You do not want a ProVari if...

[zapped]

My death scenario for the Geico gecko involves chloroform, a curling iron, rectal insertion of said iron while he's knocked out and then plugging it in and waiting for him to wake up.

Either that or a clear piece of plexiglass placed over the toilet tank, weighted down with him inside and flushing repeatedly.

 

[PLANofMAN]

 

[MaDeuce]

I think I may need this.

 

[qorax]

The OP and u guys r awesome! Gave me a lot to think about...

 

[Omnipanzer]

We doing motivation now?

 

[bigbells]

I can't deal with a scenario that leaves the Allstate mayhem guy the sole survivor. Need to have him be the victim of the Allstate deep-voice guy, who is then wiped out with a drone missile.

 

[zapped]

Or his overly loud voice could awaken an amorous and angry bear

 

[The Ocelot]

You do not need a ProVari if

...you can have a conversation about the characters in insurance advertisements

Oh...wait...

 

[MaDeuce]

you do not want a provari if

...you can have a conversation about the characters in insurance advertisements

oh...wait...

...hey!!!!

 

[EddardinWinter]

We are still going on this today? And this time I can sip Crown while I do it? Okay, I am in!

 

[EddardinWinter]

You do not want a ProVari if...

...You are disturbed when I tell you that one of my 'happy places' is imagining Endor Moon, twenty minutes after the movie "Star Wars: The Return of the Jedi" ends. Think about it. Read the caption if you need more help.



Thirty billion tons of radioactive waste comes raining down on the Ewoks. But can you really call it 'waste' if it does this?

 

[MaDeuce]

.... if one of the goals in your life is dating someone who's exactly like Taylor Swift.

 

[The Ocelot]

...one of your goals in life is dating a beautiful girl who writes a song about how you dumped her.

 

[CountSmackula]

So if I like this, I shouldn't own a ProVari? Really? What about people who vape Pluid? or any other Murdock Juices...

Who's carrying Agent Orange?

 

[DaveP]

You don't want to buy a Provari if ...

--You hate being called a fanboy.

--You think no ecig should cost more than a carton of smokes.

--You think, "It's just a battery, anyway".

--You think, "One day China will open a reasonably cheap repair service for the stuff they sell".

And, the number one reason ...

--You say to yourself, "I don't know if I will like ecigs, anyway. I may just decide I like smoking better".

 

[MaDeuce]

... if you find yourself trying to figure out a way to put a 510 connector on your grandfather's old electric knife.

 

[EddardinWinter]

...You think poker is better with "lots of wild cards"
...You think that Greg and Marsha Brady's relationship was platonic
...You believe that Crown Royal Black is just too expensive

 

[EddardinWinter]

.... if one of the goals in your life is dating someone who's exactly like Taylor Swift.

...Unless you plan to kindap her and lock her in a refrigerator filled with Japanese Giant Hornets

 

[MaDeuce]

.... if you say that " a stainless steel mod would be just too heavy."

 

[DaveP]

.... if you say that " a stainless steel mod would be just too heavy."

Or, you don't like wearing a belt with your jeans.