Red Sky Mods

[AlmightyGod]

Once upon a time there was a famous sea captain.
This captain was very successful at what he did.
Never did stormy seas or pirates get the best of him.
He was admired by his crew and fellow captains.

However, there was one thing different about this captain.
Every morning he went through a strange ritual.
He would lock himself in his captain's quarters and open a small safe.
In the safe was an envelope with a piece of paper inside.
He would stare at the paper for a minute, then lock it back up.
After, he would go about his daily duties.

For years this went on, and his crew became very curious.
Was it a treasure map? Was it a letter from a long lost love?
Everyone speculated about the contents of the strange envelope.

One day, the captain died at sea.
After laying the captain's body to rest, the first mate led the entire crew into the captains quarters.
He opened the safe, got the envelope, opened it and ...

The first mate turned pale and showed the paper to the others.





"Port Left, Starboard Right"

 

[violetvoo]

Thats a good one BA

 

[AlmightyGod]

An old sea captain was sitting on a bench, when a young man walked up and sat down.
The youngster had spiked hair & each spike was a different color...green, red, orange, blue, etc.
After a while the young man noticed that the captain was staring at him.

"What's the matter old timer, never done anything wild in your life?

The old captain replied,
"Got drunk once and married a parrot. I was just wondering if you were my son!

 

[skydragon]

Once upon a time there was a famous sea captain.
This captain was very successful at what he did.
Never did stormy seas or pirates get the best of him.
He was admired by his crew and fellow captains.

However, there was one thing different about this captain.
Every morning he went through a strange ritual.
He would lock himself in his captain's quarters and open a small safe.
In the safe was an envelope with a piece of paper inside.
He would stare at the paper for a minute, then lock it back up.
After, he would go about his daily duties.

For years this went on, and his crew became very curious.
Was it a treasure map? Was it a letter from a long lost love?
Everyone speculated about the contents of the strange envelope.

One day, the captain died at sea.
After laying the captain's body to rest, the first mate led the entire crew into the captains quarters.
He opened the safe, got the envelope, opened it and ...

The first mate turned pale and showed the paper to the others.





"Port Left, Starboard Right"

Oh AG, ..................

 

[AlmightyGod]

It was a dark, stormy, night. The Sailor was on his first assignment, and it was guard duty. A Captain stepped out taking his dog for a walk. The nervous young Seaman snapped to attention, made a perfect salute, and snapped out ," Good Evening, Sir!"

The Captain, out for some relaxation, returned the salute and said "Good evening Seaman, nice night, isn't it?" Well it wasn't a nice night, but the Sailor wasn't going to disagree with the Captain, so the he saluted again and replied "Yes Sir!".

The Captain continued, "You know there's something about a stormy night that I find soothing, it's really relaxing. Don't you agree?" The Seaman didn't agree, but then the seaman was just a seaman, and responded " Yes Sir!"

Then the Captain, pointing at the dog said, "This is a Golden Retriever, the best type of dog to train." The Seaman glanced at the dog, saluted yet again and said " Yes Sir!" The Captain continued "I got this dog for my wife." The Seaman simply said, "Good trade Sir!"

 

[violetvoo]

Lmao...@ that one BA

 

[tybin]

i'd save a fortune in littler if mine would just do this!

That is WAAAAY too funny... View attachment 40742 LMAO!!!

I had a friend who's bird was trained to go back to his little jungle gym platform to poop, but that takes the prize!!!

And we all know that cat's are naturals at it...

 

[skydragon]

i'd save a fortune in littler if mine would just do this!

Us too!!!!!!!!!!!!! .... (sorry for the pun) I'm not sure I would trust one of our cats not to leave a deposit on the seat. And it wouldn't be pretty.

 

[ISBN]

Squonk Hole​

-- For spacekitty​

Not to quote myself but...

Squonk Hole​

...I'm just sayin'

 

[SKYYcamel]

Should be getting my Mark-III tomorrow!

 

[ISBN]

Us too!!!!!!!!!!!!! .... (sorry for the pun) I'm not sure I would trust one of our cats not to leave a deposit on the seat. And it wouldn't be pretty.

...And they never put the seat down.

LOL

 

[Drottwiler]

Super I know you'll like it..

 

[tybin]

oh my

Us too!!!!!!!!!!!!! .... (sorry for the pun) I'm not sure I would trust one of our cats not to leave a deposit on the seat. And it wouldn't be pretty.

 

[Reddhott]

loved the jokes! i had a cat that would jump in the tub while u were takiin a bath!

 

[emsmom]

Ok experts, I need some feedback here. Is the 18650 or vv model worth dealing with the larger size to get the longer batt times, or for little female hands, is it better to stick with the smaller model?

 

[spacekitty]

Not to quote myself but...

Squonk Hole​

...I'm just sayin'

But I don't think they live in holes... LOL!!


THE SQUONK.
(Lacrimacorpus dissolvens.)

The range of the squonk is very limited. Few people outside of Pennsylvania have ever heard of the quaint beast, which is said to be fairly common in the hemlock forests of that State. The squonk is of a very retiring disposition, generally traveling about at twilight and dusk. Because of its misfitting skin, which is covered with warts and moles, it is always unhappy ; in fact it is said, by people who are best able to judge, to be the most morbid of beast. Hunters who are good at tracking are able to follow a squonk by its tear-stained trail, for the animal weeps constantly. When cornered and escape seems impossible, or when surprised and frightened, it may even dissolve itself in tears. Squonk hunters are most successful on frosty moonlight nights, when tears are shed slowly and the animal dislikes moving about ; it may then be heard weeping under the boughs of dark hemlock trees. Mr. J. P. Wentling, formerly of Pennsylvania, but now at St. Anthony Park, Minnesota, had a disappointing experience with a squonk near Mont Alto. He made a clever capture by mimicking the squonk and inducing it to hop into a sack, in which he was carrying it home, when suddenly the burden lightened and the weeping ceased. Wentling unslung the sack and looked in. There was nothing but tears and bubbles.

Page Thirty-One.

Fearsome Creatures of the Lumberwoods, With a Few Desert and Mountain Beasts
Written by William T. Cox • Illustrated by Coert Du Bois • With Latin Classifications by George B. Sudworth
(Washington: Judd & Detweiler, Inc., 1910) Original Text and Illustrations Public Domain License.

 

[thehangdude]

It's mate, the Squonkette lives in the corner of a wooded hole. Be careful handling the Squonkette, as it has been known to spit juice.

 

[violetvoo]

Should be getting my Mark-III tomorrow!

Congrats Skyy!

Ok experts, I need some feedback here. Is the 18650 or vv model worth dealing with the larger size to get the longer batt times, or for little female hands, is it better to stick with the smaller model?

imho the vv or 18650 is way to go!

 

[ISBN]

What does a Dyslexic Pirate Say?




RRAAAAAAAAAAA!

 

[skydragon]

But I don't think they live in holes... LOL!!


THE SQUONK.
(Lacrimacorpus dissolvens.)

The range of the squonk is very limited. Few people outside of Pennsylvania have ever heard of the quaint beast, which is said to be fairly common in the hemlock forests of that State. The squonk is of a very retiring disposition, generally traveling about at twilight and dusk. Because of its misfitting skin, which is covered with warts and moles, it is always unhappy ; in fact it is said, by people who are best able to judge, to be the most morbid of beast. Hunters who are good at tracking are able to follow a squonk by its tear-stained trail, for the animal weeps constantly. When cornered and escape seems impossible, or when surprised and frightened, it may even dissolve itself in tears. Squonk hunters are most successful on frosty moonlight nights, when tears are shed slowly and the animal dislikes moving about ; it may then be heard weeping under the boughs of dark hemlock trees. Mr. J. P. Wentling, formerly of Pennsylvania, but now at St. Anthony Park, Minnesota, had a disappointing experience with a squonk near Mont Alto. He made a clever capture by mimicking the squonk and inducing it to hop into a sack, in which he was carrying it home, when suddenly the burden lightened and the weeping ceased. Wentling unslung the sack and looked in. There was nothing but tears and bubbles.

Page Thirty-One.

Fearsome Creatures of the Lumberwoods, With a Few Desert and Mountain Beasts
Written by William T. Cox • Illustrated by Coert Du Bois • With Latin Classifications by George B. Sudworth
(Washington: Judd & Detweiler, Inc., 1910) Original Text and Illustrations Public Domain License.

Now you have me feeling sorry for the poor squonk.