Actually, upon further thought of what you were saying, it makes me think of something I skirted on before but have really been taking notice and giving a lot of consideration lately.
When I first started vaping, my experience was very much "I WANT to vape. I PREFER to vape. I ENJOY vaping."
Then after falling of the wagon, my thoughts have been primarily "I NEED to vape. I SHOULD be vaping. I HAVE to get back to vaping."
And those thoughts are kinda laced with duty, chore and guilt. These are not powerful motivators.
So I have been thinking on this lately that I need to get back to the thoughts before. Because if I relax on it, I really do want, prefer and enjoy vaping more than cigarettes. I really don't like smoking anymore.
I think in either regard - as what you describe or what I am now describing - there is a necessity to get back to that original enjoyment and preferment to vaping. Which really isn't that hard, if you let yourself. Because vaping is better - better for your body, more fun, more control, more ability to tinker, change and dial in different things. It is "guilt-free" in a sense. etc etc.
Anyways, just some more thoughts I had recently that were brought back to the surface as I was out and about considering what you had said.
I went thru some of that too, when I had my month back to smoking. One thing that helped a lot was that I had become conscious of how it actually *felt* to smoke; sure it banishes those cravings lickety-split, but it also really burns your mouth. Now maybe that part seemed worse for me, because I had to take a course of antibiotics after my surgery, one of my incisions became inflamed so they were dosing me with some POWERFUL antibiotics, so naturally I ended up with a raging thrush infection in my mouth -- but vaping didn't hurt it; smoking burned like I was eating pure pepper! It made the inside of my lips feel puckered, dried out, like I'd been eating alum or something.
Another part of it that was really unpleasant was the smell; after I had been outside smoking, as soon as I came back in, I'd have to wash my hands immediately, to get that stink off -- and if I walked over by the front door after I'd been in for a few minutes, I could still smell that stink just from having brought it in on my clothes and breathing it out. And my husband seemed to notice it a lot more too, than he ever did before I ever quit the first time; he became adamant that after I'd been out smoking, that I not approach him and try to talk, for at least a few minutes afterward. He never gave me any grief about the smell, before the first quit, so I can only suppose that the 3 1/2 mo of smoke-free had removed his tolerance for it.
I do know this: I've suffered with depression, anxiety, and myriad low-self-esteem issues my entire life, but quitting smoking has done more for my self-esteem than a lifetime of therapy. I felt this way a bit, after I got sober, after my first year of sobriety, etc, but it never felt this intense -- I've finally done something for myself that I spent over 30 yrs *wishing* I could do, but never could... till e-cigs. And when I went back to smoking, even knowing it was going to be temporary and brief, it just about killed something inside me. When I finally laid them down again, the relief was intense -- I had my self-esteem back. That's why I didn't mind going the WTA route -- whatever it takes, to help me stay smoke-free -- it's completely and entirely worth it.
Andria
I like that site. Bought my whole nic stockpile from them (probably a decade's worth in case of vapepocalypse). It's my primary vaping shop. 
