Yes I still Smoke Cigarettes and I am addicted to the smoking habit - support and chat thread.

[ShariR]

Hi Shari. Who does the cooking?

I do the GOOD cooking. He will make his midnight messes, chopping onions, peppers, and throwing leftovers in a skillet for late night suppers. He is the outside grill master.

But it is his money and he lets me know it. Naw, he really is pretty good. I just don't know how to tell him he does not have 'it' when designing and building things. He has built a few projects but since they are in the garage and in his closet I kept my mouth shut. But the kitchen? I can not let that happen. Tact is not one of my strong suits. And I do not want to hurt him or his feelings. Got to figure a way to make him think buying a professional one is his idea. He knows what I am doing, too, so it is harder.

 

[Karen N Daytona]

Shari, there must be cake tonight, that will help to warm him up. Tomorrow you must feed his ego with food, there is no better way to get a man than with cake and food. After that you have to forget what you said and act like nothing was said at all. You continue to make cake and feed, meantime you find what you like at Home Depot or Lowes or even custom made. Must be well priced.
Tell him how smart he is and how you depend on him to make sound financial decisions for you both. You trust him but aren't sure about his friend's expertise.

 

[mdw3258calif]

OK, I am trying to learn to do this, so please be patient.

Here's a sound track, BE PATIENT -- there's no sexy video with it. Close your eyes and listen to this voice. The cool thing for me is that waaay back when I was in graduate school in Law Enforcement, I was in a night class where everyone else in the class was a cop, and a guy.... except me, on both counts. After class, which was located in a really rough part of town in Washington D.C., we would all sometimes go out to a seedy bar nearby. I would NEVER have gone if my buddies had not all been big guys with GUNS

So one night, this song came on in the seedy bar. One of our classmates started singing along with it. His voice was BETTER THAN THIS! We all just about fainted from awe. Close your eyes and imagine if the person sitting next to you suddenly started singing like this. 'Twas AWESOME!

 

[Karen N Daytona]

After 20 years together we get on pretty good with each other. We know each other's buttons and try not to push them. I pushed one with the island, and he pushed back with the build it himself. But I think he is serious. I am hoping that he will think about it and know food is more important than fluffing his ego. I do love him though, quirks and all. And he does pretty good putting up with my quirks. We can both be more than a bit stubborn so sometimes these incidents can get interesting. Most turn out funny in the end. Just not during them. Next year we will be laughing about the Island. At least I hope so.

He has never smoked and does not get my vaping, but is happy I am not smoking so he tolerates it in the house. Even though he does not understand it. Thinks it is like smoking.

We joke about him burying me under the poolhouse. Or I will tell him to just take me out back and shoot me when I get too old. But we keep saying to each other that we are not done making each other miserable yet. Of course, with a smile and a kiss.

In my house we call living together purgatory. I know I mean it when I say it.

 

[aikanae1]

I knew I blew it as soon as it came out of my mouth. But it was a spontaneous reaction to something so startling that it could not be helped. Panic ensues. Of course, he is now sleeping peacefully while I am going back and forth between shaking with fear and anger and apprehension. I can not let him build that island. Oh glory be.... I do not grovel well.

ETA: Oh geez. I just realized you said grovel AND tack in the same sentence. I am doomed!!!

Intervention. How do I explain this? He can't take your advice without loosing face (pride or whatever) so if you can get someone else to tell him, then he can agree with them without loosing face. How friendly are you with his contractor buddy? That would be ideal if he'd back out or pointed him in a different direction (yours).

There is also the chance that his reaction was a knee jerk reaction too and as time wears on, it'll be less important to him. You don't want this to become a power game, so don't bring it up and see if he mellows out. He surprised you with a Provari, he might do what you want again.

Remodeling is a mess even with proffessionals. It's much worse as a DIY project. Does he really want to take it on? His lazy side may start talking to him and he may back off on his own. There's a lot to do it sounds like. Maybe make a list and he'll see it's too much. I bet he does mellow with a little time and more thought. He was probably miffed that his idea was shot down so fast.

 

[Topdogie01]

ETA: Oh geez. I just realized you said grovel AND tack in the same sentence. I am doomed!!!

Its not the same sentence. .. there is a period separating the words. . Same paragraph.

 

[Karen N Daytona]

OK, I am trying to learn to do this, so please be patient.

Here's a sound track, BE PATIENT -- there's no sexy video with it. Close your eyes and listen to this voice. The cool thing for me is that waaay back when I was in graduate school in Law Enforcement, I was in a night class where everyone else in the class was a cop, and a guy.... except me, on both counts. After class, which was located in a really rough part of town in Washington D.C., we would all sometimes go out to a seedy bar nearby. I would NEVER have gone if my buddies had not all been big guys with GUNS

So one night, this song came on in the seedy bar. One of our classmates started singing along with it. His voice was BETTER THAN THIS! We all just about fainted from awe. Close your eyes and imagine if the person sitting next to you suddenly started singing like this. 'Twas AWESOME!

I loved this song always have!

were you on 14th? a very bad area

 

[ShariR]

I think you are most likely right, but it is such a scary prospect to me that I panic. And he can be stubborn when he gets the bit between his teeth. But since it supplies all the water to the kitchen and it will be impossible to cook around the area, I think he will come around eventually. The contractor friend is going to come out this Sunday or Monday to start ripping the ceilings down. Once the big mess starts I think his jets will cool. He just scares the crap out of me when he comes up with this stuff. And he has gone through with some of it so my fear is not unfounded. Time and cake and more time. I am going to try to get him to take me to Home Depot for ideas on what we like for islands, of course no committing to anything yet.

Intervention. How do I explain this? He can't take your advice without loosing face (pride or whatever) so if you can get someone else to tell him, then he can agree with them without loosing face. How friendly are you with his contractor buddy? That would be ideal if he'd back out or pointed him in a different direction (yours).

There is also the chance that his reaction was a knee jerk reaction too and as time wears on, it'll be less important to him. You don't want this to become a power game, so don't bring it up and see if he mellows out. He surprised you with a Provari, he might do what you want again.

Remodeling is a mess even with proffessionals. It's much worse as a DIY project. Does he really want to take it on? His lazy side may start talking to him and he may back off on his own. There's a lot to do it sounds like. Maybe make a list and he'll see it's too much. I bet he does mellow with a little time and more thought. He was probably miffed that his idea was shot down so fast.

 

[ShariR]

Its not the same sentence. .. there is a period separating the words. . Same paragraph.

Yes, dear.

Mr. Programmer.

 

[Topdogie01]

Well, something is going on at the bar down the street. About a dozen cops cars went past sirens blaring at 11pm... im debating if u should make some hot chocolate and sut outside and see what happens lol. Last time this happened there was a helicopter searching for someone.

In other news im thinking of making a loaded baked potato soup tomorrow. Just need the cheese and potatoes.

 

[Topdogie01]

And I blame MISS karen for my new Facebook addiction. Keep checking the groups she suggested every time there is a new post.

 

[Karen N Daytona]

And I blame MISS karen for my new Facebook addiction. Keep checking the groups she suggested every time there is a new post.

bwa-hahahahahahahahahaha I am evil!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Yakone]

I hope you're kidding. No one should live in fear, regardless of what gender one is.

 

[aikanae1]

I think you are most likely right, but it is such a scary prospect to me that I panic. And he can be stubborn when he gets the bit between his teeth. But since it supplies all the water to the kitchen and it will be impossible to cook around the area, I think he will come around eventually. The contractor friend is going to come out this Sunday or Monday to start ripping the ceilings down. Once the big mess starts I think his jets will cool. He just scares the crap out of me when he comes up with this stuff. And he has gone through with some of it so my fear is not unfounded. Time and cake and more time. I am going to try to get him to take me to Home Depot for ideas on what we like for islands, of course no committing to anything yet.

Oh I can imagine staying mellow on this would be h*ll. Take a xanax before you go. He might even pick out the styles you hate most. Remember, it's bait. Don't say yes or no. Point out something different. Distract. Anything to keep it from becoming a contest of wills. Point out practical, easy to clean, matching what you already have, granite adds value (store clerk will agree). It seems a little too soon to make such a big decision, can you stall a couple of days? Honestly, I think xanax is your friend. I suspect you are imaginging the worst. Even if he does take it on, the worst outcome is failure and a good chance you'll get to pick out what you wanted anyway. So it's really not the end of the world. Just a more expensive way to do it. But it'll work out.

 

[Yakone]

be afraid...very afraid...

 

[mdw3258calif]

I knew I blew it as soon as it came out of my mouth. But it was a spontaneous reaction to something so startling that it could not be helped. Panic ensues. Of course, he is now sleeping peacefully while I am going back and forth between shaking with fear and anger and apprehension. I can not let him build that island. Oh glory be.... I do not grovel well.

Shari, tell him the truth. Tell him that you are going to be so stressed about this, because it's such an important part of your home and life, that you don't want him to be subjected to all the angst you are going to go through while it's being done. Tell him it's going to be hard for you, and that you need his support to help you SUPERVISE the project, and that you really do not want to be in a position of supervising HIM. Shed a few tears. He might get the picture, and realize that he actually does NOT want to be in that position.

Tell him that in your vulnerable, tender emotional state, that you don't think you will be able to just let the guys "dig the hole" --- instead, you're going to need to be able to tell them HOW to dig the hole. That would not feel good to DH, and it would not feel good to you, either. Let the pros handle it, it's what they're used to, and what they get paid for.

Make sense at all?

 

[Karen N Daytona]

Well I am going to lay down for a bit, probably be abck in a while if not good night and sweet dreams!!!!!!!!!!!

Had a tough day, they put my fried in the hospital where he will finally get some help, needs back and neck surgery

 

[mdw3258calif]

Marla, be careful with those hh357 attys. They have to be slowly and carefully broken in. Use a clear, light juice and start with lower temps (volts) and work your way up slowly. This I have read from several hh357 users in various threads over the months. These guys are experts with them. Too much money to take a chance with them.

Yes ma'am. I watched the entire Cisco "user's manual" video, and took notes. I see that care is needed to work with them correctly. I also bought a few cheapie drip atomizers -- Karen linked a site that had them, but they were out of stock. Found another site that had them. I'll start with the cheapies 'till I feel I understand what dripping actually is, then graduate to the care and attention the hh357s need. I did buy also, for the first time, the unflavored and no-nic pure pg and pure vg that I can use as primer, and also use to change the mix of some of my juices if I want.

Thanks SO MUCH for the heads up! Never wasted on someone like me, who quickly gets over her head with gear! Really appreciate it

 

[Equality 7-2521]

hahahahahahahaha........whose kidding.

I hope you're kidding. No one should live in fear, regardless of what gender one is.

 

[Yakone]

Wear your amour well.