Good morning mixologists. I slept in til 9. Goodness knows I needed it. Holy ghost this week was unpleasant. Today shall be my day of mostly rest.
The husband went out to look at the houses we found without waking me up. That was so cool of him because we have this stupid practice (that needs to be remedied if you ask me) of going to look at the EXTERIOR of a house and if we like it, seeing the inside. That is just dumb and twice the work plus in this market you gotta jump. I think our realtor is either kinda lazy or taking the houses "We" find and showing them to other people first. Just me though I could be wrong.
It's still too much work. I may have mentioned this already my memories of most of the week are kinda hazy.. Today will be my day of (more) restfulness. Tomorrow I can do more heavy lifting. Most likely. Oh, I want to organize the living room more but right now, I just want to wake up. And clothes. My clothing mess is a disgrace etc.
But well, happy to be alive, or more so. Yesterday evening the husband and I had this exchange:
Me (wistfully): "Don't you just ever wish you could go to sleep and never wake up?"
Him: "Well why don't you?"
Me: "Are you egging me on to suicide?'
Him: "No. I thought you were hyperbolically expressing your fatigue."
Me: "No, that is NOT what I was doing if I did that I would use a different metaphor. Do you know what exactly "Go to sleep and not wake up means."
"15 or so minutes of a really dumb argument chaos ensued."
Can't beat marriage sometimes, not that I do not love the husband more than anyone. Well I also like him. Usually. I love the kid a bunch but well, he's not as likable at present. Oh, I call. I feel like we have the same conversation over and over, I think in some ways we both are avoiding it. Sigh. Probably just me. Been feeling ah, negative of late. Today is the first day I feel halfway normal and that means dumping my Ambien (again) hoping it will be easier this time around. Probably. It doesn't make me feel ill and etc. It's just harder to sleep.
Still at 1/3 to 1/2 my Neurontin I'm like meh, take less, utilize your tolerance break for good, not evil. As I have decided I hate all meds. I know I have to take SOME but I'm going to work on it.
Anna