Today's Laugh

[MrsIken]

Being a ex mason by trade I always laugh at this story, ya its been around for a long time but it still just cracks me up, the streaming visual.
A Bricklayer’s Accident Report : Hilarious | Everyday Life Screw-Ups at Daily Screw-Ups by Lorrette Young

wow aspen! that's a crazy story! definitely made me laugh though!

 

[Thyestean]

@ the walmart one

 

[MrsIken]

A friend is a present you give yourself. By Robert Louis Stevenson

 

[Thyestean]

A friend is a present headache you give yourself. By Robert Louis Stevenson

__________

 

[HzG8rGrl]

I so needed these after a bad day. Thanks neighbors!!!!!

 

[Tiger]

These all were really funny, thanks for the laugh.

 

[notsoogood]

__________

Hopefully we are some of your headaches!

 

[AJMoore]

Being a ex mason by trade I always laugh at this story, ya its been around for a long time but it still just cracks me up, the streaming visual.
A Bricklayer’s Accident Report : Hilarious | Everyday Life Screw-Ups at Daily Screw-Ups by Lorrette Young

OK, here it is, Sunday nite post super bowl, lying in bed and reading this. Good Lord, I couldn't stop laughing. My cat is now looking at me strangly, wondering "whats up?"

 

[Thyestean]

Hopefully we are some of your headaches!

lol ....

 

[MrsIken]

I can't stay long b/c I have to get to work, but I just wanted to say that I'm glad that everyone is getting some good laughs over here!! Keep the jokes and funny stories coming!

 

[MrsIken]

Thy....

You are too much! I'm glad that you are one of those headaches

i mean presents

yeah, that's what i meant... presents

HAVE A GREAT DAY EVERYONE!!

 

[Thyestean]

 

[Iken]

Buddy Christ!! LOL Love it!


The Black Sheep
A professor is sent to darkest Africa to live with a primitive tribe. He spends years with them, teaching them reading, writing, math and science.

One day the wife of the tribe's chief gives birth to a white child. The tribe is shocked, and the chief pulls the professor aside and says, "Look here! You're the only white man we've ever seen and this woman gives birth to a white child. It doesn't take a genius to figure out what happened!"

The professor replied, "No, Chief. You're mistaken. What you have here is a natural occurrence, what we in the civilized world call an albino! Look at that field over there. All of the sheep are white except for one black one. Nature does this on occasion."

The chief was silent for a moment, then said, "Tell you what. You don't say anything more about that sheep and I won't say anything more about that white child."

 

[Thyestean]

LOL ... good one

 

[HzG8rGrl]

Love it-Don't ask-Don't tell!!!!!

 

[Iken]

I just Love this thread Tina! You Rock!


Two men were walking their dogs together. The first guy with a Chocolate lab and the second a Chihuahua

The first guy says, "Hey, you want to get something to eat?"

The second guy replies, "Yeah, but they all have signs that say 'No Dogs Allowed'."

The first guy with the lab puts sunglasses on and hands the other guy a pair. "Follow my lead," he says.

As he walks into the restaurant a waiter stops him and says, "Sir, no dogs allowed."

The man replies, "It's O.K., this is my seeing eye dog." The waiter apologizes and leads the man to a table as the second man enters.

The same waiter stops him but the guy says, "This is my seeing eye dog. I'm with the other guy."

The waiter replies, "Sir, you can't fool me, you have a Chihuahua."

The man freaks out and says, "A Chihuahua? They gave me a freakin Chihuahua?!"

 

[HzG8rGrl]

Thanks-I love to check for a needed laugh. Here ya go.....




Hung Chow calls in to work and says, "Hey, boss I not come work today, I really sick. I got headache, stomachache and my legs hurt. I not come work."

The boss says, "You know Hung Chow, I really need you today. When I feel like this I go to my wife and tell her to give me sex. That makes everything better and I can go to work. You should try that."

Two hours later Hung Chow calls again: "Boss, I do what you say and I feel great. I be at work soon. You got nice house."

 

[MrsIken]

Thanks-I love to check for a needed laugh. Here ya go.....




Hung Chow calls in to work and says, "Hey, boss I not come work today, I really sick. I got headache, stomachache and my legs hurt. I not come work."

The boss says, "You know Hung Chow, I really need you today. When I feel like this I go to my wife and tell her to give me sex. That makes everything better and I can go to work. You should try that."

Two hours later Hung Chow calls again: "Boss, I do what you say and I feel great. I be at work soon. You got nice house."

that was hilarious tina!!!

 

[MrsIken]

I just Love this thread Tina! You Rock!


Two men were walking their dogs together. The first guy with a Chocolate lab and the second a Chihuahua

The first guy says, "Hey, you want to get something to eat?"

The second guy replies, "Yeah, but they all have signs that say 'No Dogs Allowed'."

The first guy with the lab puts sunglasses on and hands the other guy a pair. "Follow my lead," he says.

As he walks into the restaurant a waiter stops him and says, "Sir, no dogs allowed."

The man replies, "It's O.K., this is my seeing eye dog." The waiter apologizes and leads the man to a table as the second man enters.

The same waiter stops him but the guy says, "This is my seeing eye dog. I'm with the other guy."

The waiter replies, "Sir, you can't fool me, you have a Chihuahua."

The man freaks out and says, "A Chihuahua? They gave me a freakin Chihuahua?!"

you're right hunny... this is a great thread!!! that was freaking funny!! i could picture him screaming about how he was a chihuahua! hahahah

 

[Electricnut]

HOW TO INSTALL A SOUTHERN HOME SECURITY SYSTEM
1. Go to a secondhand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots.
2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo Magazine.
3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.
4. Splash a little watered down rusty red paint on the sidewalk.
5. Leave a note on your door that reads
"Bubba,
Bertha, Duke, Slim, & I went for more ammo and beer. Be back in an hour.
Don't mess with the pit bulls; they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up bad.
I don't think Killer took part, but it was hard to tell from all the blood.
Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house.
Better wait outside. Be right back.
Cooter"