Figure of speech.

I did watch the the video in its entirety. Too many steps? I want simple. Trouble-free. My requirements are so minimal, really:
1. Loose MTL (~1.8-2.5 mm airflow hole under the coil or equivalent)
2. 24 mm diameter
3. 3-4 ml capacity
4. 3-way airflow adjustments (under the coils and dual outside intakes)
5. Stainless steel and glass
6. Large and easy build deck
Am I being unreasonable?
So far, only Hastur meets all those requirements and it's sold out everywhere.
End of rant.
As you were.