Meh. I'm not that picky. Holla dear mixologists. I like made it ALL the way to today and it was HARD and like, I woke up sooooo tired. I'm trying to switch thyroid meds and it always leads to messiness. I have to get through it though. Like, really. These pills are what I can get, so I gotta make them work. I am now supplementing with Iron (thank you, cancer thyroid doc, for depleting my stores of iron by making me into the Red Sea every two weeks, that was fun.) I really want IDK, to feel better? So I am home sick today. And I know it's real because like I would clean up around here normally and I have done exactly almost nothing. The husband says he did not marry me for my housekeeping skills.
He has been in Tucson all week, all excited about all the CRAP that is going to be DONE to our HOUSE to REBUILD it and like, he thinks he is going to be the General Contractor in charge, or whatever.
We are 6 weeks into the flood. The company that was (resentfully) sent to our house again by State Farm to FINISH wants to move on to neater pastures but they can't because they were contracted. They have about a month's worth of work to go, but they were not even THERE yesterday. The husband being the GC brings PROBLEMS. He has finally figured out that demolition and repair buckets are separate (I told him a JILLION times, and did he listen? No.) and like, he was asking three companies for quotes and talking about the MEDIAN.
I was like, "Dude, now I'm not going to have another husband for at least a year. FANTASTIC." I was also, "WHERE in the HELL in our paperwork does it say we need to give State Farm a "median" of quotes? We DON'T. We can give them ONE quote, the most expensive one, and I expect it to come in at 35 cents less than our INSURED MAXIMUM do you hear? There is nothing tying us to that particular contractor and if I were you, I would hire someone who will finish the demo at THEIR prices (which SF has to pay, as they are so behind) and has NO ties to insurance companies at ALL." He has a couple not affiliated with SF but do "insurance work." And I was like, "THINK grasshopper. Okay, maybe they GET IT and they are singing to your tune NOW, but like, the SECOND "their" insurance company tells them to HOP TO IT, they will abandon you, just like we are being abandoned by our demo people because we told them to do it correctly. HIRE a NON-AFFILIATED contractor and put a LATENESS clause in the work, dude. I am SERIOUS I am so DONE with this."
I really should be the one down there, dealing with this, although it's possible NO ONE would be hired by me, but for the love of god, Holy Crud I SWEAR he also hired a homeless person to come help him shove stuff in our yard in the dumpster which is NICE yeah, but not exactly NECESSARY in fact the dumpster should have been gone after FOUR DAYS. He is talking about a "loan" of some random sort to make things go faster since the mortgage co has to come and inspect and crud although in this instance I am not entirely sure they CARE I mean, there's like 65 K left on the mortgage. I also would not hire a homeless guy to come pick up the garbage I could pick up myself. Gah.
This is never gonna end. I'm starting to feel a bit mildly normal. I think I need to swap this thyroid stuff 1:1 not, like, tapering but I don't know,. I was all freaky cold and hoarse yesterday (hypo symptoms) and I would KIILL for a functional medicine doctor right now (I still don't believe in them) but in all seriousness, to just come to my HOUSE and do my labwork and like test my adreanal function which like, I barely get how it WORKS dude let alone how I am supposed to figure it out at LEAST connected to like, your adrenal gland let alone with lithium on board. My adrenals could be "stressed" say the natural thyroid people. They also say your iron could be low, and that's bad (mine is) and also, B-12 and Folate which Oh My I have been supplementing with ANYWAY because like, I have been fatigued.
Adrenal gland equals stress or something like you are too stressed out. I kind of feel like I have been stressed out all of my life, though, (my very first memory is of comforting my mom because she told me my dad was all dying and like, HIS mom was being evil at her. Like the good little social worker I was, I was like, "Mom do you think maybe people say mean things just because they are UPSET?" I don't even recollect any EMOTIONS from that, other than like feeling bad for my MOM and climbing in bed with her... Dude, that lady DID owe me many amends for hitting me, LOL) But, that's the thing. It's probably like I don't even HAVE an adrenal gland anymore. Although I do renmember a time when I could bike to Mt. Vernon and back from my house and consider it great fun, when in fact I would consider that rather unconfortable today.
I deserve more energy but I think I also need more SLEEP. That and for the abx to continue working, bladder infections are the WORST,. Gah. I wonder what the husband will think of my housekeeping NOW. Heh. He will show his true love or not.
Dude. So tired. it's bound to improve, I remember a time, somewhere in the distant past where I felt pretty good. Or, whatever.
I seriously am in the mood to smoke dope, honestly. I am rarely in that mood, mainly because I get so freakishly airheaded, even I can't stand myself,. Yep. Really best for pain management or when you are a teenager.
I did yogo at 5 am ONCE this week. I should SO just do it at night, and tell the husband (who is barely here anyway) to go pound sand and at least sleep until SIX I mean....
I did call out on time there is that. I am feeling an urge to build my beautiful dicodes with my beautiful rose but iDK.
I stepped on my glasses yesterday, man. That was the high moment of my work. Oh, I had my mediation and I can't remember if I said it sucked. If not, it sucked,. I came away with the takeaway: "Just talk to her quietly in a monotone and if you like , need something wait for the doc." I mean, some people are SO unpleasant you just gotta be what THEY need, instead of yourself. . It's not worth it. I would elbow her in the face, but I can't just right now. Too soon. An accidental elbowing that soon would never fly.
Gah,. I'd say oh, well, weekend! But I have notes to do PLUS I have to go to Sierra Vista to get my eyes checked and a new script I am out of contacts.
I wish they could fix my eyes. I mean ,probably with laser surgery but eh. Maybe they can make my astigmatic eye my reading eye and my better eye my far off eye. I have heard you can do that,. IDK.
Anna
Got to get up for ricolas. Ugh