www.GreenhouseOne.com | FREE eLiquid Sample Pack (31 Favors)

[36tinybells]

An Englishman, a Scott, and a Irishman walked into a pub.
Each orderd a pint of beer. Then a fly landed in each one's beer.

The Englishman, turning slightly green, pushed his beer away and asked for another one.

The Scott took the fly out, shrugged, and drank his beer.

The Irisman pinched the fly between his fingers and yelled
"SPIT IT OUT!" "SPIT IT OUT!"

 

[Natalia]

Everyone should shop at Greenhouse One... why? Because we LOVE these contests and must support Tim!

 

[toto1013]

Blonde and the Western
A blonde and her husband are laying in bed watching TV, an old western is on.

The husband says to his wife, "I bet you breakfast in bed that the covered wagon hits a rock and the driver falls out dead," "You're on," returned his wife.

They watch the western and sure enough the wagon hits a rock in the dirt road and the driver falls out of the wagon ... dead.

The wife gets out of bed and returns shortly with a tray of food.

After eating the husband says, "I have to admit that I saw this movie before."

She in turn confesses, "I saw the movie before too.

But I didn't think he was stupid enough to ride over the same rock twice...."

 

[Odium]

Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Cash!
Cash who?
No thanks, but I’d like some peanuts!

 

[Smocha]

LOL'ed at this one haha

An Englishman, a Scott, and a Irishman walked into a pub.
Each orderd a pint of beer. Then a fly landed in each one's beer.

The Englishman, turning slightly green, pushed his beer away and asked for another one.

The Scott took the fly out, shrugged, and drank his beer.

The Irisman pinched the fly between his fingers and yelled
"SPIT IT OUT!" "SPIT IT OUT!"

 

[Optimo]

One night, a police officer was staking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible violations of driving under the influence laws. At closing time he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb, and try his keys on five different cars before he found his. Then he sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several minutes. Finally everyone left the bar and drove off, and he started his engine and began to pull away.

The police officer was waiting for him. He stopped the driver, read him his rights and administered the Breathalyzer test. The results showed a reading of 0.0. The puzzled officer demanded to know how that could be. The driver replied, "Tonight, I'm the Designated Decoy."

 

[light487]

Someone should shop at GH1 because of their great prices!

Saying the same thing over and over again every 2 hours is not really in the spirit of the competition... it's actually a little annoying, to be honest.

 

[rbuck9]

everyone should shop at GH1 because of their great cs

 

[Natalia]

As we SilverSurfers know, sometimes we have trouble with our computers.

I had a problem yesterday, so I called Eric, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control and asked him to come over.

Eric clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.

As he was walking away, I called after him, 'So, what was wrong ?

He replied, 'It was an ID ten T error.'

I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired,

'An, ID ten T error ? What's that? In case I need to fix it again.'

Eric grinned ....'Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before ?

'No,' I replied.

'Write it down,' he said, 'and I think you'll figure it out.'

So I wrote down:
ID10T

I used to like Eric, the little .

 

[36tinybells]

An 80 year old man was having his annual checkup and the doctor asked him how he was feeling.
"I've never been better!" he boasted. "I've got an eighteen year old bride who's pregnant and having my child! What do you think about that?"
The doctor considered this for a moment, then said, "Let me tell you a story. I knew a guy who was an avid hunter. He never missed a season. But one day went out in a bit of a hurry and he accidentally grabbed his umbrella instead of his gun." The doctor continued, "So he was in the woods and suddenly a grizzly bear appeared in front of him! He raised up his umbrella, pointed it at the bear and squeezed the handle."
"And do you know what happened?" the doctor queried.
Dumbfounded, the old man replied "No."
The doctor continued, "The bear dropped dead in front of him!"
"That's impossible!" exclaimed the old man. "Someone else must have shot that bear."
"That's kind of what I'm getting at..." replied the doctor

 

[Lauralie]

Hung Chow calls into work and says, 'Hey, I no come work

Today, I really sick . Got headache, stomach ache and legs Hurt, I no
come work.'

The boss says, 'You know something, Hung Chow, I really Need you
today. When I feel sick like you do, I go to my Wife and tell her to
give me Sex. That Makes everything Better and I go to work.. You try
that.'

Two hours later Hung Chow calls again. 'I do what You Say and I feel
Great. I be at work soon.........

By the way - You got Nice house'

 

[Loveridden]

Three men were waiting at Heaven's Gate. St. Peter says, "OK, guys, pretty much anything goes up here, but whatever you do, never lie, or you will spend the rest of eternity with the ugliest women in the universe."

So they all agree and are admitted in. The first guy makes it a week before he lies about how rich he was on Earth. Bam! Right at his side appears the ugliest woman he had ever seen.

The second guy makes it another couple weeks before he lies about how smart he is. Bam! At his side appears the second ugliest woman in the universe.

So the first two guys are walking around with their monsters of women when they see their third friend walking with the hottest woman ever conceived by man. The first two guys say in unison, "How did you land with that babe when we get stuck with these nasty women?"

He nudges the babe and says, "Tell them." She says to the first two guys, "I lied."

 

[Optimo]

After hearing that one of the patients in a mental hospital had saved another from a suicide attempt by pulling him out of a bathtub, the hospital director reviewed the rescuer's file and called him into his office.

"Mr. Jones, your records and your heroic behavior indicate that you're ready to go home. I'm sorry to tell you that the man you saved later hanged himself."

"Oh, he didn't hang himself," Mr. Jones replied. "I hung him up to dry."

 

[bikergirl1908]

For good prices and good product, everyone should shop at GH-1.

 

[light487]

With all of the recent siezures by Australian customs, it is comforting to know that should the order be siezed, GH1 will refund! Add to this the great prices and range of products available and I can't think of anywhere else I'd rather by my niquid from.

 

[toto1013]

Football Blonde
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to a football game for the first time. Afterwards, he asked her how she liked the game.

"Oh, I really liked it," she said, "but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other for 25 cents."

"What on earth do you mean???"

"Well, I saw them flip a coin, and one team got it, and then, for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was: 'Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!'"

 

[Lorizgal]

How to those wonderful people south of the border cut their pizza's? with leeeeetle Ceasers.

 

[woody55]

A blonde had just totaled her car in a horrific accident. Miraculously, she managed to pry herself from the wreckage without a scratch and was applying fresh lipstick when the state trooper arrived.
"My God!" the trooper gasped. "Your car looks like an accordion that was stomped on by an elephant. Are you OK ma'am?"
"Yes, officer, I'm just fine" the blonde chirped.
"Well, how in the world did this happen?" the officer asked as he surveyed the wrecked car.
"Officer, it was the strangest thing!" the blonde began. I was driving along this road when from out of nowhere this TREE pops up in front of me. So I swerved to the right, and there was another tree! I swerved to the left and there was ANOTHER tree! I served to the right and there was another tree! I swerved to the left and there was ...."
"Uh, ma'am", the officer said, cutting her off, "There isn't a tree on this road for 30 miles. That was your air freshener swinging back and forth."

 

[36tinybells]

Preamble - Murphy Arrives in America

Paddy Murphy arrived at Boston's Logon airport and wandered about the terminal with tears streaming down his cheeks. An Texan asked him if he was homesick.

'No, 'replied the Irishman.' It's worse, I have I've lost all me luggage.'

'That's terrible, how did that happen?'

'The cork fell out of me bottle.' Said Paddy.

 

[Optimo]

An old man goes to the doctor for a physical, his wife tagging along. When the doctor enters the examination room, he tells the old man, "I need a urine sample, a stool sample and a sperm sample." The old man, being hard of hearing, looks at his wife and yells: "WHAT?" "What did he say? What does he want?" His wife yells back, "He needs your underwear."