Older Folks and Vaping Back Porch-Part Six

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oldbroad

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Woke up with 2 dogs, a 6 year old, and the wife in the bed and dead beats wandering through my room like they belonged. Instant anxiety attack. Had to send everyone out.

Sent from a dark, twisted corner of the back porch, covered in cobwebs and slightly damp.

GOOD FOR YOU!!!!
 

DancingHeretik

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Woke up with 2 dogs, a 6 year old, and the wife in the bed and dead beats wandering through my room like they belonged. Instant anxiety attack. Had to send everyone out.

Sent from a dark, twisted corner of the back porch, covered in cobwebs and slightly damp.
I think I'ld need a bb gun if I were in your house. I don't like to yell and cuss. It hurts and upsets me to no end. I would prefer a bb gun, or maybe a few good throwing shoes next to the bed.
 

Kenna

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Woke up with 2 dogs, a 6 year old, and the wife in the bed and dead beats wandering through my room like they belonged. Instant anxiety attack. Had to send everyone out.

Sent from a dark, twisted corner of the back porch, covered in cobwebs and slightly damp.
Draw the line, throw them out, or give them a be out by date. That is YOUR home. My sister & BIL went thru something similar with his girls. They weren't moving in their friends but they were getting in troublen h sponging instead of growing up, getting jobs, & being responsible for themselves. He finally blew up, gave them a deadline, & enforced it. He stopped getting them out of jail, & getting them cars when they'd wreck theirs. One of them lost her license for 2 years & had to go to court ordered AA meetings as orbation terms. She had to take cabs & bum rides to get to themn because Daddy wouldn't help her. They ere on their own, & had no other options. They are great adults now.
Wife needs to see she's not doing the kids any favors.
 

umanbean

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In my recent experience, there are several distinct culinary phases after ones' wife leaves for a several-days road trip with her Mom and Sis:

1. Friday - after work, bring home take-out catfish plates for self and son.

2. Spend Saturday working outside and simultaneously 'cleaning out the fridge' and snack cabinet... have 'friendly' competition with son to see who gets 'the good stuff' first. Eat peanut butter on Ritz crackers, and potted meat on saltines for the first time in a long while... hmmm, not too bad...

3. Sat. eve. - after son leaves to go jukin', eat chicken and wild rice soup, cold, straight from can... augment with beer, saltines, and vienna sausage as necessary. Then open every door and turn on every light in the house; including deck, porches and carport. Stream smooth Jazz radio off internet after turning house stereo system up to '7'... work towards organizing 'stuff' - open all drawers in filing cabinet, spread papers out on all available horizontal surfaces, drag junk out of closets, stay up too late - snacking prolifically as-necessary. Crash on top of made-up bed, lights and music still on.

4. Sun. a.m. - drink too much coffee, eat last of lemon pound cake wife left, while watching CBS Sunday Morning - then later eat brunch: tuna-in-spring-water (again, straight from can) with saltines. After another while - assess pantry, cabinets, and freezers; make grocery list so I can go buy some 'good stuff'.

5. Decide instead to ride golf cart buggy in the woods and on dirt roads.
Charging it's battery, filling a cooler, grabbing a .22 rifle, takin' off... see y'all later!
 

classwife

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work towards organizing 'stuff' - open all drawers in filing cabinet, spread papers out on all available horizontal surfaces, drag junk out of closets


...don't tell me all that mess is still just sitting out !
 

oldbroad

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In my recent experience, there are several distinct culinary phases after ones' wife leaves for a several-days road trip with her Mom and Sis:

1. Friday - after work, bring home take-out catfish plates for self and son.

2. Spend Saturday working outside and simultaneously 'cleaning out the fridge' and snack cabinet... have 'friendly' competition with son to see who gets 'the good stuff' first. Eat peanut butter on Ritz crackers, and potted meat on saltines for the first time in a long while... hmmm, not too bad...

3. Sat. eve. - after son leaves to go jukin', eat chicken and wild rice soup, cold, straight from can... augment with beer, saltines, and vienna sausage as necessary. Then open every door and turn on every light in the house; including deck, porches and carport. Stream smooth Jazz radio off internet after turning house stereo system up to '7'... work towards organizing 'stuff' - open all drawers in filing cabinet, spread papers out on all available horizontal surfaces, drag junk out of closets, stay up too late - snacking prolifically as-necessary. Crash on top of made-up bed, lights and music still on.

4. Sun. a.m. - drink too much coffee, eat last of lemon pound cake wife left, while watching CBS Sunday Morning - then later eat brunch: tuna-in-spring-water (again, straight from can) with saltines. After another while - assess pantry, cabinets, and freezers; make grocery list so I can go buy some 'good stuff'.

5. Decide instead to ride golf cart buggy in the woods and on dirt roads.
Charging it's battery, filling a cooler, grabbing a .22 rifle, takin' off... see y'all later!

:lol::lol::lol::lol:
 

2legsshrt

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Happy birthaversary, @disallowedword

d58228585b80e4cba53c960a4e0e923a.jpg


Hope all's well!
I am wondering what happened to him. I've tried calling and PMing and nothing. Can't figure it out.
 

therussellv

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Well, it all blew up, the "father" caught the child in a lie and punched him hard enough to knock him back. My wife said that was wrong and the argument was on. They grabbed their stuff and left, the wife is on the phone with child services.

Sent from a dark, twisted corner of the back porch, covered in cobwebs and slightly damp.
 

umanbean

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Well, it all blew up.....

Russell, I'm sorry I can't give you any material support with your current RL situation right now. I hope everything works itself out the best for you.

Btw... I'm a little confused by your avatar. It seems to me to be a bit contradictory?

The motto...

Improvise
Adapt
Overcome

... has always been, to me, the epitome of 'calm and in control'.

also: "Make it work, make it, or make do." :)
 

Kenna

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In my recent experience, there are several distinct culinary phases after ones' wife leaves for a several-days road trip with her Mom and Sis:

1. Friday - after work, bring home take-out catfish plates for self and son.

2. Spend Saturday working outside and simultaneously 'cleaning out the fridge' and snack cabinet... have 'friendly' competition with son to see who gets 'the good stuff' first. Eat peanut butter on Ritz crackers, and potted meat on saltines for the first time in a long while... hmmm, not too bad...

3. Sat. eve. - after son leaves to go jukin', eat chicken and wild rice soup, cold, straight from can... augment with beer, saltines, and vienna sausage as necessary. Then open every door and turn on every light in the house; including deck, porches and carport. Stream smooth Jazz radio off internet after turning house stereo system up to '7'... work towards organizing 'stuff' - open all drawers in filing cabinet, spread papers out on all available horizontal surfaces, drag junk out of closets, stay up too late - snacking prolifically as-necessary. Crash on top of made-up bed, lights and music still on.

4. Sun. a.m. - drink too much coffee, eat last of lemon pound cake wife left, while watching CBS Sunday Morning - then later eat brunch: tuna-in-spring-water (again, straight from can) with saltines. After another while - assess pantry, cabinets, and freezers; make grocery list so I can go buy some 'good stuff'.

5. Decide instead to ride golf cart buggy in the woods and on dirt roads.
Charging it's battery, filling a cooler, grabbing a .22 rifle, takin' off... see y'all later!
You've more than made up for any amount of time you've ever spent not doing all of the above! Whoop!
 

DancingHeretik

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Well, it all blew up, the "father" caught the child in a lie and punched him hard enough to knock him back. My wife said that was wrong and the argument was on. They grabbed their stuff and left, the wife is on the phone with child services.

Sent from a dark, twisted corner of the back porch, covered in cobwebs and slightly damp.
Yes! Quick, change the locks!
 

umanbean

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...don't tell me all that mess is still just sitting out !

Yes'm... it is... :oops:

But I still have a few days before the boss gets back home tho.... :D

Like I told my son "To organize this mess, first I have to make a mess - deal with it."

You've more than made up for any amount of time you've ever spent not doing all of the above! Whoop!

That is the best non sequitur(?) I've seen today! :laugh:
 

2legsshrt

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Well, it all blew up, the "father" caught the child in a lie and punched him hard enough to knock him back. My wife said that was wrong and the argument was on. They grabbed their stuff and left, the wife is on the phone with child services.

Sent from a dark, twisted corner of the back porch, covered in cobwebs and slightly damp.
How old of a child are you talking.
 

DancingHeretik

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3" spiked heels. Once you master the technique, as good as a bb gun :)
Nope, too hard to throw straight. Plus, really hurts if you accidentally step on one. Besides, you don't want to risk causing permanent damage. Just a really rude awakening. Need a medium weight, hard shoe. Easy to throw and a good solid hit.

I've only done it a few times in my life. But, I definitely have done it. Very effective for people that think they're gonna get away with something.
Yes'm... it is... :oops:

But I still have a few days before the boss gets back home tho.... :D

Like I told my son "To organize this mess, first I have to make a mess - deal with it."
The worst part of organizing is the mess in between the old organization and the new. And, the scary part is whether or not the time and energy are going to be there to get it finished.
 

2legsshrt

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6 years old

Sent from a dark, twisted corner of the back porch, covered in cobwebs and slightly damp.
Yeah he can go to jail for that nowadays. We've been having a lot of that around here. The Stupid mothers leave their kids with their felon boyfriends and come back to a kid that never comes out of it again. Lately they have both been getting charged with felony child abuse and sometimes more than it should be murder.
 
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