JULY CONTEST!! WIN $25.00 shopping spree

[stols001]

The terminator came around and explained he could breastfeed if he wanted, as he is programmed to both terminate and nurture but he wasn't "big in practice" with the nurturing part.

He also said, "You human animals with your bodily functions and love sheesh," and turned to exit but I realized Princess had just rolled up a tube of tobacco and had a lighter concealed somewhere and she was busily smoking while going, "If only I'd had a gun, I'd be dead right now," and then the vendor came out and announced.

"GET. OFF. MAH. PROPERTY."

So, we----

 

[Anise]

took the tobacco from the princess - I let the Terminator do that because she scratched and bit-gathered up the pupkids in a show basket and the Terminator picked up the princess. I told her "Keep smoking that stuff and you won't need a gun"
We told her dad goodbye and walked out of vapor land into the hot summer sunshine. The Terminator asked "Now where?" at which the princess perked up and said........

 

[jdy]

with a dozen pup-kids we need somewhere safe for them to grow until their weaned. Somewhere they'll be safe to run and grow. How about we go back to the cow pasture there was plenty of food and water and room for the dozen or we could go to my fathers castle....

 

[Anise]

"The castle sounds perfect, let's go there" So as the sun set on a beautiful summer day our procession made its way to the castle, stopping only when one of the pupkids escaped the basket or had to go potty.
"I have to say Princess Lily,......

 

[jdy]

We're Off To See The Wizard The Wonderful Wizard of Oz. As we ran in the poppy field towards the castle the three of us and the basket full of pup-kids I began getting very sleepy, I noticed the princess and all the babies were already down and sleeping and the Terminator had fallen to his knees. As I fell into a deep sleep my dreams swirled into....

 

[stols001]

I realized that narcolepsy sucks and I carefully tumbled to the ground, snoring.

 

[Anise]

The summer sun shone down on us except for the pup-kids who were in the shade of the poppies. As we began to get bad sunburns we woke up to the sight of monkeys flying over us to the castle.
"Lily, who the heck is your family?"

 

[jdy]

well Daddy has taken in several different species we're sort of a blended family.

Everyone Daddy brought home when they were left alone and so small just needing help. I can't wait for you to meet them and please try to be nice, some just don't see that there is any differences we all look the same to them. From the flying monkeys to the dogs that can change shape and then there are the cats that are really tigers but just believe they are lap cats. OH and the....

 

[Anise]

I fainted. Me, the tough guy. Actually fainted. I stood up shaking slightly. "Must be leftover from the poppies" I shook my head and before she continued to list her strange and wondrous family I said "As long as they let me vape I'm sure everything will be fine. They're your family. It'll be OK." I hoped.

 

[stols001]

Inside, I knew the Elephant and I wouldn't get along. I remembered him, and I KNEW he remembered me. "Don't panic quite yet," I whispered tenderly to myself. "Almost everything in this tale hasn't gone the way I thought it would. He may not remember me, or he might REMEMBER me INSTANTLY but just be a simple rhinoceros."

I turned to look at my Princess and---

 

[jdy]

said you know Elephants they truly never forget anything and well there is a really big Pink Elephant in the room. This particular .... well I'll just say mammal …. this particular mammal and I had a huge altercation back in my home town. I didn't realize he would turn out to be related to me and I suppose the way it all happened was pretty silly.

But Lilly I think he's glaring at me, you need to go tell him we have come home in peace to raise the Pup-kids and we can each just stay on different sides of the room if that will help.

The Princess turned to me and asked, just what was the problem between us, what am I walking into.....

 

[stols001]

"It's kind of embarrassing," I whispered. "I approached him from behind and moved his tail out of the way, and whispered, "Is that all the trunk that you've got?"

Well, I quickly realized I was a bit confused about his anatomy but due to his EAR size he still heard me and I backed up very quickly and left at high speed but he threw hay at me all the way to the door...."

Princess Lilydew gave me a look, a kind of, "Is this really the issue and matter you expect me to resolve," disdainful sort of look.

She went over to the elephant, and this look of smug satisfaction crossed his face, then she returned to my side.

"What did you do?" I asked.
"Told him you were a puny human and the only TRUNKS you got are the ones you made out of scrap lumber."

I immediately began to wonder about my manhood, and looked at the litter of twelve puppies. I went over to the elephant and said "HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU PROUCE per LIVE BIRTH."

By this time all the other relatives----

 

[Anise]

had gathered around us. I wasn't sure if this was a private circus, a freak show or really her family. Thinking of my large litter of kids I knew it was the latter. Who would have thought, on that summer day so long ago, how wrong a story could go if you looked away.
I looked around at my new family and......

 

[stols001]

Decided that divorce in this situation might mean much the same thing as in a Mafia Family, you know the big D word, "Death."

Given that Gottleib was in charge of the whole thing, I asked if I could "go through the initiation process."

"Sure," he answered, a smug look crossing his face." He presented his vape and said, "Kiss it."
Wondering if he meant "with tongue" I knelt near the bottom of his mod.

"Not there," he said, even more smugly and turned his vape around. "You need to kiss the driptip."


My mind whirling, I turned to look at my options but---

 

[Anise]

there were none that would allow me to leave and live happily ever after with my spouses and the pup-kids so I did the only thing I could do. I kissed the drip-tip then looked up shamefully, hoping that was it.......

 

[jdy]

I asked now do I get to vape with it, I could really use a vape right now, what you got in there anyway? He responded NO get your own I don't share vape and it's my own special blend of beef liver and onion! I quickly thought Thank God he doesn't share I might have barfed.

I reached in my pocket and used my own MOD and turning to find my princess I bumped into....

 

[stols001]

A talking monkey selling peanuts ."Don't you dare ask how this happened!" he shrieked,

 

[jdy]

OK! OK! I moved on and kept looking for Lillydew, I found her nursing the pup-kids. As she put them all to sleep I asked her to give me a tour of the castle, I want to see it all.

She thought that would be a perfect adventure and directed the Terminator to sit with the babies, then she gruffly barked "I'll Be Back" and we took off to explore the.....

 

[Anise]

depths of the castle. We passed pigs with three eyes, chickens with five legs so everyone could get a drumstick, ducks with leopard fur (they make the softest coats) and then reached the torture chamber in the basement. The large black door creaked open when Lily pushed it revealing......

 

[stols001]

Mr. Grey and his "funjoy" room. I went up to Mr. Grey and started to choke him hard, muttering, "Whomever created you needs to burn in hell," only he appeared to be enjoying that, so I told princess Lillydew to hurry up and help me and we collected all his sadistic instruments and tied him to the radiator. He begged, "Cuff me at least! Make it hurt!" But princess Lillydew answered, "No way dude." We locked the door behind us, and threw away the key with the full knowledge that he would slowly die of thirst,

"Crud," I muttered to myself. "He would probably enjoy that." So we brought peanut monkey to the dungeon with firm instructions to feed and water Mr. Grey and like, he began weeping uncontrollably.

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