Hahaha...yeah i love this one...i think i posted that in a video thread around here...but for sure hilarious!!!
Have you guys seen this
(PLEASE READ)
Kid Gets Detention for Repeating Joke From 'The Office' - TV Squad
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Hahaha...yeah i love this one...i think i posted that in a video thread around here...but for sure hilarious!!!
Have you guys seen this
(PLEASE READ)
Kid Gets Detention for Repeating Joke From 'The Office' - TV Squad
lol yeah I don't remember where I first saw it but remembered last night that I had it in my youtube faves list.
@ the detention thing
The first blonde guy joke?
The very first ever Blonde GUY joke..... And well worth the wait!
An Irishman , a Mexican and a Blonde Guy were doing construction work on
scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building.
They were eating lunch and the Irishman said,'Corned beef and cabbage!
If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I'm going to
jump off this building.'
The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed, 'Burritos again! If I
get burritos one more time I'm going to jump off, too.'
The blonde opened his lunch and said, 'Bolognaagain! If I get a bologna
sandwich one more time, I'm jumping too..'
The next day, the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef and
cabbage, and jumped to his death.
The Mexican opened his lunch, saw a burrito, and jumped, too.
The blonde guy opened his lunch, saw the bologna and jumped to his death
as well.
At the funeral, the Irishman's wife was weeping. She said, 'If I'd known
how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage, I never would have
given it to him again!'
The Mexican's wife also wept and said, 'I could have given him tacos or
enchiladas! I didn't realize he hated burritos so much.'
(Oh this is GOOD!!)
Everyone turned and stared at the blonde's wife. The blonde's wife said,
'Don't look at me. The idiot makes his own lunch.'
The very first ever Blonde GUY joke..... And well worth the wait!
An Irishman , a Mexican and a Blonde Guy were doing construction work on
scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building.
They were eating lunch and the Irishman said,'Corned beef and cabbage!
If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I'm going to
jump off this building.'
The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed, 'Burritos again! If I
get burritos one more time I'm going to jump off, too.'
The blonde opened his lunch and said, 'Bolognaagain! If I get a bologna
sandwich one more time, I'm jumping too..'
The next day, the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef and
cabbage, and jumped to his death.
The Mexican opened his lunch, saw a burrito, and jumped, too.
The blonde guy opened his lunch, saw the bologna and jumped to his death
as well.
At the funeral, the Irishman's wife was weeping. She said, 'If I'd known
how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage, I never would have
given it to him again!'
The Mexican's wife also wept and said, 'I could have given him tacos or
enchiladas! I didn't realize he hated burritos so much.'
(Oh this is GOOD!!)
Everyone turned and stared at the blonde's wife. The blonde's wife said,
'Don't look at me. The idiot makes his own lunch.'
Even though I'm not a blonde...it's so very nice to see the men getting equal harrassment nowadays! 
Very funny, Nut!
Very funny, Nut!
As men age, we start seeing more of the medical world, which nowadays seems to include an increasing number of women as our physicians and therapists, and in my case, a new urologist.
My family doctor recently referred me to - a just out of medical school female
urologist. I saw her yesterday, and she's absolutely drop-dead gorgeous as
well as unbelievably sexy.
She told me that I must stop .........ing.
I asked her why.
She said, "Because I'm trying to examine you..."
My family doctor recently referred me to - a just out of medical school female
urologist. I saw her yesterday, and she's absolutely drop-dead gorgeous as
well as unbelievably sexy.
She told me that I must stop .........ing.
I asked her why.
She said, "Because I'm trying to examine you..."
"I am amazed at radio DJ's today. I am firmly convinced that AM on my radio stands for Absolute ...... I will not begin to tell you what FM stands for."
-Jasper Carrott
-Jasper Carrott
google never ceases to amaze me... search for one thing and come up with things that it doesn't seem there is any way possible you should find lol
and when I saw this one I figured it fit for this thread
and when I saw this one I figured it fit for this thread
LOL @ Thy and Nico then Thy some more! Ahh these threads are needed!
Girls night out
Two women friends had gone out for a Girls Night Out, and had been decidedly over-enthusiastic on the cocktails. Incredibly drunk and walking home they suddenly realized they both needed to pee. They were very near a graveyard and one of them suggested they do their business behind a headstone or something. The first woman had nothing to wipe with so she took off her panties, used them and threw them away. Her friend however was wearing an expensive underwear set and didn't want to ruin hers, but was lucky enough to salvage a large ribbon from a wreath that was on a grave and proceeded to wipe herself with it. After finishing, they made their way home.
The next day the first woman's husband phones the other husband and said, "These damn girls nights out have got to stop. My wife came home last night without her panties." "That's nothing," said the other. "Mine came back with a sympathy card stuck between the cheeks of her .... that said, 'From all of us at the Fire Station, Well never forget you!'
Girls night out
Two women friends had gone out for a Girls Night Out, and had been decidedly over-enthusiastic on the cocktails. Incredibly drunk and walking home they suddenly realized they both needed to pee. They were very near a graveyard and one of them suggested they do their business behind a headstone or something. The first woman had nothing to wipe with so she took off her panties, used them and threw them away. Her friend however was wearing an expensive underwear set and didn't want to ruin hers, but was lucky enough to salvage a large ribbon from a wreath that was on a grave and proceeded to wipe herself with it. After finishing, they made their way home.
The next day the first woman's husband phones the other husband and said, "These damn girls nights out have got to stop. My wife came home last night without her panties." "That's nothing," said the other. "Mine came back with a sympathy card stuck between the cheeks of her .... that said, 'From all of us at the Fire Station, Well never forget you!'
LOL...Probably a true story Iken. Had to email some of these to my buddy in PA.
'MARIJUANA FILLED FIREWOOD?
'Hello, is this the Sheriff's Office?'
'Yes. What can I do for you?'
'I'm calling to report 'bout my neighbor Virgil Smith.....He's hidin'
marijuana inside his firewood! Don't quite know how he gets it inside
them logs, but he's hidin' it there..'
'Thank you very much for the call, sir.'
The next day, twelve Sheriff's Deputies descend on Virgil's house. They
search the shed where the firewood is kept.
Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no marijuana.
They sneer at Virgil and leave.
Shortly, the phone rings at Virgil's house..
'Hey, Virgil! This here's Floyd....Did the Sheriff come?'
'Yeah!'
'Did they chop your firewood?'
'Yep!'
'Happy Birthday, buddy!'
(Rednecks know how to get'r done).
'MARIJUANA FILLED FIREWOOD?
'Hello, is this the Sheriff's Office?'
'Yes. What can I do for you?'
'I'm calling to report 'bout my neighbor Virgil Smith.....He's hidin'
marijuana inside his firewood! Don't quite know how he gets it inside
them logs, but he's hidin' it there..'
'Thank you very much for the call, sir.'
The next day, twelve Sheriff's Deputies descend on Virgil's house. They
search the shed where the firewood is kept.
Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no marijuana.
They sneer at Virgil and leave.
Shortly, the phone rings at Virgil's house..
'Hey, Virgil! This here's Floyd....Did the Sheriff come?'
'Yeah!'
'Did they chop your firewood?'
'Yep!'
'Happy Birthday, buddy!'
(Rednecks know how to get'r done).
iken and nicotime -- too good.
I get the jokes from friends in emails. One guy especially usually has good ones.
I get the jokes from friends in emails. One guy especially usually has good ones.
Ok I read this today and cracked up so I had to share it.
Pfizer Corp. announced today that ...... will soon be available in liquid form, and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer. It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of "cocktails", "highballs" and just a good old-fashioned "stiff drink". Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of:
MOUNT & DO.
Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast implants and ...... today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.
Pfizer Corp. announced today that ...... will soon be available in liquid form, and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer. It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of "cocktails", "highballs" and just a good old-fashioned "stiff drink". Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of:
MOUNT & DO.
Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast implants and ...... today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.
Hahaha...I wonder if they will use the generic brand of .........Myedyxadril I think its called.
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