Make me laugh....get a FREE SmokeStik disposable

[spazatabc]

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was
really .......

She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the
driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!"

The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke
up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box
gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.

Confused because the box was smaller than she'd expected, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway and brought
the box back in the house.

She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.

Bob has been missing since Friday.

 

[suddenly]

 

[suddenly]

FOR OUR QUEEN

 

[lorikay13]

This happened when I was in my mid-twenties or so...

Anyone who has pets has fleas, there's no way around it... and I am extremely allergic to flea bites. I can even feel exactly where the little buggers are feasting on me. And since you can't smash them or drown them, I have perfected the art of picking them off between my thumbnail and forefinger... and then crushing them between my 2 thumbnails. I get to see how much of my blood they got (ha!!) while I watch the welt grow in that spot... so it serves them right!!!

A friend of mine back then was telling me about how ammonia is supposed to drown/kill them, so he keeps a jar of it handy just for that purpose when he catches them. I never tried it myself, but I took his word for it.

One time I was over at his place with a few of our friends and someone noticed the little jar of clear liquid, with some tiny black specs floating around in it, and asked him what it was. So he proceeded to explain his whole flea killing theory to everyone in the room... while one girl just sat there staring at the jar with a puzzled look on her face.

Finally she spoke up and said, "There's just one thing I don't understand... how do you get them to jump in there in the first place???"

well look who's back? LOL......nice to see you spacekitty!

You already have a lanyard but I will certainly be happy to send you a disposable for that story......that IS funny!

I'm still waffling on the other two winners...I'll get back to you all later today. Cheers!

PS...suddenly.....I was able to find the videos by looking at my email announcements....I don't know WTF is going on with utube and ECF ......does anyone know?

 

[spacekitty]

The ECF was down for most of the day a couple of days ago...

And no, I don't have one of the SS Lanyards because I couldn't afford the shipping... (had to save up for my Power Supply... lol)

But I actually DID win one of the disposables in that other contest and never received it. I didn't say anything about it since you have always been so generous with me... although I had wanted it to give to one of my neighbors...

So... I guess the 3rd time's a charm!!! (glad you liked the story about the "Flea Jar"!!)

 

[thehangdude]

It has been a bit cool in the mornings here. By afternoon, it is beautiful "drive with your windows down" weather.

Well I got up the other morning, and after my morning ritual (read: coffee) I started my truck. By the time I got where I was going, my heater was still blowing cold. So I take it into my mechanic (a good friend of mine). I tell him my heater core needs blown out.

See, with my old truck, the fluid that keeps your engine cool is the same fluid used to heat your feet. So I figured something got into the lines to block the water flow in the truck's cab.

So I take off the water line that goes into the cab, and I take off the water line that comes out of the cab. My friend brings out his compressor hose, and he blows air through the one line. This causes everything out of the core and out the other line.

I put everything back together and fill up the fluids. Start truck and let it warm up.

About 20 minutes later, we go out to see if the heater is working. I climb in the cab, and as I am turning on the heater, I notice it is set to "Cool". It has been set to "Cool" since yesturday's warm afternoon. I turn it to "Warm", and my heater works great! "Yeah, it works good now!" I proclaim.

 

[lorikay13]

Now THAT is a winner!!!!!!!! Did you ever get a lanyard for your wife hangdude? I'm sorry I really can't remember.....




right...did I forget to mention that if people want a prize....they have to PM me and tell me what they want???? You don't even have to register at SS...I know damn well your never going to buy anything....plus if I sent it to you you will get other cool stuff.....like candy cigarettes and necklaces...hehe. Joan dear....did I scare you off with our last conversation...I never got an answer back from you.....I do know where to send you prize though so I 'll just go ahead and send it. But I know there is a couple others that have never come back and looked to see that they won..this is the last time I'm going to mention it.

ISDN and Mastiff Mike...hello?????????? WTF? you want this stuff or not? ISDN your only getting it so you don't go out and kill my relatives...hehe. Depending on what Hangdude says about a lanyard then that leave you other two gents.....either of you interested?

I think I will just close this thread now. It's pretty pathetic when your so reviled no one even wants something for free.....sniff,sniff.