I will. If anything gets worse I will go.
IDK I hate them pretty severely. My dumb public health doc did not like my Seroquel cholesterol numbers and despite my imploring him NOT to (I tried it once and talked to dead pepe all night and my GOOD east cost Pdoc was like "Never take Abilify again.") He was all like, "Oh it acts differently at different numbers I will prescribe you 3 times as much you will be fine." I was like, "Oh dude I don't think this sounds good at ALL."
About a week later I was super manic an was fleeing.... Everyone... Like I took batteries out of my phone and dyed me and my kid's hair and changed clothes and was just LEAVING. So, I crashed in NM and when I feel bad I am like "Take your meds" I am MED compliant but eventually I lost time and I came too, and peered at my sleeping kiddo and was like, "Um my child is not safe with me since I am not safe myself." I called my family to my aid. They were not super nice. I kinda don't blame them.
Anyway I would up hospitalized (had a fever of 106 from o/d on Depakote not on purpose. and for 6 weeks with a doc trying to kill me. Seriously he put me on like 17 meds. He did not like women who cursed it was not SEEMLY . So like, my telling him "FU

you, I'm no here to meet YOUR moth

ing dependency needs l am the god

m patient did they not tell you about that at whatever sh

tty med school you went attended in the middle east?" (He was a Muslim dude.) That's bad like, I mean it's hard to form am alliance with you provider, so I was involuntary for six weeks.
I think the worst (as my mom was trying to obtain custody of my kid too, but she couldn't because I was the sole custodian or my ex would get him so she had to change her tune and be like, "My daughter, when not ill, is one of the best moms I ever met." Well one day I sat at the tiny crooked pane of glass they frosted it crooked and well a chipmunk would come and groom his whiskers on the cracked pavement outside .You could see a new pair of shoes. I was so despairing I just sat there, pulling hairs out of my head, thinking about m woes. I was pretty catatonic and did not feel a thing. I tried to break out the day before but you really can't.
They told the husband I was "Too sick to see him that day." He was awesome I heard him yelling all the way down the hall, "You can keep her in, yes but keep me out?" He just looked at my pile of hair and led me to the quiet room (which was forbidden) and I had a gigantic fit explaining my woes and how I tried to break out and failed, and well I stomped on my useless glass and decided to leave. But, I looked back at the patient husband he was like ,"Done, Anna?" and I collapsed on top him just BAWLING. I wanted my kid SO BAD. This social worker poked his head in and was like "No touching you too. My husband had a fit and was like, "Sometimes people NEED to be touched, to be loved, you think she's in a condition to DO anything do you? Shut the damn door if it bothers you so much." The social worker ACTUALLY DID it.
Anyway after 6 weeks of this insane crap, like the mental health rights people got a judge to come and I was transferred by my request to State where RATHER ironically they gave me 3 times the recommended dose of Seroquel while detoxing off ALL the other meds. Then, I had to fight for a year (this is short for CPS but we had a new worker who was just like "They paid for my education the minute I can I am OUT of here.") She could see the deal and difference between my mom's care and mine. It was pretty terrifying at times but seriously one of the worst years of my life.
My psychiatrist was so HORRIFIED at his mistake, he was like "Do you want another doc?" I was like, "YOU BROKE me you can fix me."
Oddly enough cholesterol was not mentioned AGAIN heh. When I quit smoking it went to normal anyway.
So yeah I don't trust hospitals one bit but GET why you hate them
@FranC mom, so I will go I promise. I mean I won't be on the psych unit I ASSSUME. LOL. I better not be. Etc.
Anna