ARGH.
vaping can be so frustrating honestly. I was like "Imma just gonna rewick these real quick, bathe, relax, and then go do yoga. Well.
My siren V2 I was like, this wicking is perfect I have done a LOVELY job. So I assemble, fill confidently, and it starts leaking like a sieve. so I disassemble it and the top cap comes off and I am like ARGH, so then I take things to wash them (again) because everything is ALL sticky and I am like, "Ooh, clearly the problem is the top O ring it is loose. So I replace it. THEN I am like "No this wicking is PERFECT I'm just gonna fill it halfway. So, I do that, and it starts leaking like a sieve again. This is my new "tea"
juice and I don't want to waste it, and finally I get my siren top upside down.
Then, I notice like, the BOTTOM O ring is just MISSING. Oh, I feel bright at that moment, let me tell you. Really clever.
So I go get one of them, but now I trust nothing, and decide to rewick it anyway. If anything, it was probably a worse wicking job than the first one, but I "felt better." Well, that's a lie I felt kinda sick and gross and wanted to bathe. But anyway, so now its fine.
The other wicking job was uneventful, really, and my new Pink Champagne juice with the smidge of Marsala wine is just DELICIOUS. It is going to improve, but it's really, really nice. I see lots of Marsala wine ideas in my future.
But, I was studiously avoiding the clock and so then I bathed and got out and I was like "it's too late for yoga."
But then I was like, "head injury, minor but still it's probably fine you did all that cleaning," and just sat down here. There will be other yoga days,
I'd like to be drugged happy, but valium doesn't do it for me. It's too freaking SEDATING there is no euphoria whatsoever. I just want to get through this last increase and like, move on with my life, feeling normal and on ONE drug that can control my tremor some. I really hate it actually. I'd rather swallow almost ANY other benzo. Don't get me wrong, I am imagining the discontinuation syndrome would be awful. But it's something I am planning to take on a routine basis as while INCREASES make me insane, homeostasis brings harmony.
Like really, I can swallow handfuls of most benzos and be all "La la la" happy and goofy but valium's not like that for me. No idea why, don't much care.
I also don't much care what I die OF at the moment. I'm not at my best, I'm like "Dear God if it is your will, go for it. I'm pretty useless and I probably wouldn't even notice that much.
I need my pack of humans. Sigh.
Anan