Heather's Heavenly Vapes - THE BIG THREAD (Part 6)

[kkay59]

My son is close to that age CMD-KY. He is in the military though. That seems to give you a different perspective. Teens and very early twenties have a hard adjustment period. Some come along a bit slower, and some never get there. The military is a definite wake up call for those who tend to run in the slower category. It isn't for everyone though, that is for sure.

 

[Bronze]

Got a gen. Shoulda got one 20 years ago when I moved here. ENUF!!

 

[76bridget]

Got rid of my 22 (now 23) year old know it all in August. Was a rough summer...I feel for you. It will pass someday. Must say I really enjoy his visits now, but man those fights...not looking forward to when my 15 year old gets there. Stand strong, be blessed and know that somewhere in there is a wonderful young man in there who does love you, and someday will respect you again.

Thank you, that gives me a little hope. Both of my boys are good kids, never get into trouble but dang.. I'm just worn out with him right now.

 

[CMD-Ky]

My son is close to that age CMD-KY. He is in the military though. That seems to give you a different perspective. Teens and very early twenties have a hard adjustment period. Some come along a bit slower, and some never get there. The military is a definite wake up call for those who tend to run in the slower category. It isn't for everyone though, that is for sure.

My draft classification put me as one of the last called (1963), I would guess the invaders would have been at the city gates for Uncle Sam to want me, as the poster used to say. Odd though, I was fit enough to box and work in a steel mill, I never quite understood. I thought the military would have been a benefit to me.

 

[MostlySunny]

Thank you, that gives me a little hope. Both of my boys are good kids, never get into trouble but dang.. I'm just worn out with him right now.

I think my oldest will catch on to reality in the next few years, she’s making some great strides. My youngest will be in college next year. Hopefully she has some good choices avaiblbe and chooses wisely.

 

[Ceejay0875]

Thank you, that gives me a little hope. Both of my boys are good kids, never get into trouble but dang.. I'm just worn out with him right now.

Many hugs to you, what you are going through is not easy, but something every parent experiences to at least some degree. Neither one of my boys ever got into real trouble either, and always thought I was close to both of them. Then the oldest just snapped this summer and he was like a total stranger. The hatred and venom I sensed from him nearly destroyed me. I felt I had wasted my life and didn't want to go on knowing the being that I had loved so dearly and poured everything I had into him for so long hated me so much...but now I get the most awesome hugs, and they do heal. Hang in there dear.

 

[Bronze]

@Bronze I hope your power is restored sooner than expected..
We do not own a generator as we always had access to one when DH was teaching.. Should probably look into buying our own now.

Our temps have dropped and it seems to rain every weekend. The grass needs mowed badly but it's just too wet. I guess its good to live in the sticks where no one notices but me..

Anyone want an 18 year old know-it-all, ungracious, guilt trip inducing young man? Arguing over college commuting vs campus living costs.. If he commutes, he will have ZERO student loan debt at the end of 4 years, we can and will pay every cent. But I'm not willing to pay 3500 per semester for his dorm and meal plan. So unreasonable of me..

LMAO! Tell junior it gets worse from here on out. Tell him when he gets to my age he wont know anything. Age has a way of humbling a man.

 

[Bronze]

Many hugs to you, what you are going through is not easy, but something every parent experiences to at least some degree. Neither one of my boys ever got into real trouble either, and always thought I was close to both of them. Then the oldest just snapped this summer and he was like a total stranger. The hatred and venom I sensed from him nearly destroyed me. I felt I had wasted my life and didn't want to go on knowing the being that I had loved so dearly and poured everything I had into him for so long hated me so much...but now I get the most awesome hugs, and they do heal. Hang in there dear.

This I can say. Sons love their mothers. Might take awhile. Might not do well expressing it because, well, we're stupud men. But let anyone disparage or harm our moms and that sorry sad sack will wish he were dead. I believe that is near instinct.

 

[classwife]

My insecurity at it's finest...

I've been emailing back and forth with Rick a bit.
In the middle of it all (now, I have only been face to face with him once) it hit me...oh gee, does he even remember who I am that Robin had him message me ???
(I remember people, but do they remember me...)
So I asked

I had also told him that I have left her account open for a bit in case he would like to post.

His reply gave me a bit of a giggle so I'll pass it on along with the rest of it...


Hi Cindy:
I do remember you from the convention in Tampa. Plus, Robin talked about you all the time, so how could I forget?

Please thank Oliver and the entire ECF community for the outpouring of love for Robin. I have read all of their messages and I am extremely touched by how many people took the time to say something about her. I’d love to hug them all, as I’m sure Robin would as well.

You can close her account whenever you’d like to.

Thank you for being there for Robin and now for me.
Rick




(It sounds like he might not post, but I'm not going to close her account yet...just in case...)

 

[LAwaters]

Thank you, that gives me a little hope. Both of my boys are good kids, never get into trouble but dang.. I'm just worn out with him right now.

They do wear you down! Right now he’s probably thinking if he does college, he might as well get the “whole experience.” But it would be the most costly “experience trip” ever made. Hardest part of parenting is to hold fast even when they hate you. You are not denying him something that he actually, truly needs. The guilt is false.

You’ll get there!

 

[LAwaters]

My insecurity at it's finest...

I've been emailing back and forth with Rick a bit.
In the middle of it all (now, I have only been face to face with him once) it hit me...oh gee, does he even remember who I am that Robin had him message me ???
(I remember people, but do they remember me...)
So I asked

I had also told him that I have left her account open for a bit in case he would like to post.

His reply gave me a bit of a giggle so I'll pass it on along with the rest of it...


Hi Cindy:
I do remember you from the convention in Tampa. Plus, Robin talked about you all the time, so how could I forget?

Please thank Oliver and the entire ECF community for the outpouring of love for Robin. I have read all of their messages and I am extremely touched by how many people took the time to say something about her. I’d love to hug them all, as I’m sure Robin would as well.

You can close her account whenever you’d like to.

Thank you for being there for Robin and now for me.
Rick




(It sounds like he might not post, but I'm not going to close her account yet...just in case...)

How wonderful! I would’ve had the same insecurity. Thank you for sharing Rick’s message.

 

[LAwaters]

Got rid of my 22 (now 23) year old know it all in August. Was a rough summer...I feel for you. It will pass someday. Must say I really enjoy his visits now, but man those fights...not looking forward to when my 15 year old gets there. Stand strong, be blessed and know that somewhere in there is a wonderful young man in there who does love you, and someday will respect you again.

Thank you for sharing your story. I’m so thankful for you that it worked out well.

I think the key is where you mentioned respect. It has been severely eroded by our culture and when young people reach that natural “pushback” age, respect is weak or absent. Then the whole issue turns uglier than it ever needs to. Love does go far to hold bonds together, but respect is a key aspect.

Just my thoughts. And no doubt you are all stronger for having healed through it. Well done! Sending you hugs!

 

[MostlySunny]

My insecurity at it's finest...

I've been emailing back and forth with Rick a bit.
In the middle of it all (now, I have only been face to face with him once) it hit me...oh gee, does he even remember who I am that Robin had him message me ???
(I remember people, but do they remember me...)
So I asked

I had also told him that I have left her account open for a bit in case he would like to post.

His reply gave me a bit of a giggle so I'll pass it on along with the rest of it...


Hi Cindy:
I do remember you from the convention in Tampa. Plus, Robin talked about you all the time, so how could I forget?

Please thank Oliver and the entire ECF community for the outpouring of love for Robin. I have read all of their messages and I am extremely touched by how many people took the time to say something about her. I’d love to hug them all, as I’m sure Robin would as well.

You can close her account whenever you’d like to.

Thank you for being there for Robin and now for me.
Rick




(It sounds like he might not post, but I'm not going to close her account yet...just in case...)

Love this. Honestly it helps to know he’s read things and is chatting with you. Not sure what it helps, but I feel good about it.

 

[DavidOH]

@DavidOH DH just bought one of these heaters from Walmart for the camper, recommended by a friend. View attachment 773157

I've tried those heaters and others. I like the quartz radiant heaters. Don't need the room heated. I need me heated...

 

[DavidOH]

Went to Costco for my follow up. Had to sent the right hearing aid for repair as the volume button wasn't working. Likely wasn't working when I got them but I never checked. So I'll have to use my old ones for work. Down side is I'm without it for a week, maybe two. Upside my warranty will by extended for the time I don't have it. That's the way it goes when your dealing with electronics. And this is micro size.

 

[Bunnykiller]

@Bronze I hope your power is restored sooner than expected..
We do not own a generator as we always had access to one when DH was teaching.. Should probably look into buying our own now.

Our temps have dropped and it seems to rain every weekend. The grass needs mowed badly but it's just too wet. I guess its good to live in the sticks where no one notices but me..

Anyone want an 18 year old know-it-all, ungracious, guilt trip inducing young man? Arguing over college commuting vs campus living costs.. If he commutes, he will have ZERO student loan debt at the end of 4 years, we can and will pay every cent. But I'm not willing to pay 3500 per semester for his dorm and meal plan. So unreasonable of me..

College is over rated... its nothing but the end results of proving that one is smart enuf to do things ( even tho one has no experience to do it) save the money and let him fly
4-6 yrs of mental "gymnastics"... is it worth it?? it would be less expensive to buy the text books and learn on your own... and what happens when one doesnt get to finish and graduate... you dont get that coveted piece of paper stating that youve done it ( even tho one nearly did) but the real question is... is he up to it?? is he dedicated, mature, driven to go the distance to get a degree??? I would say that getting a degree is the hardest thing to do in life... marriage is easy, paying off a mortgage is easy, raising kids..ehhh never had the chance but Im gonna say thats difficult... but a degree, thats a challenge to be seriously considered... ( think youre smart?? surround yourself with lots of other smart people in college, then you will realize just how smart you are )

duhhh.. had a thought... if he is arguing over the differences, then he doesnt see the advantages of one over the other... this now begs the question... is he ready for college? I know I wasnt ready when I got out of high school.. I wasnt ready until I was 30.

and heres my last thoughts... I went to LSU in 1977 for 1 yr and the total cost was 1600$ for 2 semesters, dorm, food, books, and tuition.... and didnt learn a dayum thing other than panty raids required alot of running between the girls dormitories...

 

[Bunnykiller]

He would be perfectly content to not go to college and just work. He went through Vo-tech electrical trades and has worked for a couple of different local companies over the summers. College will definitely pay off for him, if he sticks with it. Sometimes I just want to throw my hands up and say 'go ahead, do it the hard way'.

you really want to know what to do with him? send him to Vo-Tech for Electrical Grid Systems ( the local power company) they make 80+K a yr and have awesome retirement benefits ( 50K+ a yr) all he needs to do is to stick with the same job and company for 27 yrs....

 

[Bunnykiller]

Got a gen. Shoulda got one 20 years ago when I moved here. ENUF!!

wudja get? whole house? or something economic?... I have a 13KW unit. runs the basics, 2 window units a/c, MW, TV, a few lites.... I even set up a volt meter that I plug into a socket to monitor the power draw on the house when its running... when the volts drop below 110 I turn off whatever to get it back up to 120... lucked out on the stove and water heater being gas... no hard core electrical draw on those 2 items...

 

[MostlySunny]

For Sadies summer course she had to compare all costs of 3 different colleges, local, out of state, and one other of your choice (she will have her associates when she finishes Hs so CC is not an option). It included everything from room and board to travel expenses back home. It then went on to calculating your starting salary with that degree and paying back money you’ve borrowed.

So at the end of all that, she put down her pencil and said, Looks like I’m going to ASU, unless I get a really good scholarship.

It was a really good lesson. I don’t know if that would work for Bridgets son?

 

[Hulamoon]

Got rid of my 22 (now 23) year old know it all in August. Was a rough summer...I feel for you. It will pass someday. Must say I really enjoy his visits now, but man those fights...not looking forward to when my 15 year old gets there. Stand strong, be blessed and know that somewhere in there is a wonderful young man in there who does love you, and someday will respect you again.

There is a line or two about that, that floats around now and then....God knew how hard it would be for mom n pop to part ways with the baby and child they loved so much and raised so, to make it easier, He invented "teenagers".