I'm Not Sure What I'm Doing Anymore

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Wolfenstark

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Look at it like this - You choose not to do something rather than say to yourself you can't do something.
I feel it lowers the pressure.
When the equipment doesn't behave itself and you want to give it away then think what would you do if a smoke was acting the same , would you do more to make it work , have you in the past ?

Have no smokes in the house and think of going out to get any as a task you don't want to do.

People make allowances for something they like or are use to or addicted to but these can be substituted.
Try to lower pressure on yourself.
 

HauntedMyst

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Roto, let me tell you a story I think will help. When I was kid, I wanted nothing more than to be a Navy Seal. As I grew up, middle school, high school, college, I wanted nothing more than to be a Navy Seal. So I trained. I ran. I did push ups and pull ups. I lifted weights. I learned marksmanship. I took marshal arts training until I was a black belt in Kung Fu, Karate and Tae Kwon Do. The one thing I forgot to do was learn to swim. I have a terrible fear of getting in the water (I mean, have people seen Jaws?). Turns out to be a Navy Seal, you have to know how to swim! I kept telling them "Come on! There has to be one guy who says in the boat!" They said no and kicked me out of the navy and now I work night shift at the sewer treatment plant in Chicago. So yeah. Dreams can come true.
 

six

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This got said a few times in this thread, but I'm going to put it a little differently:

The thing about vaping is that it is not smoking. It is something entirely different. There are things about smoking that will never be replaced by vaping. -- For me, there were two things that really hung me up and made me struggle. 1) Even after ~4.5 years, I can still sometimes feel a cigarette between my fingers (usually stress triggers it, but sometimes not). It took me a couple of years to throw away the open pack that was on my desk. I found it more difficult to be out of smokes than I found it to not smoke.

The other thing about vaping is that *because it is something entirely different*, it can be whatever you want it to be. I made it something relaxing - I made it something I look forward to and enjoy constantly instead of something I need. I made a decision about what vaping would be for me... and I knew I really didn't want it to be the same as smoking.

I was immediately successful. By that, I mean I never used tobacco again after the very first drag on an e-cig. --- What I *do not* mean by that is that it was without stress or without struggle. As I mentioned, even now, I can sometimes actually feel a cigarette between my fingers. Something in my brain still hangs on to that addiction so strongly that I can actually feel it as if it was really there. Seems a little nuts, but I bet most former smokers can relate.

As others said, there's no need to be hard on yourself. Everyone here knows how difficult stopping smoking is. There's no method and no magic to make leaving tobacco behind easy... but I truly believe your best shot is with vaping.
 

pufZeppelin

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hey roto :)

you can do it, just hang in there and keep going about it as you are

it will come, no need to be to tuff on yourself

all of a sudden, just one day YOU WON'T WANT A STINKIE CIG anymore...

just keep your gear working, keep good juice

then it will happen, when go to have a CIG, you'll RATHER have a VAPE

it's different for each of us, your time will come...

also I'd try some 24 mg and a good RY4 (yum !)

- http://www.primevaping.com/tobacco-...ypage_images.tpl&product_id=90&category_id=28


Good Luck - You WILL do it

:p
 

alicewonderland

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this was exactly how it was when i started, and i started back when there was no variable voltage, and egos were the new craze. we used horrible tasting cartomizers and wimpy dripping atomizers. it took a lot of willpower to keep me from buying cigarettes, and sometimes my willpower wasn't strong enough, but i kept trying. New products started to come out, the silver bullet, the boge cartomizers, clearomizers, new stuff to try to search for that better, more satisfying vape. When I look back at it now, it was my enthusiasm for vaping that eventually weened me off cigarettes completely. The experience and vape quality of the early years when vaping was just beginning didn't even come close to the satisfaction of lighting up a cigarette and taking that long much needed drag.

Lucky for you, vaping is in its prime, with new products coming out constantly, every month, every week a product is released that competes and sometimes better than what we had earlier. Instead of waiting months or years for a better vape, you don't have to wait at all now. There are many products and setups for everyone. Whether you are the hobbyist with deep pockets, or the thrifty vaper, you can find a satisfying vape as long as you do the research or get the help and advice you need to get what you need to fight off the habit. As long as you are willing to fight off an addiction, i'm sure you'll have an army of people here who are willing to help and fight it with you, as many of us know and feel what you are going through right now, we've been through it and you're not alone.
 

UncleChuck

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Rotowoman,

Have you considered using Snus in place of cigarettes when you need something more than vaping? It's far less harmful than cigarettes (and American chewing tobacco) but still gives you all the other wonderful alkaloids in tobacco. If you get the portion snus it comes in small tea-bag like pouches that you use in your upper lip so you don't spit like with American chewing tobacco. General Snus, the brand, is available at a lot of corner markets and tobacco stores around the US and is an authentic snus, not the crap the American companies have been releasing as "snus" which is very very weak and still contains a higher amount of carcinogens compared to authentic snus.

A lot of people have a negative view of smokeless tobacco so I'm not sure if you have considered it before, but I'd strongly suggest looking into it if vaping isn't cutting it for you and you find yourself smoking. If you are using tobacco anyway, might as well make it a safer version than Cigarettes. Keeping a tin around (well, many tins now ;) ) has kept me from buying cigarettes many, many times. I've been vaping for years and don't have hardware issues anymore, I have juices that I love, but sometimes I just need something more.

If you can't find the General in stores around you but want to try it send me a private message, I have sealed tins of many general flavors and I'd happily send you one out for free, I know exactly what you are going through and snus is a godsend IMHO for these situations.

To repeat what others said do NOT beat yourself up about it! Think of the cigarettes you didn't smoke, not the ones you did.

Good luck!
 

AndriaD

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As I mentioned, even now, I can sometimes actually feel a cigarette between my fingers. Something in my brain still hangs on to that addiction so strongly that I can actually feel it as if it was really there. Seems a little nuts, but I bet most former smokers can relate.

heh... it's like a phantom limb that's been amputated, isn't it! I've only had that experience in dreams, but damn it's so real. I wake up, and I'm grateful all over again that it's just a dream, not really real!

Roto... I hate to hear you're having such a hard time. Come on over to the Still Smoking Support and Chat Thread, if no one else has mentioned that yet, if you haven't been there yet -- I dunno, haven't seen anything from that thread in a few days. But when I had my little backslide episode in the summer, they were so helpful, so understanding, and gave me a safe place to beat myself up a little about smoking again, when I'd been smoke-free for 3 1/2 months and just threw it away because of my stupid appendix, even though they assured me there was no reason to beat myself up; this really is hard, and it's different for everyone; we all have to go at our own pace, to really make it work for us individually -- if you try to be like another person, you just fail, and if you try to quit like another person, that usually won't work either -- we all have to find our own way, at our own pace. You'll get it, because you want to! :thumb:

Andria
 

wizardofozone

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Rotowoman, being a newbie I hesitated to post this 'advice' in front of so many of my Mentors ... But Nermal hinted at it best. and I want to not hint at all and state flatb out that Senior smokers have this licked not only by the advantage of lifespans but also because the whole reason for quitting has now become a several forked path ...

It depends on what you think the reason for quitting should be ? What have we Seniors suffered from, nicotine in and of itself or the tars and factory chemicals in the store bought cigs we've used for years ? If your turning back to packs and packs of cigarettes it wouldn't hurt to just 'wallow' in nicotine vaping ... buy a high dose of nicotine laced eliquid, and even that has to be better than going back to 3 packs a day of analogs .... I'm on a crusade now to make people finally answer the question we had usually generalized as 'smoking' ... was it the nicotine or the tobacco method of obtaining the nicotine we needed to stop ?
 

fretplayer20

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Backsliding is no problem. I would say you are asking too much of yourself that quickly. I attempted the switch for the first time and could not get into it. I had to have my tobacco cigarettes. I tried again several months later with a new device and it was a little better, but I found myself smoking again just like the first time. I took a leap of faith on a more powerful device that could deliver that rush of nicotine and give me the throat hit my previous devices lacked. I found that setup and it was a fairly easy transition from there. Equipment problems, I would say, are a huge hindrance to staying on the train. If you're frustrated with the "how", then you have that fallback of smoking. You obviously have no issues with lighting a piece of paper, so that familiarity is easy slide back into without much thought.

The key for me was finding something close enough to the old feeling of smoking that gave me no trouble ... something I could pick up at any time and it would work. Once I had this, I found the want for traditional smoking would taper off more and more each day. Smoking is a very strong habit. Some argue the worst of the worst when it comes to addiction, so there's no shame in needing more than one chance. Like most tasks in life, it's really unrealistic to ask of anyone that they hit the mark 100% on the first try. Human nature is trial by error and learning the way, not knowing the way. I'd say to you that just by trying to move away from tobacco you're doing an amazing job. It takes a huge amount of will power to simply purchase an electronic cigarette with the intention to stop what you're currently doing, much less to make the switch effectively. So the key things to remember are:

1. You're making a great decision to try
2. You're strong enough to get there
3. It will take time
4. It's all trial and error
5. Your gear matters to some degree, so keep trying until you find something that suits you

If it helps, everyone I know who vapes went through multiple failures before latching on completely. Just remember this ... once you do, you'll have a great sense of freedom. Your family and friends will be proud of you and you'll be proud of yourself. Don't give up ... just keep trying. You WILL find a way to make it work for you. There are tons of options available for us as a community to make this work. The community here at ECF is enough of a support group on its own to always make you feel like you're succeeding and always remind you that you are not a failure. I wish you the best of luck. You will be there soon enough.
 

Noble Gas

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Y'all, I literally had tears welling up in my eyes reading this thread. I thank each and every one of you for being SO supportive. I struggled with myself for 5 days before posting this. I've always been my own worst enemy. I smoked for about 43 years. I'm sick of it. I'm tired of being a slave to it. I've seen my health deteriorate because of it.

This community is amazing, and I am SO doggone thankful to be able to participate here. The only thing I want to give up is the cigarettes. I have backups. to backups and coils, so equipment wise, I'm going to be all right. I may up the nicotine some. I'm now at 18, but YES, this time of year is stressful as hell especially since my work schedule suddenly went from normal to I may be working just about every day until Christmas, and I'm not even in retail!!!

I cannot thank you ALL enough!!

Just before I found this thread, I was watching a collection of old tv commercials on youtube. Funny stuff. Until I got to a 1960's black and white commercial of the Flintstones advertising for Winston cigarettes. Fred and Barney kicking back having a smoke and talking about the great flavor. I quit smoking and started vaping almost a year ago due to serious health concerns, and haven't wanted a smoke - at all - until I saw that old commercial. I suddenly felt like my brain was going to explode if I didn't light up. I still have a full pack in the freezer 'just in case', and this is the first time that I actually considered opening it. It was overwhelming. I thought I had kicked those things for good.
So instead of smoking, I came over to ECF and landed on this thread. When I got to your heartfelt thanks, I also got a bit teary-eyed because all the advice I was reading was helping ME, too. By the time I finished reading all the great responses, my terrible craving had passed. So I'm adding my thanks to yours, to everyone who chimed in with support. And best of luck to you, Roto. We all know how hard it can be sometimes.
 

roxynoodle

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My other problem during those first 2 months I was dual using was the same as yours: I was fretting about it, and worried I wouldn't quit for good. Putting too much pressure on myself. Lurking here and seeing all these posts about people who quit the day they got their starter kit. I felt like a loser.

Once I quit worrying about it every day, it started to get easier. Sunday night, May 4, I had 2 cigarettes left. I smoked one and saved the other for morning. Got up May 5 and enjoyed it. I decided to see if I could get to evening without buying another pack. I did. So I wanted to see if I could go 24 hours, something I had NEVER done. And I did! I did it! Then I knew I could do it. Smoke free since :)
 

beckdg

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I had it easy this time. I had given up on quitting. Had no intentions of it. Just wanted something I could "smoke" in the house around the kids. 4 PAD leaves little room between putting one out and lighting the next. Then I decided I would vape through whatever cravings I could make it through. It was tough. I went through a nasty withdrawal. But 2 weeks later and I've been stinky free ever since. Nov. 17th this year marks a year.

I don't think I could have quit had I had the pressure of quitting being the goal.

Sent from my device.
 

Nishi

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The first 3 weeks after quitting smoking and switching to vaping, I had cravings for smokes 4 to 5 times a day, but I didn't give in. It was very difficult.

Now, after being smoke free for 4 months, I've intense cravings for smoking since the past few days. I don't know why. I haven't given in yet. I have upped the nicotine level and am vaping tobacco flavour.

Since I'm struggling to understand the hold that tobacco has on some of us, I can understand what you're going through. ECF is the best place to be.
 
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AndriaD

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There are alot of things added to cigarettes by BT to make them more addictive that eCigarettes don't provide.

We aren't just quitting tobacco, we are quiting cigarettes.

Cigarettes are an engineered product designed to create and sustain an addiction.

Nicotine is only one piece of the puzzle.

Absolute true, except that part about e-cigs not providing it -- they *can* provide it, but it requires WTA in the mix, or maybe vaping WTA ejuice "straight". Even then, there are all those actually-toxic substances (carbon monoxide, ammonia, etc) that nobody in their right mind would want to add to their vape, but some of those probably have some addiction potential too.

It really seems to come down to individual needs, individual efforts -- but having a support group like ECF helps tremendously, in so many ways -- hardware troubles, ejuice preferences and needs and mixes, and just plain moral support. Just knowing that others have been able to do this, that others have or have had the same problems, is very inspiring, and sometimes someone will post just the right thing, to make all the difference in our individual efforts.

Andria
 

RCHagy74

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It took me a year to stop dual using, and then, only because I caught a cold. Never could smoke with a cold. Cold went away, nic-urge came on, and vaping was enough from then on out.
We are all different. I use 24-18mg nic in my liquid... after two years of 36mg. I do not see a day of going lower than that.
Today is today, tomorrow, yadayadablah.
You have not given up on vaping! Call that a win and worry about cutting down on the smokes a little less.
I know worry and stress, no matter the source or kind, are still a call to light up for me (ahhh, the sweet sweet tobacco damn your siren song!).
I never saw myself cutting down on cigs, much less leaving them behind. I took about 15 months, way to much liquid to find which I liked. And as I wrote, of all things that go, yay, Virus'!
From my view, you are much further along at two months than I was at two months!
I am rooting for you!


RC Hagy
 
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