comes and gets in the bed.

 

[BiancaMontgomery]

I gotta get my puny wife off the couch, poor thing has a vicious cold. We better get to bed cause with Livi going so early, she'll be up early too.

Night night PIF!

 

[keyzygirl]

Good Morning Wonderful PIFers!!

B,I hope you got to sleep all night!!

 

[markfm]

Don't mention grass, that just reminds me I need to get the new cart and order a couple yards of topsoil

(Fenced backyard is where the dirt's needed, have to get it dumped in the front. I should see if the pooches want to play dogsled-haulers.)