Depression

[Friend of Atlas]

I'm really sorry you're so stuck right now. It sounds like your Dr.'s aren't helping either. I know this probably doesn't help, but I'm not really cooking or doing the laundry right now, so at least you're able to do that! We have been eating crappy take out for 6 months or so... It's not helping the financial situation either!

I don't think it's all in your head. I think it's an debilitating illness that for those afflicted feels shameful and for those that aren't they can't (or don't want to) understand (except for the truly empathetic like jj2).

Something that has helped me a little is getting my boys (11 & 9) to help out around the house. My 11yo now does his own laundry and the 9 yo folds his. I'm not super picky about the foldng job which helps. They are both responsible for the garbage and recycling. They have to clear the table at night and empty the dishwasher. If they don't do these things they don't enjoy privileges like TV or Wii. We have had alot of fights about these chores and it's taken awhile to train them, but we are getting there. They also seem to go through phases when they are willing to cooperate and we don't fight as much then. My 11yo is much better at following directions then the 9yo, but age and personality differences factor in there. Now if I could only clean my room and set a better example for them! Making them do these chores seems to have stregthened our relationship though, when they do a good job I always make sure to tell them.

Hang in there Poisonette, we are here to help or just listen when you need to vent...

Found this forum from a link in another forum. Thanks for creating it. It's somewhat comforting to know I'm not the only one out there with this problem. In my day-to-day life it seems like it. I get no support from anyone because apparently my depression doesn't exist. "It's all in your head" um... yea it is, thanks for noticing. My depression is chemical. At 35 the only pains I suffer from are concidered normal or depression related. Yep, those Cymbalta commercials are right: Depression Hurts.
I've been depressed for years. Since my teens I've been struggling with the "I don't care" attitude along with the "I'm too tired", "I don't want to", and "Does it matter?" Top it off I get anxiety attacks that cripple me. I'd rather crawl in bed than deal with life. And now it's November and my Seasonal Affective Disorder is kicking in: Hibernation Time! If only I could get away with it. I live with my Mom, my 16yr old daughter, my 4yr old son, and my 40yr old husband who's not dealing with his own problems. Yea, we're not doing too good. And my father past away in July. I've got responsibilties that I have to do daily and it's hard to get those done. I cook dinner every night, clean up after my son & husband, do laundry for the whole house.
I too have the caged animal feeling much of the time. I'd rather be in bed right now asleep and away from the world than cooking dinner like I am right now.

Medications themselves area now a problem since I apparently am sensitive to drugs. Side effects are annoying and most outweigh the benefits of the meds. The psychiatrist around here don't like listening to an educated patient. They like those patients who just take their meds & shut up. They feel this "magic drug of the month" will cure all my problems, if it doesn't, they just up the dose regardless of the effects.

As you can tell, I'm currently stuck in a depressive rut. I'm trying, and that's the best I can do for now.

 

[Nighthawk]

Hang in there poisonette! We're all in this together, and believe me, we've been there and are there. (((hugs)))

Dear Nyxie, THANK YOU for the website FlyLady.net: Your personal online coach to help you gain control of your house and home I am starting the program today and I have hopes of it saving my life and household. You are my angel! Big Loves being sent your way!

 

[poisonette]

Hang in there poisonette! We're all in this together, and believe me, we've been there and are there. (((hugs)))

Dear Nyxie, THANK YOU for the website FlyLady.net: Your personal online coach to help you gain control of your house and home I am starting the program today and I have hopes of it saving my life and household. You are my angel! Big Loves being sent your way!

Thank you Nyxie AND Nighthawk. I love the idea of starting so simply.

 

[Nyxie]

Aww Thanks! I hope it works for you. I love the fly lady website. I even have an app for my iphone called home routines. It is based on the zones you will see on the fly lady site. You can check off the list as you do them an it has a built in 15 minute timerlol. I think it was 3 bucks but worth it to me lol. Usually don't spend money on iphone apps.

 

[Nighthawk]

It's been harder than I thought to keep started, but I am determined! Breaking it down to 15 minutes is helping. Starting small is great. I am getting all the kids involved too, that's not easy either! They were ok with working for 15 minutes though. With 4 kids old enough to do chores, it's going to add up. Following a plan someone else has thought up is a big help. I just have to follow the plan and check off the list. I can Do This!

 

[Friend of Atlas]

It's been harder than I thought to keep started, but I am determined! Breaking it down to 15 minutes is helping. Starting small is great. I am getting all the kids involved too, that's not easy either! They were ok with working for 15 minutes though. With 4 kids old enough to do chores, it's going to add up. Following a plan someone else has thought up is a big help. I just have to follow the plan and check off the list. I can Do This!

That's great Nighthawk! I believe you can do it too; you're already doing it. I think I'm going to try this as well. Today I'm going to clean my sink. I like the idead of only working in 15 minute increments. I think it will really help both my kids & I.

 

[CarrieM]

Just found this thread.. yes, I suffer from Depression and anxiety. Working with my Dr to get some relief, right now I am on Cymbalta and Ativan to help control it. I can totally relate to the depression not making you care about anything. Been there. and still am. Some days it seems like it's not worth getting out of bed. I would love to join the private room to talk. Depression support groups are few and far between in my area and it would be nice to discuss with others that share the same issues. I am not comfortable about sharing everything in open forum. but my life has been anything but easy over the years.

 

[poisonette]

Ugh, I hate shoes! They've bugged me since I was a kid. I'm *happier* barefoot.
Think I'm skipping just this last part of it. Everything but the shoes.


Wecome Carrie. Having a place to just vent is nice. Sometimes just reading that I'm not alone is helpful.

 

[Nyxie]

Hi Carrie. I have heard about the private room , but never actually been there. Maybe one of the other people can enlighten both of us. Although I may never leave if I go LOL.
I have small issues compared to some people here but issues non the less. I have counselors over the yrs and taken paxil, welbutrin and celexa finally worked mainly for anxiety attacks and depresion I didn't know existed. I never forget how I felt before and am finally learning to use the tools I am taught to cope better. It really does help to know there are other people and we are not alone.

Anyone shine thier sink today, shoes or not ? I did LOL I love my shiney sink now and it really sucks because my dishwasher broke a few weeks ago. I ordered a new one and it was suppose to be delivered Monday but they called today and now it isnt coming until Black Friday. Lucky I don't go shop that day.

 

[Friend of Atlas]

Hi Carrie. I have heard about the private room , but never actually been there. Maybe one of the other people can enlighten both of us. Although I may never leave if I go LOL.
I have small issues compared to some people here but issues non the less. I have counselors over the yrs and taken paxil, welbutrin and celexa finally worked mainly for anxiety attacks and depresion I didn't know existed. I never forget how I felt before and am finally learning to use the tools I am taught to cope better. It really does help to know there are other people and we are not alone.

Anyone shine thier sink today, shoes or not ? I did LOL I love my shiney sink now and it really sucks because my dishwasher broke a few weeks ago. I ordered a new one and it was suppose to be delivered Monday but they called today and now it isnt coming until Black Friday. Lucky I don't go shop that day.

Well, I did NOT shine my sink today. I planned to, but just never brought myself to do it. I did bake some cookies and bring them to the church potluck tonight. My anxiety's getting better though, because I didn't know anyone there and I wasn't freaking out or nervous. My son is in the choir at the Anglican church and they are always so nice (I volunteered for the HUGE jumble sale last month) that I thought I would try it out even though I don't like big groups. I think I did okay. I met two other parents and had an okay generic conversation with them.

I'll keep on trying... I won't shine my sink tomorrow because I'm super busy all day, but I will do it Sat Morning before I leave the house (I'll let the bleach sit and finish it up when I get home). I promised the boys I'd take them to see Harry Potter on Saturday (first show matinee style ). I'm putting it on the phone calendar. If it's scheduled I'm better at following through...

 

[CarrieM]

I don't go out on Black Friday myself. I can't handle to crowds. I would rather sit online and order everything

 

[Nighthawk]

the private room is a place here that anyone given the password can get in and talk more privately about whatever.... It saves the police from being called when the 'screaming fit' urge comes out. lol it does help. PM me or JJ to get the password. Carrie & Nyxie, I'll send it to you soon as I remember where I put it. lol
I do love this place and the support it provides for so many folks here, with whatever battle we're fighting. People that have been there, that understand what the heck we're going through, people that have found out of the ordinary solutions... it's all just a wonderful blessing!

 

[Nighthawk]

yeah! I remembered where I put it! Go ME! lol

 

[poisonette]

Well, I did NOT shine my sink today. I planned to, but just never brought myself to do it. I did bake some cookies and bring them to the church potluck tonight. My anxiety's getting better though, because I didn't know anyone there and I wasn't freaking out or nervous. My son is in the choir at the Anglican church and they are always so nice (I volunteered for the HUGE jumble sale last month) that I thought I would try it out even though I don't like big groups. I think I did okay. I met two other parents and had an okay generic conversation with them.

I'll keep on trying... I won't shine my sink tomorrow because I'm super busy all day, but I will do it Sat Morning before I leave the house (I'll let the bleach sit and finish it up when I get home). I promised the boys I'd take them to see Harry Potter on Saturday (first show matinee style ). I'm putting it on the phone calendar. If it's scheduled I'm better at following through...

No sink today for me. My 4yr old son derailed my plans for the day. He hit his head, needed stitches. He's ok though.

Congrats on the cookies and going to church.

 

[CarrieM]

Thanks Nighthawk

 

[CarrieM]

No sink today for me. My 4yr old son derailed my plans for the day. He hit his head, needed stitches. He's ok though.

Glad to know your son is OK. Back when my youngest son was little they kept promising me our own private room at the ER he was in so much.. not a good thing..

 

[poisonette]

Glad to know your son is OK. Back when my youngest son was little they kept promising me our own private room at the ER he was in so much.. not a good thing..

It helped my stress level that his was his 2nd head bonk like this, 2nd set of stitches. But I admit, when it first happened, I had no clue where the blood was coming from no matter how hard I looked so I called the EMS. Funny now, they missed it too because it was in his hairline. They pointed out a small little blood droplet that looked like it could've been a small wound. Turned out to be gash on the side of his head. Took him to the Childrens Hospital ER, 3 stitches this time. He's doing great now, playing like nothing happened at all, wants to go back to play with the toys.
As far as me, I'm still a little frazzled. What a way to start the day, even before my 1st vape hit.

 

[Nighthawk]

oh yikes! that will turn you gray haired! I have 5 kids.... lol and I'm a nurse. Still freak out a lil bit when they get hurt. No one would know it though to look at me on the outside. was also an EMT. I keep the screaming crying freak out inside until it's all over, everyone's ok and gone to sleep for the night. lol The younger they are the more it upsets me. Biggest reason I will NEVER work in pediatrics.
SO glad your lil man is ok! Kids are amazingly resiliant. (((hugs)))

 

[Nyxie]

Well, I did NOT shine my sink today. I planned to, but just never brought myself to do it. I did bake some cookies and bring them to the church potluck tonight. My anxiety's getting better though, because I didn't know anyone there and I wasn't freaking out or nervous. My son is in the choir at the Anglican church and they are always so nice (I volunteered for the HUGE jumble sale last month) that I thought I would try it out even though I don't like big groups. I think I did okay. I met two other parents and had an okay generic conversation with them.

I'll keep on trying... I won't shine my sink tomorrow because I'm super busy all day, but I will do it Sat Morning before I leave the house (I'll let the bleach sit and finish it up when I get home). I promised the boys I'd take them to see Harry Potter on Saturday (first show matinee style ). I'm putting it on the phone calendar. If it's scheduled I'm better at following through...

Well it sounds like you were pretty busy . I probably wouldnt have shined my sink either LOL

No sink today for me. My 4yr old son derailed my plans for the day. He hit his head, needed stitches. He's ok though.

Congrats on the cookies and going to church.

I am glad your Son is ok. Too bad about the stitches, poor little guy. I worry so much about that with my kids. I am not sure ho I would handle blood from something that needed stitches. The most I ever had to deal with was my bonus daughter broke her arm on a horse ride. The horse was done riding and she was not.

 

[CarrieM]

It helped my stress level that his was his 2nd head bonk like this, 2nd set of stitches. But I admit, when it first happened, I had no clue where the blood was coming from no matter how hard I looked so I called the EMS. Funny now, they missed it too because it was in his hairline. They pointed out a small little blood droplet that looked like it could've been a small wound. Turned out to be gash on the side of his head. Took him to the Childrens Hospital ER, 3 stitches this time. He's doing great now, playing like nothing happened at all, wants to go back to play with the toys.
As far as me, I'm still a little frazzled. What a way to start the day, even before my 1st vape hit.

It's amazing how fast the kids recover. my youngest was my 3rd child so I was used to emergency room visits(my oldest had asthma) but youngest was hell on wheels and was always getting hurt..actually, he kinda still does, and I just got a message last night that he is signing up for the army... Like I need more things to worry about