Vaping vs Smoking - An Experiment

[CocoaButter]

Actually, neither of us have any money...torture? Please. I'm not really doing anything except being passive and OFFERING something else until he can buy smokes.

He's an adult and can take care of himself why do I need to supply his habit? I never bought his cigarettes when I smoked, so I don't see why I should now...

And to some points...we have been together for over 20 years so I know whether I am creating a serious issue doing this or not. A little discomfort for a day or two is NOT the worst thing in the world, and I'm not going to leave him or cause a scene if he starts smoking again.

Well in the origonal post you did not say you didint have the funds, you said you wont buy them.
"Tonight, since he's got no money for smokes (and I'm not buying him any)"
Past that i did say i am sorry for any offense, and was just giving my mind, not starting a war here. That is simply how i feel and nothing more.


Also i come from a different place.. Where i come from money is most always shared, neither person in a relationship has a personal bank account or funds really.. Im old timey. Raised Old timey, and Old. lol. But really, no offence ment, thats why i said that the first time around. it was, as i said, my 2cents.

 

[soba1]

Lol, I'm gonna bet he ultimately becomes a full time vaper

 

[Sane Asylum]

Hi alisa,

You did the best you could and that's what counts. If he's not ready to vape, he's not ready. Giving him money for cigarettes is a tough call since you did offer him an alternative and you are low on funds too. You have to figure that one out.

I don't necessary agree with other posters about upping nic strength. I was a little over a PAD of light 100's and started with 12mg. I tried 18mg and it knocked me for a loop. Each person is different. What he maybe missing (like so many of us in the beginning) is all the other 'stuff' in cigarettes and he's withdrawing, especially since he said he was getting a headache. vaping isn't smoking. And he's gonna do what he wants.....however, if he continues to not be able to afford cigarettes, the ecigs may start to look and taste better and better.

Good luck!

 

[EvilZoe]

When I was broke, my mother flat out refused to buy my tobacco for me and I didn't hold it against her at all because I knew it was poisonous and bad for me. I knew she wanted me to quit.

I can see where it would be mean to withhold financial aid for other things but not for cigarettes. It's like buying ammo for a suicidal gun owner.

 

[vicflo]

be cool to see if this plays out well. good luck. quitting smoking is like several bad habits all in one. nic addiction is only a part of it.

 

[Daryl Glen]

If he can stay off the analogs for a couple of weeks, and then smells someone who has just smoked a cigarette, it MAY be the thing that pushes him over to the vaping side of things.
I know that after I was off the analogs for a couple of weeks, the "after" smell of someone who just smoked was literally disgusting. And I smoked 2 packs a day for over 20 years.
Also, I flat out refused to quit smoking even when my wife begged me to stop. One heart attack later, and that was all it took to get my attention!

 

[EvilZoe]

One heart attack later, and that was all it took to get my attention!

LOL @ "that was ALL it took"

Gee, JUST a little ol' heart attack, huh? hehehehe

 

[CocoaButter]

Thats...what it took for me! lol

 

[Daryl Glen]

LOL @ "that was ALL it took"

Gee, JUST a little ol' heart attack, huh? hehehehe

Tongue planted firmly in cheek!!

 

[alisa1970]

Well in the origonal post you did not say you didint have the funds, you said you wont buy them.
"Tonight, since he's got no money for smokes (and I'm not buying him any)"
Past that i did say i am sorry for any offense, and was just giving my mind, not starting a war here. That is simply how i feel and nothing more.


Also i come from a different place.. Where i come from money is most always shared, neither person in a relationship has a personal bank account or funds really.. Im old timey. Raised Old timey, and Old. lol. But really, no offence ment, thats why i said that the first time around. it was, as i said, my 2cents.

I get it, but it did come off as harsh and rather judgemental. Thanks for the clarification--generational norms may be part of the communication problem.

We are in our mid 40's, met when we were 19. For various reasons we have not tied the knot, but everyone thinks of us as "married". I will never combine bank accounts with him--he moved in with me only 10 years ago and I had already established my own financial life. He's terrible with money and would likely spend "our" money on "his" business (I've loaned him plenty), which doesn't make enough month to month to cover much. He has adult ADHD, so sometimes he IS like a child. I do what I can to distance myself financially because if I don't, it will affect me probably more than it will him.

That being said, I love him dearly.

I'm not on any mission to "get him to quit", but I also don't want to be the one caring for him if he gets lung cancer or some other smoking related disease, especially if he's acknowledged to himself that he should quit. This is my life too and it would tear me apart to have to live through that.

So, I expect that he will have figured out a way to get some cigarettes by the time I get home. It will be a pleasant surprise if he sticks with the vaping and actually likes it.

Hi alisa,

You did the best you could and that's what counts. If he's not ready to vape, he's not ready. Giving him money for cigarettes is a tough call since you did offer him an alternative and you are low on funds too. You have to figure that one out.

I don't necessary agree with other posters about upping nic strength. I was a little over a PAD of light 100's and started with 12mg. I tried 18mg and it knocked me for a loop. Each person is different. What he maybe missing (like so many of us in the beginning) is all the other 'stuff' in cigarettes and he's withdrawing, especially since he said he was getting a headache. Vaping isn't smoking. And he's gonna do what he wants.....however, if he continues to not be able to afford cigarettes, the ecigs may start to look and taste better and better.

Good luck!

I hope so--if not, it's not like anything will be any different! That's kind of why I was calling it an experiment.

 

[Mushroomie]

My situation is different. My Hubby stopped smoking cigars when I started vaping and weaning of analogs. I let him try my vape one night just for ....s and giggles he hacked his but off the first hit and I told him wait hit it again. Then he was like mmm he liked it. But he is not going to start vaping he quit smoking analogs years ago but then some one at his work gave him a good cigar he was hooked. He has quit off and on the past 10 years. He is doing awesome I wish I could have quit cold turkey (Been There Done That) I lasted 23 hours. LOL Just found a vape shop that will go down in miligrams of nicotine as you go. Right now 3 30ml bottles of juice and all kinds of bottles of mixes. LOL have to get rid of those first then I can think about dropping a few milligrams. Right now at 11mgs where I started. I had the same thinking process as you did. I smoked Misty Lights same amount of nicotine that your husband smokes. 11 worked for me 18 is to harsh IMO. I wish both of you luck!

Mushroomie

2 days free of analog cigs

 

[EvilZoe]

I needed higher nic occasionally at first to help me eliminate the cravings. I'm now back to around 12mg with some 18s here and there.

 

[JJ1977]

we dont contribute or support analogs lol. that was my wifes saying, she in 15 yrs of marriage she never bought 1 pack for me, i hate the smell of smoke in my house now, i argue with my mother and sister when they come over trying to light up. i tell them both, that [moderated] aint happening get out lol. i support what your doing alisa, 24mg i would assume would be benificial to him . i started at 18mg, now im at 7mg

 

[daleron]

Don't sweat it Alisa, you gave him an alternative until he can make his own choice; that's all you can do

 

[Myk]

Interesting that he was an ultra-light smoker and 24mg wasn't knocking him down.

I was a light smoker and 11mg was enough to give me periodic OD symptoms when I was first chain vaping.
Once I was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis and given the OK to use nicotine I had to work my way up to 18mg (because obviously 11mg wasn't enough to act like smoking with the UC even once I started on meds). That was after 6 months of mostly 0mg and 5.5mg, I was able to quickly go back to 11mg but 18mg wasn't happening easily.

Also interesting that WTA wasn't giving him what he misses.
I wonder what it is that he's missing?

If it's the ADHD the nicotine should be what fixes that. I wonder if he has an additional need for the MAOI cigarettes have.

My roommate says vaping satisfies his missed cigarettes when I hand him one and say to try it the next cigarette he wants, he just won't commit to switching (or even using an ecig for part of the day).

 

[Mohamed]

Also interesting that WTA wasn't giving him what he misses.
I wonder what it is that he's missing?

For me it was the taste. I tried various tobacco flavors but never found one that tasted like my Camel Lights. It wasn't until I tried a few of the other flavors that I got that ahh haa moment that it didn't need to taste like a "real" cig. I think it was a vanilla cupcake flavor where my eyes were suddenly opened and thought this isn't that bad at all.

So maybe give him a few different flavors to try out as well.

 

[Myk]

For me it was the taste. I tried various tobacco flavors but never found one that tasted like my Camel Lights. It wasn't until I tried a few of the other flavors that I got that ahh haa moment that it didn't need to taste like a "real" cig. I think it was a vanilla cupcake flavor where my eyes were suddenly opened and thought this isn't that bad at all.

So maybe give him a few different flavors to try out as well.

I was wondering about if it was taste.

I don't know the flavor she originally used but I looked it up and see it's a tobacco flavor. That could be it. The key to my accidental night without a cigarette was that watermelon is better than tobacco.

 

[alisa1970]

He actually likes the Turkish/Tribeca kinds, or at least says they're not as bad as the others...he's tried just about every flavor I have had. He's very picky. Hates strawberry, he might like a decent watermelon.

Quite honestly, I think most of it is in his head--he's EXTREMELY stubborn. He digs his heels in like nothing I've ever seen. One reason he hasn't asked me to marry him...

 

[Mark Anthony]

You're a good SO for caring enough to do this for him. Hope it works out..... For the both of you!!

 

[EvilZoe]

For me it was the taste. I tried various tobacco flavors but never found one that tasted like my Camel Lights. It wasn't until I tried a few of the other flavors that I got that ahh haa moment that it didn't need to taste like a "real" cig. I think it was a vanilla cupcake flavor where my eyes were suddenly opened and thought this isn't that bad at all.

So maybe give him a few different flavors to try out as well.

^^THIS

I wasn't ready to give up the analogs until after I found a flavor that I could deal with. In fact, the second day of vaping I was ready to write it all off as a loss because it all tasted yuck.

Not sure why I picked it back up day three but it was only a day or two after that that I completely gave up the analogs.