Hi I’m (FAMOUS PERSONALITY) and I’m a VAPER. I quit a X year smoking habit in (X timeframe) thanks to ecigs.
Now you may hate me already because of this but that’s OK. A lot of people are hating on me now.
The tobacco companies hate me…
{Tons of cigarettes rain down}
Because I’m no longer spending hundreds of dollars on their product. Heck they even stopped sending me my annual birthday card with coupons for more cigarettes…..or maybe they just think I finally died.
The pharmaceutical companies don’t like me….
(Enters scene completely covered head to toe in nicotine patches and chewing nicotine gum}
Because I’m not spending money on their products which (dirty little secret) are only 10% effective in general (and wer 0 % effective for me)…..but I can blow a wicked bubble.
(Blows enormous chewing gum bubbles that pop fades to next scene)
Politicians don’t like me cause after telling me the reason they were raising taxes on cigarettes so high---up to $10.00 a pack or more--was to keep me from smoking cigarettes
I’m finally listening and not buying them anymore.
(Stops walking suddenly)
I'm not sure why they don't like me
{As a hurricane of dollar bills rain down realizes, sarcastically.) Oh, yeah.
{Walks through room with Super Bowl party going on.
With this many people losing money is it surprising they say things to scare people: like ecigs have antifreeze in them (It’s actually a additive found in many of the things you’re probably eating right now)
(Points out Super Bowl party spread with PG containing foods and products)
(While walking outside…
So if you don’t like me, that’s OK. I like me. I sure don’t miss the TAR & carcinogens found in tobacco cigarettes because, as we all know, that’s the stuff that kills you. I’ve even been cutting down my nicotine and can breath a lot better.
Which kinda sucks, cause I now have extra energy to finally do some home improvement projects I’ve been wanting to do.
So you'll probably hear that ecigs aren’t safe but what actually is? (Stops and gently tells his obviously sick child: “I told you not to eat all 10 lbs of that brocholli.”)
If you want to learn for yourself or a loved one, the real story about how ecigs are a SAFER ALTERNATIVE to smoking go to CASAA.org.
(Grabs a chain saw and begins climbing a ladder perched on a tree.)
Now grab your favorite caffeinated or flavored alcoholic beverage and enjoy the rest of the game!
(Camera pulls back to reveal examples of everyday, so-called “safe” products being used throughout the neighborhood, kids running and falling down, etc)
Now you may hate me already because of this but that’s OK. A lot of people are hating on me now.
The tobacco companies hate me…
{Tons of cigarettes rain down}
Because I’m no longer spending hundreds of dollars on their product. Heck they even stopped sending me my annual birthday card with coupons for more cigarettes…..or maybe they just think I finally died.
The pharmaceutical companies don’t like me….
(Enters scene completely covered head to toe in nicotine patches and chewing nicotine gum}
Because I’m not spending money on their products which (dirty little secret) are only 10% effective in general (and wer 0 % effective for me)…..but I can blow a wicked bubble.
(Blows enormous chewing gum bubbles that pop fades to next scene)
Politicians don’t like me cause after telling me the reason they were raising taxes on cigarettes so high---up to $10.00 a pack or more--was to keep me from smoking cigarettes
I’m finally listening and not buying them anymore.
(Stops walking suddenly)
I'm not sure why they don't like me
{As a hurricane of dollar bills rain down realizes, sarcastically.) Oh, yeah.
{Walks through room with Super Bowl party going on.
With this many people losing money is it surprising they say things to scare people: like ecigs have antifreeze in them (It’s actually a additive found in many of the things you’re probably eating right now)
(Points out Super Bowl party spread with PG containing foods and products)
(While walking outside…
So if you don’t like me, that’s OK. I like me. I sure don’t miss the TAR & carcinogens found in tobacco cigarettes because, as we all know, that’s the stuff that kills you. I’ve even been cutting down my nicotine and can breath a lot better.
Which kinda sucks, cause I now have extra energy to finally do some home improvement projects I’ve been wanting to do.
So you'll probably hear that ecigs aren’t safe but what actually is? (Stops and gently tells his obviously sick child: “I told you not to eat all 10 lbs of that brocholli.”)
If you want to learn for yourself or a loved one, the real story about how ecigs are a SAFER ALTERNATIVE to smoking go to CASAA.org.
(Grabs a chain saw and begins climbing a ladder perched on a tree.)
Now grab your favorite caffeinated or flavored alcoholic beverage and enjoy the rest of the game!
(Camera pulls back to reveal examples of everyday, so-called “safe” products being used throughout the neighborhood, kids running and falling down, etc)
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