The first time I got sent to rehab like, I shared a room with a domestically violence victim who was like, also a security guard at a K-mart. It must have made for a decent excuse.
I had no idea like, rehab was going to be so boooooorrrrrinnng. I mean yeah, talking to the dude with the steel plate in his head who obsessively drank coffee like 50 pots a day like distracting him that was sort of fun, Assisting the two ...... addicts in their loveforsaken "I must have some feel good chemicals" in their romance, well that was fun. A lot of it was SUPER DULL.
I was not prepared. She was. She had brought a lot of romance novels, and they were NOT the good ones (like any genre, some are better than others,"
It WAS the place where I first read LAUGHED OUT LOUD (for the first time in rehab) as I committed to like , epic memory forever, "He was the shoooting star in her milky way."


I might forget my kid's name if I get the big A, but I will remember that phrase forever.
Also, I think it might be the first time I realized accurate like, observations and assessments of others had POWER. Because I DID realize I would need a doodle pad, I needed one in SCHOOL. They took it from me. Those turds.
So I began a speech fast, I guess one would call it meaning "You don't let me doodle, I don't talk."
That week in community group, they demanded I participate. So, I looked up at each one of them (staff included) and gave them a pithy summary of what the hellt their problem was, and how they could solve it.
They asked me what my problem was: "Staff member X felt the need to steal my doodlepad. I think I can dooodle and think and observe just all at the same time."
REHAB. NO PLEASING THEM!!!!!!! I mean they were all AT me to be like "I'm Anna and I'm an alcoholic," and so finally I was like, "SHUT UP ALREADY FINE." So I said it and then it was all like, "Yeah, you shoudn't say it if you don't mean it."
I told them they would just make for a HORRIBLE boss. I never worked for a rehab man I know my limits...
That went unexpected.. Ahem, sorry DRAGON PV with a blue LED. Yep.
Anna