Unsupportive Spouse

[raspberryblu]

I'm into the fruity flavors mostly. We did the sniff test on the bottles and he identified the two he finds offensive. One of the two is one of two of my absolute favorites, the other I vape only sporadically. I agreed not to vape these when he's in close proximity.

I've not suggested, encouraged, asked or cajoled him into converting to vaping. I refuse to be a self righteous ex-smoker; I find it highly annoying.......

 

[AmandaD]

Glad you're working it out!

 

[WillyZee]

ask him if he can still smell the vape all the way from the couch ... if yes, tell him ... you'll keep the bedroom door closed for him.

 

[Elizabeth Baldwin]

It's really a shame that there are so many couples that can't do this together. Vaping was a great bonding experience for my girlfriend and I. I started vaping on February 9th, and on February 14, she got her first eGo kit. She asked me, "What's this?" I said, "Because I want us both to live a long and healthy life together." You would've thought I'd just given her a diamond tiara to see the look on her face.

I told her she didn't have to keep vaping if she decided she didn't like it, but I had no intentions of going back to cigarettes. We're both still vaping today, and we're both noticeably healthier for it! Perhaps you could try an approach like this with your husband?

I totally agree with you. I started vaping and my husband followed 2 days later. We've turned it into a hobby we enjoy together. It actually helps bring a couple together by a common interest.

I think people "pretend" it bothers them simply because they don't understand or feel weird about it. I agree with the previous poster that some even feel threatened. It's like people who force a cough when they see someone smoking even though they are 50 feet away and outdoors. It's a psychological thing. My husband Vapes peach tobacco all the time, I despise the smell of peaches but I can't smell the odor from his vape at all. Yet my smelling has improved tremendously. I doubt the odor could be that obnoxious. The only time I really smell peaches is when he's filling/cleaning/changing cotton. Then its brief. I think the vapor dissipates fairly quick and seriously doubt it would be that harsh to anyone. That's just my opinion.

If I were you I'd just keep on vaping. If he doesn't like it, I'd just do it in the kitchen or bedroom...or wherever he isn't. I wouldn't cause a stir over it. But...of course...he smokes so there's not much complaining he could do that's actually justified. I'm a strong believer in good, open communication in a relationship. I would sit him down and just talk nicely about it to him. I'd explain that's it is important to me and ask that he be more understanding. Then I'd nicely point out that smoking stinks...joking.

 

[CalamityJess]

I'm into the fruity flavors mostly. We did the sniff test on the bottles and he identified the two he finds offensive. One of the two is one of two of my absolute favorites, the other I vape only sporadically. I agreed not to vape these when he's in close proximity.

I've not suggested, encouraged, asked or cajoled him into converting to vaping. I refuse to be a self righteous ex-smoker; I find it highly annoying.......

I didn't figure you were. Of course that doesn't stop the (and my) other half from worrying that you will. though I have admittedly tried bribing...I mean aesthetically tempting mine with a couple setups and customizations. I may or may not have ordered him a phiniac sandblasted tank for our anniversary....

 

[Eivind211]

My wife is very supportive of my new hobby, until she gets the bank statement. Then it's "you spent how much?!?" All kidding aside, she's never been a smoker, but has an iclear 16 with some chai tea 0nic juice sitting with my vape gear and takes a few puffs on it every once in a while. She, like my kids really like the fact that I no longer have to take time away to go outside or stop the car on long rides to smoke. I think my kids are even more supportive that daddy is no longer smoking, they still call it smoke, but understand that it'd not really smoke.

Second hand smoke is just as bad if not worse than smoking yourself, so if he's still smoking inside, you're still smoking too in a way. It would be best if he went outside to smoke, if he asks you to go outside as well, that wouldn't be an unreasonable request. More than likely as suggested earlier in this thread, he's missing you smoking with him.

 

[montara]

Tell him to grow up and grow a pair... After 2 years of vaping I see so many around me adopting the "modern nicotine delivery system" that when I see someone that actually lights up I cant help but feel sorry for them. You go girl, he should be very grateful to have a wife that "get's it".

 

[Kellysleep]

My hubby and I both switched together maybe he thinks that you will start nagging him to switch and to get head of you he put up a preemptive strike putting what your doing down so you won't try to get him to do it. I highly doubt he is smelling your vape over his smoke unless he is sitting on top of you. I know I can't smell my husbands and he can't smell mine and we are 12 ft or less apart. Good luck let him know your not trying to change him just yourself!

 

[JaxMike]

I'm into the fruity flavors mostly. We did the sniff test on the bottles and he identified the two he finds offensive. One of the two is one of two of my absolute favorites, the other I vape only sporadically. I agreed not to vape these when he's in close proximity.

I've not suggested, encouraged, asked or cajoled him into converting to vaping. I refuse to be a self righteous ex-smoker; I find it highly annoying.......

Sounds good. I know that there are some flavors that just kill my wife... I can walk in the door after vaping them in the car, and she starts complaining. Other flavors seem not to cause much trouble.

But, she wants to work with me on it, so none of it is really that big a deal. I don't want to cause her discomfort, so I'm trying to find a happy medium. Hope your husband will at least try to meet you halfway, or somewhere along the line.

 

[raspberryblu]

Sounds good. I know that there are some flavors that just kill my wife... I can walk in the door after vaping them in the car, and she starts complaining. Other flavors seem not to cause much trouble.

But, she wants to work with me on it, so none of it is really that big a deal. I don't want to cause her discomfort, so I'm trying to find a happy medium. Hope your husband will at least try to meet you halfway, or somewhere along the line.

I think he's feeling a level of discomfort so I'm trying to help him ease into it. I would think there would be more validity to his complaints if he were a non-smoker. Sorry, I'm not buying that raspberries smell worse than analog smoke. Anyway, I'm trying to meet him half way.

Have not been to Blackhat. I live in the Burg and loving the fact that a vape shop opened right around the corner from me....

 

[JaxMike]

I think he's feeling a level of discomfort so I'm trying to help him ease into it. I would think there would be more validity to his complaints if he were a non-smoker. Sorry, I'm not buying that raspberries smell worse than analog smoke. Anyway, I'm trying to meet him half way.

Have not been to Blackhat. I live in the Burg and loving the fact that a vape shop opened right around the corner from me....

Well, to some (including me, to some extent) the fruity flavors can be really sick-sweet. I'm not defending your husband -- sounds like he needs a little attitude adjustment but you have that under control, I think -- but experience through low these three months has taught me that some of the odors, especially the sweet ones, really do bother some people.

 

[zanedog]

Hide his cigarettes and tell him he's a vapor now.

 

[svg1234]

When a couple share an activity and behaviour - especially an addiction - it is very comforting and pleasing for them. When one partner suddenly changes his or her behaviour - it throws the other partner off. It's like a dance the two of you have become very accustomed to...and now you've gone and changed your steps! It's not that he's worried you'll nag him. It's that it puts the spotlight on HIS smoking habit (which he also knows is bad for him). Guilt, a sense of being betrayed, envy, and fear. Plenty of emotions and thoughts have come into play whether he expresses them or not. You've gone ahead and done something good for yourself. Bravo. While it's an unfortunate reaction on his part - it is common and completely understandable. However, being abusive or disparaging (calling it "stupid", the vape "stinks") should not be accepted. That's where the line must be drawn. Believe me, he knows that HE is the one being stupid. Otherwise, you wouldn't have gotten such a strong reaction. You've forced him to see something he would greatly prefer to ignore.

According to your signature, you just started vaping a whopping 10 days ago. Give it time! But don't cave. There's a big difference between compromise / working it out (which a poster wrote about earlier in the thread - nice to see a "voice of reason") and not standing up for yourself. You are entitled to do what is good for your health.

Last, I would advise you to NEVER say a word about him quitting smoking or vaping. You've already written that you have no intention of doing so. Good. It's not about the nagging. It's that if you want to help him quit, it's the best approach. Stay the course and you might be be surprised that one day he will give vaping a try. He has to feel that it was his own choice.

Good luck.

 

[Ben Button Arndt]

I love the smell of fruity juices. I've even gotten compliments from non smokers on how good the flavor smells

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I337 using Tapatalk

 

[pjmarkert]

Wife complains about the smell too, told her quit smoking and I may quit vaping!

 

[HighEnd]

Wow... Now I've heard it all. Lol.

 

[invisible]

Some people are actually allergic to some of the properties within an e-cig. They should check for allergic reactions to PG and VG. Although it's more common to be allergic to PG. I think for some people, the thought of transitioning is repulsive because it's like going from a manual to an automatic, not going to lie, I never will drive an automatic. Too complicated and stuff. Just kidding. Change is hard.

 

[951vappin]

Let him know that there are no health hazzards and it's saving your life.

 

[AmandaD]

Some people are actually allergic to some of the properties within an e-cig. They should check for allergic reactions to PG and VG. Although it's more common to be allergic to PG. I think for some people, the thought of transitioning is repulsive because it's like going from a manual to an automatic, not going to lie, I never will drive an automatic. Too complicated and stuff. Just kidding. Change is hard.

But as it's in asthma inhalers and hospital a/c systems, it's unlikely people are actually allergic to the vapor

 

[zanedog]

But as it's in asthma inhalers and hospital a/c systems, it's unlikely people are actually allergic to the vapor

It has not been in hospital a/c systems for many years. It has been replaced by millipore filtration.