My decision:
I'm going with Hospice. I may have 3-6 months. With hospice they will keep me comfortable and my quality of life will be the best it can be.
Because I am starting early, instead of waiting till it gets closer to the end, my QoL should get maximized.
I'm at peace with my decision as are my family. I have been suffering so much lately. I'm typing this from another hospital bed. Hospice is completely covered by my insurance and they can get me all the equipment I will need as I need it. Anything I need, be it meds, equipment or whatever, will be brought to my house.
They can provide stronger meds than doctors can. Longer lasting meds.
This decision was not made lightly. I spoke with surgeons, oncologists, doctors and the hospice person. It's time for me to live my life to the best for the time that I can. Not in and out of doctors offices, hospitals or chemo rooms.
All they do for the blockages is give me morphine to rest the intestines, nothing by mouth then onto a clear liquid diet then a full liquid diet. I can do that at home in more peaceful surroundings.
My daughter is here to help my husband. She has worked with mentally disabled and has helped with others that have faced similar challenges. As of now, I'm fully mobile if not a bit weak from not being able to eat much lately. As my husband says, I don't look sick, just a bit too skinny. I will have a drain for the ascites that builds up in my belly so that will help with my appetite.
I've been apprised of what the end will kind of be like. Sedated.
I'm at peace with my decision.