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Explain to her in that case she is not allowed to use the stove as it makes water vapor.
"Don't do that in the house!"
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Explain to her in that case she is not allowed to use the stove as it makes water vapor.
If you're really intending on quitting nic all together go vape outside... make it as hard on yourself as possible, but all in the name of quitting, because it's going to be insanely hard to do so if you don't use every trick possible. I like smoking (or rather vaping now) and I like the effects of the nic. I'll vape some nic free here and there, but since I'm not trying to quit I don't keep the habits that make it harder for myself to consume like I did with analogs.
i'm really shocked by the reactions people are having to vaping in their homes. i went to stay with my besty a few weeks ago, for 4 days, and vaped in her apt & car the whole time (she's a non-smoker)... she could smell the vapor (damn those life-long non-smokers and their superior noses) but she said it was pleasant to smell, like a scented candle, and that the scents didn't linger at all. she found it really amusing, actually, seeing these huge clouds of "smoke" while i worked, sitting on her bed (i freelance, so was finishing up some stuff at her place).
suzamme, i'm sorry about your partner being so difficult. i mean... geez. i think there are certain people who just can't get past the visual aspect of vaping. have you tried comparing it to say, nicotine gum? i mean, she'd let you chew nicotine gum in the house, wouldn't she? ffs.
suzamme, i'm sorry about your partner being so difficult. i mean... geez. i think there are certain people who just can't get past the visual aspect of vaping. have you tried comparing it to say, nicotine gum? i mean, she'd let you chew nicotine gum in the house, wouldn't she? ffs.
I'm very fortunate that my wife has been VERY supportive. She likes the smell when she smells it and its rarely. She does think the liquid smells like crap. Haven't tried to vape elsewhere except in a bar. I don't want this to be an excuse to "smoke everywhere." 
I just started vaping and my mom (very anti-smoker) is so supportive of my vaping. She doesn't even say a thing when I vape in the house or when we're in the car together. As long as i'm not smoking anymore she (and i) are happy!
I have not yet, however, vaped in any public buildings (yet) with the exception of a sports bar/restaurant. I just don't want to be disrespectful I'm sure i'll get over that though... just feels weird vaping indoors when I know I was never able to smoke in those smoke-free areas.
Anyways, good luck with your partner! I'm sure an informational chat will help, as others said.
I have not yet, however, vaped in any public buildings (yet) with the exception of a sports bar/restaurant. I just don't want to be disrespectful
I'm sure i'll get over that though... just feels weird vaping indoors when I know I was never able to smoke in those smoke-free areas.Anyways, good luck with your partner! I'm sure an informational chat will help, as others said.
My boyfriend is a non-smoker. He's always hoped I would quit but never ranted at me over it, since that's guaranteed to not only make me smoke more but also feel contemptuous and chilly towards him, to boot. I used to go outside a lot and of course never smoked in his truck or house.
Since I've started vaping he's really happy. He doesn't care where I vape.
Your wife's attitude hints at righteousness, a quality I personally cannot abide. Particularly once she knows all the facts about vaping but continues on the warpath nonetheless.
If my boyfriend started up with me in a similar manner I would show him the door. It's really a much larger issue than being just about smoking. Since I passed the age of 18 I no longer consider that as an adult I need someone's "permission." Nor do you.
Vape on. Don't apologize.
Since I've started vaping he's really happy. He doesn't care where I vape.
Your wife's attitude hints at righteousness, a quality I personally cannot abide. Particularly once she knows all the facts about vaping but continues on the warpath nonetheless.
If my boyfriend started up with me in a similar manner I would show him the door. It's really a much larger issue than being just about smoking. Since I passed the age of 18 I no longer consider that as an adult I need someone's "permission." Nor do you.
Vape on. Don't apologize.
At first, I thought your partner was just a power tripper, but then I started thinking..
Could it be that she is just trying to help you?
If she was a smoker once, she probably identifies nicotine with the bad things of smoking and the difficulty of giving up.
Everyone I talk to about it almost sneers at me saying "yeah, but it still has nicotine in it" and "it's not really quitting". I think most people think nicotine is one of the worst things in cigarettes.
I tell them, "I don't want to give up nicotine, just smoking and I did that. Now I have quit and just have a portable pick-me-up device , that is harmless to others."
Also, one i said the other day was "If science found that a cup of coffee was really bad for you, but caffine was ok, I wouldn't want to give up caffine either.... just the harmfull stuff that is mixed with it."
She may just see herself as being an enabler, encouraging you to keep your habit instead of helping you stop.
Another thought could be that it just annoys her.... I gave up for a few years and I had to constantly fight the urge to smoke... when people smoked around me it annoyed me, not because I didn't like it.... but because I did!
She may still be fighting deep seated urges and doesn't want to be reminded of them all the time, especially in the home.
I would specifically tell her, you have no desire to quit nicotine at this moment... just smoking, so there is no need to actively 'help' me, I would just appreciate your support and understanding.
There is more going on here than just logic.
Could it be that she is just trying to help you?
If she was a smoker once, she probably identifies nicotine with the bad things of smoking and the difficulty of giving up.
Everyone I talk to about it almost sneers at me saying "yeah, but it still has nicotine in it" and "it's not really quitting". I think most people think nicotine is one of the worst things in cigarettes.
I tell them, "I don't want to give up nicotine, just smoking and I did that. Now I have quit and just have a portable pick-me-up device , that is harmless to others."
Also, one i said the other day was "If science found that a cup of coffee was really bad for you, but caffine was ok, I wouldn't want to give up caffine either.... just the harmfull stuff that is mixed with it."
She may just see herself as being an enabler, encouraging you to keep your habit instead of helping you stop.
Another thought could be that it just annoys her.... I gave up for a few years and I had to constantly fight the urge to smoke... when people smoked around me it annoyed me, not because I didn't like it.... but because I did!
She may still be fighting deep seated urges and doesn't want to be reminded of them all the time, especially in the home.
I would specifically tell her, you have no desire to quit nicotine at this moment... just smoking, so there is no need to actively 'help' me, I would just appreciate your support and understanding.
There is more going on here than just logic.
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I often wonder how much of the animosity from former smokers comes from the "cheating" factor. As in, "You haven't really quit smoking like I did. You're cheating."
I have a pet theory about former smokers who are smoking nazis now. I think they didn't really want to quit smoking but caved into the peer pressure. It was probably a long and difficult road for them because they really wanted to be smoking, but they didn't like all the negative attitude from others when they did smoke.
Perhaps now they feel that they can righteously (good word!) dish out the grief they got when they smoked and force others to make the same choice to quit smoking like they thought they had to do? IOW, "if I have to suffer, so do you". Sort of like how some fat person who finally get skinny think they now have a right to start picking on other fat people?
Just a thought.
I have a pet theory about former smokers who are smoking nazis now. I think they didn't really want to quit smoking but caved into the peer pressure. It was probably a long and difficult road for them because they really wanted to be smoking, but they didn't like all the negative attitude from others when they did smoke.
Perhaps now they feel that they can righteously (good word!) dish out the grief they got when they smoked and force others to make the same choice to quit smoking like they thought they had to do? IOW, "if I have to suffer, so do you". Sort of like how some fat person who finally get skinny think they now have a right to start picking on other fat people?
Just a thought.
Thank you to each of you for contributing to this forum topic. I look forward to more stories and wisdom.
Your support, suggestions, and insights have helped me reach a place of personal power and understanding that goes way beyond the spinning I was doing when this issue surprisingly popped up.
I choose to vape in my room and outside and in my car and at my studio (inside and out) etc. and will continue to, no matter who frowns, growls, objects, sneers, or coughs (yes, I have had people actually cough as they walk by because they believed I was smoking an analogue).
I continue to choose to support others in their processes, no matter what I may believe I would do in their place.
We vapers may still be in the minority but we have definitely decided to make healthier choices for ourselves by letting go of the addiction to analogues. Even though it is difficult at times, I am determined to remain visible and vocal about this choice.
Vape On!
Your support, suggestions, and insights have helped me reach a place of personal power and understanding that goes way beyond the spinning I was doing when this issue surprisingly popped up.
I choose to vape in my room and outside and in my car and at my studio (inside and out) etc. and will continue to, no matter who frowns, growls, objects, sneers, or coughs (yes, I have had people actually cough as they walk by because they believed I was smoking an analogue).
I continue to choose to support others in their processes, no matter what I may believe I would do in their place.
We vapers may still be in the minority but we have definitely decided to make healthier choices for ourselves by letting go of the addiction to analogues. Even though it is difficult at times, I am determined to remain visible and vocal about this choice.
Vape On!
Wish I would've read this first. Went to Math Lab today, per usual. I was going to stealth vape there as I have over the past 4 times I've been there since I got my stuff. I've been cautious, or so I thought. I hide the light, and now that I have a Tornado that is even easier, and I don't exhale quickly so the vapor is gone. Anyhow, go to enter Math Lab today and there was a sign "Electronic Cigarettes are prohibited in Math Lab". Damn it! I found it to be really calming too. I'm pretty sure no one else is using an ecig in there, so I probably wasn't as cautious as I thought.
What makes this worse is that because they're aware of it means that other entities on campus may become aware and then ban it campus wide. Of course, I'd still have the bathroom!!
I would still bring it to someones attention before ignorance takes a foothold.
admittedly, I've never been to college so my expertise is lacking. Maybe an anonymous letter to the dean with all the facts of ecigs?
My mother, a long-time smoker who had to quit cold turkey earlier last year due to emphysema, has no problems with me vaping in the house and around her. I think that is enough of a go-ahead. I still ask first to vape in other non-smoking areas.
Glad to hear an update from ya SuZ, and happy to hear things seem to be improving.
I was thinking after the last time I posted that, at least in your head, you could argue that, as you didn't require anyone's permission to START smoking, requiring it to STOP seems rather redundant. Anyway I presume you have or have had a parent in your life and didn't desire another one near your own age lol.
My other half was marginally concerned about vaping but only in that there might be something 'weird' in the juice (think he was thinking illegal, and class A) and the fact I vape a LOT lol. I just cut down a bit when he is around (and go vape crazy when he isn't) but otherwise sort of made it apparent that this wasn't something up for either discussion or negotiation. He hated me smoking but never complained (other than 'one day I hope you can quit cos I dont want to lose you' once in a blue moon)or tried to use pressure as I'd always made it clear that I wasn't about to stop as I didnt want to. I made the concession not to vape like a mad person while he is around (without discussing it mind you I just do it less, but I still vape) because he didn't try and 'make' me to stop smoking analogs.
Compromise is fine, control is not
Contnued success to ya SuZ!
I was thinking after the last time I posted that, at least in your head, you could argue that, as you didn't require anyone's permission to START smoking, requiring it to STOP seems rather redundant. Anyway I presume you have or have had a parent in your life and didn't desire another one near your own age lol.
My other half was marginally concerned about vaping but only in that there might be something 'weird' in the juice (think he was thinking illegal, and class A) and the fact I vape a LOT lol. I just cut down a bit when he is around (and go vape crazy when he isn't) but otherwise sort of made it apparent that this wasn't something up for either discussion or negotiation. He hated me smoking but never complained (other than 'one day I hope you can quit cos I dont want to lose you' once in a blue moon)or tried to use pressure as I'd always made it clear that I wasn't about to stop as I didnt want to. I made the concession not to vape like a mad person while he is around (without discussing it mind you I just do it less, but I still vape) because he didn't try and 'make' me to stop smoking analogs.
Compromise is fine, control is not
Contnued success to ya SuZ!
I spoke to my partner about trying to quit analogs and start on E-Cigs/PV's. I never smoked in our house, I wasn't "allowed" to, which I don't disagree with becuase even I hated walking into a smelly smoke house.
I did explain that I enjoy smoking, which I do, I just found what seems to be a healthier alternative, and hey, maybe even down the road I can just vape for flavor, and not the addition of nicotine. I explained about the lack of lingering smell, the lack of yellow stains..etc. I also threw out that I'm tired of smoking in the cold and it gives me opportunity to smoke in my computer room(Ok so I snuck one in for the team, lol).
When I finally got my first PV(510) I vaped away when I heard her coming I'd stop and let her come in the room and we'd talk, whatever.. Then I'd ask, "Do you smell anything?", and she'd of course say no, so then I took my PT and just puffed some Tobacco flavored juice into the air and she kind of sniffed the air.
In the end we stuck with the original bargain, but I still showed her that it really isn't some nasty smelling stuff. I've vaped with her in the room now while talking and not a bother.
So all in all my experience worked out well for me. I no longer smoke analog's, she doesn't have to kiss a total ashtray anymore, I smell cleaner, I feel a hell of a lot better in the mornings since I don't smoke anymore. I just vape.
I did explain that I enjoy smoking, which I do, I just found what seems to be a healthier alternative, and hey, maybe even down the road I can just vape for flavor, and not the addition of nicotine. I explained about the lack of lingering smell, the lack of yellow stains..etc. I also threw out that I'm tired of smoking in the cold and it gives me opportunity to smoke in my computer room(Ok so I snuck one in for the team, lol).
When I finally got my first PV(510) I vaped away when I heard her coming I'd stop and let her come in the room and we'd talk, whatever.. Then I'd ask, "Do you smell anything?", and she'd of course say no, so then I took my PT and just puffed some Tobacco flavored juice into the air and she kind of sniffed the air.
In the end we stuck with the original bargain, but I still showed her that it really isn't some nasty smelling stuff. I've vaped with her in the room now while talking and not a bother.
So all in all my experience worked out well for me. I no longer smoke analog's, she doesn't have to kiss a total ashtray anymore, I smell cleaner, I feel a hell of a lot better in the mornings since I don't smoke anymore. I just vape.
Compromise is fine, control is not
This should be in the favorite quotes thread also.
GREAT summation of the olde drawing the line in sand.
Thanks!
I vaped while watching the Olympics in the living room for the last 2 nights while she was upstairs...it was semi-stealth in that I didn't blow streams of vapor when she came down from time to time...or as you put it I didn't "vape like a mad person". lol
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